getting larger, growing weaker

[and_i_kiss_you]

aaaaaaaaaand temporary-good-mood-of-thirty-minutes gone.

little things remind me this and that.
and i'm back to there.
but there is becoming more of a here these days.
and that worries me.
here, there, this that, bullshit.

how is it that i keep giving up?
you'd think "giving up" is rock bottom.
if so,
what the hell have i been doing?