Providence.

[ananleithian]

Sometimes you only find out much later that things were meant not to happen in the first place. And often only much later are you finally thankful.

With that in mind, might we step into the future with more faith and hope. I am glad I am not where I could not have been anyway. I learned this today, and I am glad, too, that I am going where I could be going.

There mightn't be such a thing as love, and that mightn't be so bad. I should see what is good about what is presented to me and rejoice in that. I needn't always be a malcontent.

I say this because, for those who don't already know, I met someone. And he likes me. Part of me doesn't believe him, thinks he will change his mind after more time spent with me. But I like him anyway and it could be nice if I could get my shit together. It's all so foreign to me. Everything changed so quickly. And I don't feel capricious, as I used to. I feel progressive.

I wanted a knight, didn't I? And while perhaps he is not what I'm used to and will require the rebuilding of much of me which was lost in the fire, he does have eyes like the sea after a storm and he is very sweet. Perhaps I am only confused in that he is a compromise between the worlds between which I have been struggling.
And, for once in my life, there is reciprocity.
No hamsters, just reciprocity.