friday the 13th
Bill Cosby: Stewie, what do you think candy is made out of?
Stewie Griffin: Sunshine and farts! What the hell kind of question is that?!
Meg: Mom, Dad--am I ugly?
Lois: Oh of course not sweetie!
Peter: Yeah, where'd you get a stupid idea like that?
Meg: Craig Hoffman.
Peter: Crai....Craig Hoffman said that? Well, he's a sharp kid. You might be ugly.
(Meg runs out crying)
Stewie: Easy! Massage the scalp. You're washing a baby's hair, not scrubbing vomit off your Christmas dress, you holiday drunk.
Peter: Our children are our greatest treasure. They deserve a school board president who doesn't leave her feminine ointments in the fridge next to the mustard. That was the worst sandwich I ever ate! She flosses in bed. She snores like a wildebeast. She freed Willie Horton. She nailed Donna Rice.
Lois: Peter, that's enough!
Peter: Eats babies.
Stewie Griffin: Sunshine and farts! What the hell kind of question is that?!
Meg: Mom, Dad--am I ugly?
Lois: Oh of course not sweetie!
Peter: Yeah, where'd you get a stupid idea like that?
Meg: Craig Hoffman.
Peter: Crai....Craig Hoffman said that? Well, he's a sharp kid. You might be ugly.
(Meg runs out crying)
Stewie: Easy! Massage the scalp. You're washing a baby's hair, not scrubbing vomit off your Christmas dress, you holiday drunk.
Peter: Our children are our greatest treasure. They deserve a school board president who doesn't leave her feminine ointments in the fridge next to the mustard. That was the worst sandwich I ever ate! She flosses in bed. She snores like a wildebeast. She freed Willie Horton. She nailed Donna Rice.
Lois: Peter, that's enough!
Peter: Eats babies.