(no subject)
ohkay so im waiting at the bus stop around 11 tonight. and i think to myself i really need to pee, and the bus shouldnt come for a bit since its so late, so i walk off to a tree and i start peeing, and the bus comes. and im like, 'oh my god, i better make that' but then i realize i can't because my thing is hanging out, so i have to miss it, and then i realize im peeing all over my shoes! gross! so im pretty drunk and i decide to go up and hang them on a railing, thinking, ohkay ill just leave them to dry, and theyll be ok when the bus comes. it is raining pretty hard at this time, so im sitting there watching the rain hit my shoes barefoot. and then the bus comes up and i go on without my shoes, and the drivers like, 'hey you need shoes to come here' and i thought, oh damn, my shoes are still drying, so i tell the driver can he wait a bit my shoes are drying and he's like, 'no, they're getting wetter by the second' and i realize oh shit! its raining! so i run over and grab the shoes, and i put them on and its really gross since i peed on them, and i realize i left my wallet at a friend's place so i dont have bus fare, and i plead with the driver for a long time before he lets me on. so i sit on the seat and im soaking wet and i smell like pee and im literally.standing.in.pee.
so its finally my stop and i say thanks to the dude and i hop off right into a puddle of mud. im sobering up a bit but i think 'oh god i've stepped into a pile of shit' and i sream "SHIT!" and then whoa, i realize the irony of that and i start laughing my ass off on the road and im wearing black and a car almost hits me which makes me go oh no and i run home, soaking wet, standing in pee and covered in mud and i start tearing my clothes off once i get in and then i realize my parents have friends over, and im like, 'oh god how embarassing' so i run upstairs (leaving muddy footprints because i was standing barefoot for a while) and showerrrr. and then i come down and apologize to everyone, and realize that i've got my friend's shoes.
also, im overly embellishing this story.
so its finally my stop and i say thanks to the dude and i hop off right into a puddle of mud. im sobering up a bit but i think 'oh god i've stepped into a pile of shit' and i sream "SHIT!" and then whoa, i realize the irony of that and i start laughing my ass off on the road and im wearing black and a car almost hits me which makes me go oh no and i run home, soaking wet, standing in pee and covered in mud and i start tearing my clothes off once i get in and then i realize my parents have friends over, and im like, 'oh god how embarassing' so i run upstairs (leaving muddy footprints because i was standing barefoot for a while) and showerrrr. and then i come down and apologize to everyone, and realize that i've got my friend's shoes.
also, im overly embellishing this story.