!happy
OK. So this is what's been going on. I've not been writing much, especially on here, because I have been depressed. I have had problems with self-esteem. I've had some serious bouts of crappy-body-image. At times, the least little thing will provoke me into crying. I've been pretty lethargic. I'm stressed at work, for various reasons. Thursday (first day of my "weekend," currently) I was struck down with a big-nasty-verystrongbad headache (apparently due to molds). This does not make me happy.
I don't know what to do, I don't know how to fix this. But this seems to be what is wrong with me. This is what has been wrong with me for some time. And to be honest, I'm sick of it.
I am not happy. I have moments of happiness, to be sure. I even have days of happiness, from time to time. But I am not, generally, happy. How do I get happy? I have no clue. Some people just are. Some, apparently, are not. I want to be happy, but I have precious little idea what will make me happy in the long run.
I don't want a medal for this post, or a monument. I'm not trying to be a martyr. I know other folks have depression too, and they deal with it in their own ways. I'm just letting you know what's going on with me now.
I am so tired of this fight. So tired.
I don't know what to do, I don't know how to fix this. But this seems to be what is wrong with me. This is what has been wrong with me for some time. And to be honest, I'm sick of it.
I am not happy. I have moments of happiness, to be sure. I even have days of happiness, from time to time. But I am not, generally, happy. How do I get happy? I have no clue. Some people just are. Some, apparently, are not. I want to be happy, but I have precious little idea what will make me happy in the long run.
I don't want a medal for this post, or a monument. I'm not trying to be a martyr. I know other folks have depression too, and they deal with it in their own ways. I'm just letting you know what's going on with me now.
I am so tired of this fight. So tired.