(no subject)
So I don't know if any of you know this, but way back in high school, I used to have horrifying nightmares that starred my then-boyfriend. Perhaps it was my unconscious telling me "He's not right for you!", but I don't know. Anyway, they started up again last night.
I had a dream where I had a kid. Which is a nightmare right there. I'd had a kid a couple months prior, in the dream, and the guy I was seeing (coincidentally, *not* the father; I'm not sure who the father was) was really cool with it, and he took us someplace for vacation where there was, at the same time, a fat camp being hosted. We weren't part of the fat camp. Also, weirdly, the guy was simultaneously himself and my high school boyfriend. It was like we were giving it another go, except this time, he was hotter.
Anyway, like I said, he was cool with it, and he was really great with the kid. So a few years pass, and I'm walking with him and my kid around the lake by my house (the real lake by my house), when all of a sudden my son asks me why my boyfriend was telling him I wasn't a good mother. I stop walking, look at my son, and realize this entire time, my boyfriend's been poisoning my own child against me. So I look up at him, and his expression has turned to this intensely frightening look of hatred and rage, and I realize Oh my God, he's going to kill me. So I take my son and start running, but because my kid's only two or three, he can't run very quickly, and the guy starts gaining on us. A woman we know sees this happening and runs in the opposite direction for help, but I know she can't help; she'll be too late. When he's almost on us, I realize he's going to kill me. 100% sure, he's going to kill me, take my son, and do God knows what with him. So I do the only thing I can think of to take the situation into my own hands, and I jump, with my son, into the lake. I drown myself and my son so that he can't get to us.
W. TF.
I woke up seriously upset and frightened, and couldn't get back to sleep very easily. I think it's worth noting that my unconscious made a point of saying "So this is more believable (I guess), this guy is also your ex."
In any case, the guy is actually a real guy, and I really am kind of seeing him. The worst part of this whole thing is trying to get my act together and get this out of my head before he calls tonight. Because I'm still kind of shaken.
I had a dream where I had a kid. Which is a nightmare right there. I'd had a kid a couple months prior, in the dream, and the guy I was seeing (coincidentally, *not* the father; I'm not sure who the father was) was really cool with it, and he took us someplace for vacation where there was, at the same time, a fat camp being hosted. We weren't part of the fat camp. Also, weirdly, the guy was simultaneously himself and my high school boyfriend. It was like we were giving it another go, except this time, he was hotter.
Anyway, like I said, he was cool with it, and he was really great with the kid. So a few years pass, and I'm walking with him and my kid around the lake by my house (the real lake by my house), when all of a sudden my son asks me why my boyfriend was telling him I wasn't a good mother. I stop walking, look at my son, and realize this entire time, my boyfriend's been poisoning my own child against me. So I look up at him, and his expression has turned to this intensely frightening look of hatred and rage, and I realize Oh my God, he's going to kill me. So I take my son and start running, but because my kid's only two or three, he can't run very quickly, and the guy starts gaining on us. A woman we know sees this happening and runs in the opposite direction for help, but I know she can't help; she'll be too late. When he's almost on us, I realize he's going to kill me. 100% sure, he's going to kill me, take my son, and do God knows what with him. So I do the only thing I can think of to take the situation into my own hands, and I jump, with my son, into the lake. I drown myself and my son so that he can't get to us.
W. TF.
I woke up seriously upset and frightened, and couldn't get back to sleep very easily. I think it's worth noting that my unconscious made a point of saying "So this is more believable (I guess), this guy is also your ex."
In any case, the guy is actually a real guy, and I really am kind of seeing him. The worst part of this whole thing is trying to get my act together and get this out of my head before he calls tonight. Because I'm still kind of shaken.