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May 24, 2009 20:29

The test was positive. I have to go back tomorrow to learn about pills and routines and all the rest of the rigmarole I will need to deal with ( Read more... )

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in_spectre_mors May 24 2009, 11:39:39 UTC
Johan, your strength in the face of this - as you say, your way - is an inspiration to me. Which is something you have always been. As ever, I will provide you with whatever assistance I can. And as to the matter of hope... well, I can only say that I am awaiting your new music eagerly indeed.

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and_in_between May 24 2009, 11:43:50 UTC
It's going to be alright. Werner didn't have long when he found out he was going to die. With this, I have time. I have time to do what I want to do. That's what is important. And, I think, the fact that my time here might be shorter than it otherwise may have been, is quite the motivator. I think that is why I can play again.

If you want to come visit some day soon, I will play some of it for you. Your opinion is highly valued.

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in_spectre_mors May 24 2009, 12:05:24 UTC
To see you rise to the very occasion of life... my friend, it brings tears to my eyes. To see something beautiful born of hardship is always a wonder, and your playing is, inevitably, beautiful. I would love to join you and hear some of it. Aside from dealing with the business and press side of things, my days will be quite free until the tour begins.

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and_in_between May 24 2009, 12:17:30 UTC
And my days are free because I can't go back to my position with the Symphony until I'm free again. Seeing you would lift my heart.

I'm sorry to make you cry, but I'm glad it was not out of sadness.

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in_spectre_mors May 24 2009, 12:24:16 UTC
It will be a bright day indeed when you are truly free once again. Until then, and indeed beyond, I shall be most pleased to lift your heart.

Emotions are running high, there is no doubt. It is a comfort, at least, to know we express such things, rather than hiding them.

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and_in_between May 24 2009, 12:34:10 UTC
Tomorrow I will be relocating to my new home with Klara (and a police escort, which must mean I am very important) and I would love you to see it.

Yes, it is. It's a comfort to be able to express them. In prison, I didn't have my piano and I wanted it. I know you will understand how horrible it was.

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in_spectre_mors May 24 2009, 12:41:15 UTC
It would be a pleasure, Johan! I would love to see the place that you will be making your home now.

Yes indeed, I do understand. May you never experience deprivation such as that again.

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and_in_between May 24 2009, 12:47:32 UTC
Wonderful.

Hear hear. Have there been times you have been kept from your guitar? I hope you never experience it again either.

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in_spectre_mors May 24 2009, 12:54:18 UTC
It's been a long time since anything like that has happened, but my home life as a child was such that I was kept from expressing myself. In any way, including musically. I had my guitar, but it may as well have been a million miles away when I needed it the most. Thankfully, I had the practice room at school as my salvation. So I wasn't kept from it entirely, but it wasn't an easy situation, by any stretch of the imagination.

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and_in_between May 24 2009, 12:57:02 UTC
No, I don't imagine it was.

Thank goodness we are both free of those places.

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in_spectre_mors May 24 2009, 13:00:33 UTC
Yes indeed. Freedom is a gift that I know neither of us shall ever undervalue.

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