(no subject)
So its no secret that Ananda likes to eat. I am absolutely obsessed with food, I think of food all day. Anytime I am even slightly upset or uncomfortable, you know what fixes it? FOOD! Food fixes everything! I have pretty much always felt this way, but at this time in my life it has gotten WWAAAYYY out of control. So, now, because of this unbeleivably unhealthy habit that I have developed, the obvious outcome is that I am FAT. So, I am going to see my Dad in five days, and I am preparing for the comments about this.
"Look how good you used to look in this picture!"
"You are never gonna be able to do _____ unless you lose all that weight."
"We are just so concerned about your health."
For some reason they seem to think that I am completely oblivious to the fact that I am fat. I must not have any mirrors in my house. For some reason, no matter how many times I hear these comments, I just cant seem to let them roll off my back. The comments about not having a boyfriend so I must be a lesbian don't even faze me. I think its funny. The comments about my choice of career, so what! At least I HAVE a job, which NONE of my other siblings have (except of course you D'Lissa-i know that stay at home mom IS a full tme job!). But the fat comments still hurt.
But my point is, that I am so upset in anticipation of all the fat talk, that you know what I am doing? Of COURSE, I am EATING! Its almost funny, except that its kinda not. I had 6 donuts for dinner last nite. That is sick.
I just thought it funny (funny-sad, not really funny-haha) that I find myself in this self destructive cycle. I am upset about being fat so I eat. And then I am upset that I just ate so much, so I eat some more.
"Look how good you used to look in this picture!"
"You are never gonna be able to do _____ unless you lose all that weight."
"We are just so concerned about your health."
For some reason they seem to think that I am completely oblivious to the fact that I am fat. I must not have any mirrors in my house. For some reason, no matter how many times I hear these comments, I just cant seem to let them roll off my back. The comments about not having a boyfriend so I must be a lesbian don't even faze me. I think its funny. The comments about my choice of career, so what! At least I HAVE a job, which NONE of my other siblings have (except of course you D'Lissa-i know that stay at home mom IS a full tme job!). But the fat comments still hurt.
But my point is, that I am so upset in anticipation of all the fat talk, that you know what I am doing? Of COURSE, I am EATING! Its almost funny, except that its kinda not. I had 6 donuts for dinner last nite. That is sick.
I just thought it funny (funny-sad, not really funny-haha) that I find myself in this self destructive cycle. I am upset about being fat so I eat. And then I am upset that I just ate so much, so I eat some more.