And now some little gems of wisdom found on message boards
"im drunk and i just made a good post... if i can do it you can too."
"My cat dancing on my keyboard while in microsoft frontpage could make a better website than that."
"Said about poison ivy: 'We used to eat it, thinking we would build an immunity to it. We weren't the brightest campfire in the woods.'"
"Oh. I knew it was in violation of federal laws, but I did not know it was illegal. Never mind then."
"I found out it isn't a good idea to empty a semi 12 gauge with #4 shot into a wasps nest as big as a medicine ball."
"You cannot prove a giant black transvestite didn't create the universe therefore it must be taught in a science class?"
"Tis a sad time we live in when art teachers get busted for kiddy porn instead of drug possession"
"I have noticed that every time i blink it gets dark?"
"to the person who asked about putting bengay on your penis a few weeks ago.. my god dude, if you want to keep your manhood dont do it. dont ever do it. ever. god help you if you do."
"I'm going over to live in Europe and I want to take a sheet of acid over with me. I'm too scared to take it on the plane, so I was thinking of faxing it over before hand. Can anyone tell me if this will work?"
"The only explanation that I can come up with is that he's clairvoyant and decided to answer your question before you asked. Using a "jedi mind trick" he fooled you into replying to the answer."
"Why do I need to see my house via satellite, when I can just step outside and there it is?"
"My cat dancing on my keyboard while in microsoft frontpage could make a better website than that."
"Said about poison ivy: 'We used to eat it, thinking we would build an immunity to it. We weren't the brightest campfire in the woods.'"
"Oh. I knew it was in violation of federal laws, but I did not know it was illegal. Never mind then."
"I found out it isn't a good idea to empty a semi 12 gauge with #4 shot into a wasps nest as big as a medicine ball."
"You cannot prove a giant black transvestite didn't create the universe therefore it must be taught in a science class?"
"Tis a sad time we live in when art teachers get busted for kiddy porn instead of drug possession"
"I have noticed that every time i blink it gets dark?"
"to the person who asked about putting bengay on your penis a few weeks ago.. my god dude, if you want to keep your manhood dont do it. dont ever do it. ever. god help you if you do."
"I'm going over to live in Europe and I want to take a sheet of acid over with me. I'm too scared to take it on the plane, so I was thinking of faxing it over before hand. Can anyone tell me if this will work?"
"The only explanation that I can come up with is that he's clairvoyant and decided to answer your question before you asked. Using a "jedi mind trick" he fooled you into replying to the answer."
"Why do I need to see my house via satellite, when I can just step outside and there it is?"