(no subject)
I feel like giving a ridiculous commencement speech -- commencement for our new year are seniors.
Somehow, I lack the enthusiasm that has infected everyone else. As of right now, things look horribly pessimistic for me. I feel like my head is shattering to pieces and along with that, my mind and what remains of the heart. I really don't know how I'll react when I walk in through those doors and step into the hallways, where I'll never see Ryan, Sam, Chris, Oren, J.T., Annie, and Co. Will I still walk to Ryan's locker every morning to see if he's there? When I make my tea, will I strain my eyes to see Pete standing behind me? It stings -- all this raw emotion of leftover memories caused by the passing of insatiable Time.
I know, that under all circumstances, I should feel finally part of a cohesive group -- because that's what my friends and I are. But at the same time, I feel so alone.
No thoughts of love as of now. I've shed my goodbye to him. We'll see if that's revocable.
But here's my resolution -- be a teenager and do myself justice.
Been listening to Kent. Enjoying it immensely and self-inflicting bittersweet memories of Henrik, Robin, and Japan.