my real-time conversation w/ a jewish girl
me (1:31:30 AM): hey
me (1:31:32 AM): wb
Her (1:32:11 AM): hi
me (1:31:39 AM): oh that japanese flag again
me (1:31:58 AM): people would think ur a japanese imperial solder.
me (1:32:00 AM): lol
Her (1:33:07 AM): lol no
Her (1:33:15 AM): i have the hong kong as my icon though
Her (1:33:21 AM): flag*
me (1:32:47 AM): haha
me (1:32:50 AM): i see that.
Her (1:33:31 AM): hong kong is my favorite place
me (1:33:03 AM): have u been to one?
Her (1:34:00 AM): no, i have never been to anywhere in east asia
Her (1:34:11 AM): the closest i've been was where i was born
me (1:33:37 AM): so it is like Rome to some girls.
Her (1:34:19 AM): but that's not even close
me (1:33:50 AM): a tour place you wish to go to
Her (1:34:30 AM): lol
Her (1:34:39 AM): i wanna go there and stay there a long time
me (1:34:12 AM): oh interesting
Her (1:34:53 AM): i plan on either living in hong kong or japan
me (1:34:18 AM): i was there twice
Her (1:34:56 AM): it's hard to decide
me (1:35:13 AM): once for a business school interview, 2nd time for business, 3rd time for pleasure
me (1:35:15 AM): i guess three times
me (1:35:27 AM): of course, the pleasure trip was the best
me (1:35:59 AM): u know HK is a very difficult place to live in.
me (1:36:05 AM): many live on boats
Her (1:37:07 AM): how so?
Her (1:37:46 AM): how is it so difficult?
Her (1:37:58 AM): i plan on living in the city if i live there
me (1:37:26 AM): just not much space
Her (1:38:10 AM): well of course
me (1:37:38 AM): japan is expensive as well.
Her (1:38:15 AM): china is really crowded
me (1:37:44 AM): why not living in Shanghai?
me (1:37:52 AM): it is still affordable to be there
Her (1:38:31 AM): i love hong kong culture
Her (1:38:36 AM): and i adore cantonese
me (1:38:05 AM): hmm sound like u will like singapore too
me (1:38:15 AM): for westerners, singapore is a good start to be in asia
Her (1:39:06 AM): i guess, but it's too odd for me lol
me (1:38:31 AM): the only problem is that u might get spoiled
Her (1:39:14 AM): they speak english so much there
Her (1:39:30 AM): i wanna live in a place where english is like a second language
me (1:38:56 AM): true but u can live in chinese as well.
Her (1:39:36 AM): and not spoken often
me (1:39:06 AM): i see
Her (1:39:47 AM): i hate english lol
Her (1:39:56 AM): it's soo boring lol
me (1:39:21 AM): singapore can spoil westerners because they are well-liked and respected.
me (1:39:43 AM): japanese people generally respect foreigners as part of the culture.
Her (1:40:19 AM): oh
me (1:40:10 AM): but normally mainland chinese people are very proud of themselves so they do not really value westerners other than in true business sense.
Her (1:40:55 AM): i know that
Her (1:41:08 AM): china rocks, so i don't blame them
me (1:40:36 AM): lol
Her (1:41:19 AM): i just happen to love hong kong
Her (1:41:32 AM): it's where my first love was born
me (1:41:02 AM): lol
me (1:41:09 AM): i do not know about HK boys
Her (1:41:53 AM): well he's really american
me (1:41:17 AM): but i do know HK girls are pretty, not all but some.
Her (1:42:03 AM): he left hk when he was like 6 months old
me (1:41:28 AM): i always thought best-looking chinese girls are from there.
me (1:41:35 AM): have thought, that is
me (1:41:52 AM): what do you think of asian girls?
Her (1:42:35 AM): i think out of all asian girls, korean girls are the prettiest
me (1:42:09 AM): i do agree with your assessment.
Her (1:42:50 AM): lol
me (1:42:24 AM): what do you think of asian girls in general?
Her (1:43:00 AM): and then japanese and then chinese
Her (1:43:07 AM): in terms of prettiness
me (1:42:36 AM): both asian girls from asia and those from the us
me (1:42:44 AM): no in terms of overall attractiveness
me (1:42:49 AM): and character
Her (1:43:35 AM): i think they for the most part are hot
Her (1:43:47 AM): and i think they're ok personality-wise
Her (1:44:09 AM): i don't have many asian female friends
me (1:43:38 AM): do u ever think the possibility that you become a bisexual someday playing with an asian couple?
me (1:43:40 AM): lol
Her (1:44:21 AM): lol not really
me (1:43:51 AM): it is funny you find asian girls hot
me (1:44:05 AM): i know one canadian blonde girl who loves chinese guys
Her (1:44:50 AM): i thought i could at one point, but then i realized that i'm too straight for that
me (1:44:15 AM): she would always bitch about korean girls
me (1:44:37 AM): like how they have short legs or how they are gold diggers or how they cannot work for themselves
Her (1:45:22 AM): oh my!
me (1:44:52 AM): one of those types who feel better about themselves by putting down competitors.
me (1:45:04 AM): rather than elevating themselves
me (1:45:05 AM): lol
Her (1:45:43 AM): lol i'm like that sometimes
Her (1:45:50 AM): but i can't hate on asian girls
Her (1:46:14 AM): i just hate on the white girls that date asian guys and the ugly white guys who date gorgeous asian girls
me (1:45:40 AM): oh that is a wonderful quality you have
me (1:45:57 AM): i do not know when i was in college, i was able to get to that level of understanding that you have now.
me (1:46:09 AM): in that sense, you are more mature than i am.
Her (1:46:52 AM): lol how so??
me (1:46:33 AM): i never put down other guys to make myself feel better.
Her (1:47:19 AM): well i said i do that sometimes
me (1:46:44 AM): but
Her (1:47:37 AM): not too often, but sometimes, i can't help myself
me (1:47:14 AM): i did put down asian girls to make my non-asian girl friends look better.
me (1:47:20 AM): which is an odd way of looking at things.
me (1:47:38 AM): but i like both asian and white girls nearly equally now.
me (1:48:15 AM): why do you have white girls dating asian guys? can you not relate?
Her (1:48:59 AM): i just get jealous
Her (1:49:04 AM): really really jealous
me (1:49:04 AM): i am sure some asian guys get jealous of you when you date their asian friend. lol so do not feel that bad.
Her (1:50:51 AM): i doubt it
me (1:50:17 AM): i envy but i do not feel that jealous. i do not know why. my life values have changed.
Her (1:51:02 AM): asian guys never show interest in me! T__T
me (1:50:33 AM): get out!
Her (1:51:14 AM): it's true
Her (1:51:24 AM): i just get ugly ghetto guys staring at me
me (1:50:58 AM): any girl who looks average gets hit on by guys in college.
Her (1:51:51 AM): well then i muct be incredibly ugly
me (1:51:15 AM): i can tell you that you would look at least average to many guys, both asians and white.
Her (1:51:54 AM): must*
Her (1:52:09 AM): i get hit on by black and hispanic guys only
me (1:51:35 AM): in fact, even below-average girls get hit on by drunk guys if they get really horny.
Her (1:52:17 AM): and i never show interest in them anyway
Her (1:52:29 AM): grr lol
me (1:52:09 AM): nah. i am sure it has more to do with your strategy.
me (1:52:18 AM): are you slim?
Her (1:53:20 AM): not really
me (1:52:48 AM): then?
Her (1:53:38 AM): i'm curvy i guess not fat though
me (1:53:31 AM): i hate girls who are slim, even though i gotta admit for some weird reasons, slim girls tend to like me better than voluptuous ones.
me (1:53:32 AM): lol
me (1:53:38 AM): i like curvy ones better, by the way.
Her (1:54:22 AM): oh
me (1:54:18 AM): i hate women who think they are hot by not eating much and being skinny. but the world values them. sheet. messed up beauty standard
me (1:54:48 AM): but i do not like fat women.
me (1:54:52 AM): they look lazy
Her (1:56:43 AM): well my body frame is prettu wide
Her (1:57:03 AM): i look bigger than i am, but i can feel my bones sometimes lol
me (1:56:33 AM): ?
Her (1:57:11 AM): pretty*
Her (1:57:17 AM): like my hips are wide
Her (1:57:22 AM): really wide ugh
Her (1:57:26 AM): it's gross
me (1:56:50 AM): oh i see
Her (1:57:33 AM): yea my body is weird
me (1:57:00 AM): haha
me (1:57:07 AM): do not think any body frame is weird
Her (1:57:51 AM): clothes fit me so badly lol
Her (1:58:06 AM): i'm short plus u have a big chest and wide hips
me (1:57:33 AM): u think u would look weird even if you lose weight?
Her (1:58:16 AM): it doesn't work so well lol
me (1:57:52 AM): lol
Her (1:58:32 AM): my friend said that if i lost weight, i would just look weird
me (1:58:00 AM): haha
Her (1:58:38 AM): like worse than now
me (1:58:05 AM): hmm
me (1:58:07 AM): do not worry
me (1:58:11 AM): i am sure you are not that bad
Her (1:58:51 AM): but i do wanna lose weight but my body frame won't change
Her (1:59:08 AM): i'll still be wide
me (1:58:33 AM): i cannot tell because i do not see a full photo of yours
Her (1:59:16 AM): lol that is why
me (1:58:39 AM): depends on how wide
Her (1:59:24 AM): just wide
Her (1:59:34 AM): but i can feel my hip bones
Her (1:59:45 AM): i just look kinda big lol
Her (1:59:49 AM): well i think so
me (1:59:17 AM): well kinda big is not bad at all
me (1:59:21 AM): depends on how big ur
Her (2:00:10 AM): lol not fat like i said
me (1:59:41 AM): u worry too much
me (1:59:46 AM): i wish i could see ur full photo
me (1:59:54 AM): so that i can tell u it is not really somethign to worry about
Her (2:04:00 AM): lol
Her (2:04:07 AM): well i think it is
Her (2:04:18 AM): it always seems like asian guys like skinny girls
me (2:05:33 AM): i cannot deny that it is not true
me (2:05:41 AM): but many of them are idiots
me (2:06:00 AM): i hate girls who think they are so hot just for the sake of being skinny
me (2:06:11 AM): it kinda angers me.
me (2:06:19 AM): but to tell u the truth, i do not like a fat girl either
me (2:07:29 AM): do u think
me (2:07:35 AM): many asian guys know u like them?
Her (2:09:26 AM): some do
Her (2:09:33 AM): but there's no interest on their part
Her (2:09:49 AM): and the guy i like now.... i dunno....
me (2:09:21 AM): send me ur full photo
Her (2:10:09 AM): i don't have one
me (2:09:34 AM): lol
me (2:09:38 AM): what the
me (2:09:47 AM): don't u have a photo where u fully stand?
Her (2:10:31 AM): no
Her (2:10:46 AM): i hate taking photos like that
Her (2:10:51 AM): i hate my body
me (2:10:19 AM): u r funny
me (2:10:24 AM): have u ever dated?
Her (2:11:18 AM): yes
me (2:10:45 AM): asian guy?
Her (2:11:28 AM): of course
me (2:10:53 AM): chinese?
Her (2:11:36 AM): mostly
me (2:11:01 AM): mostly?
Her (2:11:43 AM): yes lol
me (2:11:10 AM): then the rest?
Her (2:11:52 AM): my only real b/f was chinese
Her (2:12:02 AM): there were also korean guys and 2 japanese guys
me (2:11:28 AM): what do u mean by "real"?
Her (2:12:17 AM): well it was an actualy relationship
Her (2:12:21 AM): actual*
me (2:11:56 AM): why are you so worried if you were in fact able to date?
me (2:12:11 AM): based on these guys, can you confirm that you can attract at least some guys?
Her (2:12:50 AM): well none of the guys wanted me for the long haul
Her (2:12:56 AM): just for some fun then leave
Her (2:13:14 AM): they made me feel cheap
me (2:12:37 AM): why would they want you for some fun if your ass is so big and they do not want it?
me (2:12:52 AM): i would think if it were true, the reverse should happen
Her (2:13:48 AM): i dunno
Her (2:14:03 AM): none of the guys i was with were serious about me
Her (2:14:07 AM): they just wanted ass
me (2:13:35 AM): like they do not want to have fun with you because of your look but then some do for the long-term because they think you are a good friend.
Her (2:14:16 AM): i'm not even sure about my ex
Her (2:14:26 AM): they all used me
me (2:13:51 AM): for sex?
Her (2:14:34 AM): yes
me (2:14:08 AM): why would someone use you for sex if he thinks ur ass is too big for him?
me (2:14:37 AM): u know what i mean? isn't that odd that someone uses you for a physical reason when he does not think you have physical attraction?
Her (2:15:17 AM): being used for sex is not a good thing anyway
Her (2:16:26 AM): do it doesn't matter if they thought i was good-looking or not
Her (2:16:29 AM): i was used
me (2:15:55 AM): not good but says something about ur physical appearance
Her (2:16:37 AM): doesn't&
me (2:16:19 AM): odd. odd. these guys look ok to u?
Her (2:17:08 AM): some guys no
Her (2:17:14 AM): some were gorgeous
me (2:16:51 AM): hmmm why did u sleep with guys who look not even ok? lol
Her (2:18:10 AM): i don't know
Her (2:18:15 AM): sometimes it was to be nice
Her (2:18:24 AM): other times, i just let it happen
me (2:17:55 AM): hmm u definitely have a weak will
me (2:18:02 AM): guys can take advantage of that.
me (2:18:23 AM): but listen, don't u think these so-called gorgeous guys have other options to have sex with maybe some asian girls?
Her (2:20:49 AM): well they have a much bigger interest in white girls
Her (2:21:02 AM): and some didn't date asian girl anyway
me (2:20:27 AM): lol
me (2:20:47 AM): and anything wrong with that as a white girl? lol
Her (2:21:47 AM): nothing
me (2:21:19 AM): hmmm-- but tell me do they have other options?
Her (2:22:07 AM): i dunno
me (2:21:46 AM): i am trying to tell you why gorgeous men would sleep with u
me (2:22:03 AM): normally, he can find an alternative, can he not?
Her (2:22:57 AM): i have no idea
me (2:22:31 AM): hmm u seriously have a confidence problem.
me (2:22:42 AM): u should guard urself.
me (2:22:49 AM): do not give it out too easily
me (2:22:59 AM): make sure they are decent-looking at least
me (2:23:17 AM): respect your body
me (2:23:33 AM): i mean gaining weight is one thing but getting a bone is another
Her (2:24:27 AM): i know
me (2:23:56 AM): love the body ur parents have given u. if it really bothers u, maybe, a surgery can be done. i wonder if it would be as bad as you say it is.
Her (2:24:37 AM): i've stopped the meaningless sex
me (2:24:03 AM): otherwise, why would guys do it to you?
Her (2:24:49 AM): i know i know
me (2:24:23 AM): so this guy u like
me (2:24:26 AM): what happened?
Her (2:25:12 AM): i have no idea
Her (2:25:19 AM): he doesn't know what to do
me (2:24:40 AM): you have no idea about lots of things
Her (2:25:35 AM): he can't decide whether to be with me or not
me (2:25:02 AM): hmm
me (2:25:12 AM): have u talked to him about ur interest?
Her (2:25:56 AM): no
Her (2:26:00 AM): i'm too shy
Her (2:26:13 AM): my friend and his friend told him that i like him though
me (2:25:42 AM): and
Her (2:27:50 AM): he was kinda surprised
Her (2:28:01 AM): but he said that he needs to get to know me better
me (2:27:31 AM): hmm
me (2:27:41 AM): do u like a right man?
Her (2:28:26 AM): ..?
me (2:27:52 AM): do you know how u know if u like a right man?
Her (2:28:42 AM): umm... i think so..
Her (2:29:14 AM): i like him much more than all the guys i find attractive at my school
me (2:28:40 AM): lol
me (2:29:01 AM): obviously. i read ur webpage before. it has been a while ago though
me (2:29:04 AM): the same guy?
me (2:29:12 AM): is he a korean or chinese?
me (2:29:15 AM): i do not remember
Her (2:30:50 AM): he's japanese
me (2:30:15 AM): oh
me (2:30:21 AM): i think a japanese guy is cool
me (2:30:26 AM): do not get me wrong. i am straight.
Her (2:31:13 AM): lol ok
Her (2:31:14 AM): i get it
me (2:30:44 AM): normally japanese guys have emotional depth
me (2:30:49 AM): i mean some of them are quite perverted.
Her (2:31:36 AM): i know lol
me (2:30:58 AM): and they can be good friends to me for that reason.
me (2:30:59 AM): but
me (2:31:01 AM): haha
Her (2:31:44 AM): i think they're all pervs
me (2:31:11 AM): lol
me (2:31:15 AM): i do not believe u
me (2:31:24 AM): but that means all japanese guys can be my good friends
me (2:31:38 AM): but it has not been the case, so i would say the issue is in my favor.
me (2:31:39 AM): lol
Her (2:32:33 AM): lol
Her (2:32:52 AM): japanese guys are the most perverted
me (2:32:12 AM): wait. according to what u say, u like a perveted man
Her (2:32:57 AM): some just hide it well
Her (2:33:06 AM): lol not necessarily
me (2:32:32 AM): u like a perverted man.
me (2:32:40 AM): he is a japanese!
Her (2:33:25 AM): lol
Her (2:33:37 AM): he hides his pervertedness
me (2:33:11 AM): so you like a disguised perverted man
Her (2:33:59 AM): lol i guess
me (2:33:25 AM): lol
me (2:33:38 AM): why do u say all japanese guys are perverted?
Her (2:34:32 AM): they just are
me (2:33:58 AM): what a generalization
me (2:34:05 AM): how do u know?
Her (2:35:03 AM): it's just the way it is
Her (2:35:11 AM): some hide it well and some are outward with it
me (2:34:43 AM): when did u start noticing it?
Her (2:35:33 AM): when i became interested in japan
me (2:34:58 AM): WHAT?
me (2:35:12 AM): hmm your interest got deepened by finding out men are perverted.
Her (2:36:00 AM): lol no
me (2:35:24 AM): and you want to work in japan you would be surrounded by perverted men.
Her (2:36:10 AM): lol
me (2:35:33 AM): then, you will complain about how you are being used by them for sex.
Her (2:36:19 AM): lol no no
me (2:35:39 AM): perhaps, you are perverted?
Her (2:36:24 AM): i know i am
me (2:35:46 AM): lol
me (2:35:52 AM): a perfect match?
Her (2:36:38 AM): maybe
me (2:35:58 AM): haha
Her (2:36:55 AM): but chinese guys will always be my weakness lol
me (2:36:25 AM): hmmmmm
me (2:36:27 AM): how so?
Her (2:37:12 AM): they just are
Her (2:37:16 AM): especially hk guys
me (2:36:39 AM): lol
me (2:36:51 AM): what do you think i look like?
Her (2:37:38 AM): lol i dunno
me (2:37:06 AM): you have a photo without eyes shown.
Her (2:38:01 AM): i know
me (2:37:42 AM): u need to see eyes?
Her (2:38:32 AM): the whole picture
me (2:37:54 AM): haha
me (2:38:04 AM): lol
me (2:38:33 AM): i never give it away. i did it very few times in my life.
me (2:38:38 AM): in fact, all thru personal emails.
Her (2:39:36 AM): lol ok
me (2:39:10 AM): i just do not like my photo being circulated.
me (2:39:20 AM): because i know i am so hot not to be circulated.
Her (2:40:03 AM): i wouldn't circulate it
me (2:39:25 AM): just kidding.
Her (2:40:10 AM): lol
me (2:39:38 AM): really
Her (2:40:22 AM): yes
me (2:39:56 AM): but if you like an asian guy that much, i wonder how you would not find me attractive.
Her (2:40:54 AM): lol
me (2:40:22 AM): because i have experiences with even some white girls who said i was their first asian man.
Her (2:41:09 AM): lol
me (2:40:56 AM): but i tell u
me (2:41:19 AM): i am curious to find out what you think asian girls are like
me (2:41:26 AM): i mean in terms of behavior and personality
me (2:41:36 AM): anything negative you see in them?
Her (2:42:22 AM): i don't know enough to judge
me (2:41:52 AM): wow-- u r such a nice girl to other girls.
me (2:42:06 AM): then, why would you hate white girls you do not know but who you date asian guys?
Her (2:42:56 AM): lol i dunno
me (2:42:19 AM): who date asian guys? i mean
Her (2:43:01 AM): jealousy
Her (2:43:13 AM): like i could be in their place
Her (2:43:18 AM): but i'm not
me (2:42:42 AM): oh
me (2:42:50 AM): do they date hot guys or mediocre guys?
Her (2:44:10 AM): it varies
me (2:43:39 AM): so u r jealous for only those who date hot guys
Her (2:44:32 AM): yes mostly
me (2:43:58 AM): ha at least u r honest
me (2:44:18 AM): frankly, asian guys who date only white girls are self-haters.
me (2:44:29 AM): if they like themselves, they would like both.
me (2:44:55 AM): unless they like themselve so much that they like only asian girls.
Her (2:46:15 AM): oh
me (2:46:43 AM): do u like sushi?
Her (2:47:32 AM): yes lol
me (2:46:58 AM): do u like sashime?
me (2:47:28 AM): sashimi, i mean
Her (2:48:27 AM): yes lol
me (2:48:06 AM): what is ues?
Her (2:48:53 AM): ..?
me (2:48:28 AM): one of my friends asked me what ues was in the context of a japanese restaurant.
me (2:48:34 AM): i was not sure what it really meant.
Her (2:49:26 AM): lol i dunno
me (2:48:44 AM): "ues"
me (2:48:48 AM): i do not know either
me (2:49:36 AM): do you at least enjoy having sex with these guys who you think use you for sex?
Her (2:50:25 AM): sometimes
me (2:49:56 AM): good. do so only with those you can enjoy sex with
me (2:50:22 AM): would it bother u if someone dates u but never does not do sex to u?
me (2:50:33 AM): i mean never does sex to u?
Her (2:51:52 AM): yes
Her (2:51:56 AM): after a while
me (2:51:20 AM): interesting
Her (2:52:10 AM): not initially
me (2:51:37 AM): how long is "after a while"?
Her (2:52:25 AM): i dunno
me (2:53:09 AM): i could date someone for one year without sex
me (2:53:12 AM): even two years
me (2:53:25 AM): of course, before that, she would rape me.
Her (2:54:12 AM): lol
me (2:54:00 AM): it is interesting to me though
me (2:54:15 AM): i thought women are not interested in sex until they become older
me (2:54:37 AM): but then
me (2:54:46 AM): these days, i see trends otherwise
Her (2:55:35 AM): lol yea
me (2:55:03 AM): what do u like so much about sex?
Her (2:55:56 AM): just the feeling
Her (2:56:15 AM): otherwise, with my ex, i just loved being with him
me (2:55:42 AM): being with him part sounds the best
me (2:55:51 AM): sex is over-rated.
Her (2:56:59 AM): i know
Her (2:58:45 AM): well i did love my ex, so anything we did together was 100x times better than if i was with someone else doing the same thing
me (2:58:47 AM): oh i see
me (2:58:52 AM): did he love u?
Her (2:59:39 AM): no
me (2:59:00 AM): lol
me (2:59:02 AM): what the
me (2:59:11 AM): did u hang out with him a lot?
Her (2:59:58 AM): yes
me (2:59:24 AM): hmm how come u think he did not love u?
Her (3:00:12 AM): he told me
me (2:59:42 AM): lol
Her (3:00:29 AM): not funny
me (2:59:48 AM): what a mean guy
me (2:59:59 AM): how did u get to the level where he said it to u?
Her (3:00:55 AM): well it was a long time afgter we broke up
Her (3:00:58 AM): after*
me (3:00:38 AM): ok
me (3:00:42 AM): i must have hurt u quite a bit
me (3:00:45 AM): it
Her (3:01:30 AM): yes
Her (3:01:32 AM): of course
me (3:00:55 AM): why did he say it to u?
Her (3:01:38 AM): but i could feel it
Her (3:01:49 AM): i kept asking him why he left me
Her (3:01:59 AM): and he finally gave me ome concrete answers
me (3:01:18 AM): how long did he date u?
Her (3:02:10 AM): on and off for like 5 months
me (3:01:35 AM): what were the concrete answers?
Her (3:02:29 AM): well mainly that i smothered him emotionally
Her (3:02:38 AM): at least he felt that way
Her (3:02:57 AM): i loved him and he didn't love me
me (3:02:31 AM): yeah u sound like u can smother someone emotionally.
me (3:02:33 AM): hmmm
Her (3:03:25 AM): how so?
me (3:02:50 AM): sheeeet. honestly, the problem is i do not make women feel loved
me (3:03:13 AM): very few women feel loved by me, even if i went after them really hard
me (3:03:29 AM): i am a warm person who cannot easily feell love.
me (3:03:36 AM): i know it sounds a bit odd.
me (3:03:51 AM): so when i listen to a girl who can smother a guy emotionally, i can feel it.
Her (3:04:39 AM): i fall in love easily and quickly
Her (3:04:46 AM): but not after my ex
me (3:04:11 AM): i hardly feel love even to a sad extent.
Her (3:05:08 AM): i just fall into something close to love when i like a guy a lit
Her (3:05:12 AM): lot*
me (3:04:28 AM): i feel it cannot be a permanent feeling.
me (3:05:02 AM): yeah. u r an italian.
Her (3:05:50 AM): i'm not
me (3:05:12 AM): what r u?
Her (3:06:05 AM): not italian for sure
me (3:05:26 AM): lol
me (3:05:30 AM): tell me what u r
Her (3:06:22 AM): i was born in ukraine... =(
me (3:05:44 AM): oh
me (3:05:48 AM): ukraine girl
me (3:05:51 AM): even better
Her (3:06:45 AM): i'm nothing like those ukrainian girls tho
me (3:06:10 AM): i understand
Her (3:07:01 AM): i have like no russian friends
Her (3:07:04 AM): well close ones
me (3:06:28 AM): hmm
Her (3:07:17 AM): just acquantances
me (3:06:44 AM): do u know many ukrainians have mongolian bloods?
me (3:06:49 AM): blood
Her (3:07:33 AM): no
Her (3:07:39 AM): well i'm jewish too
me (3:07:13 AM): ok why not liking a jewish boy?
Her (3:07:57 AM): my family is religious, but i'm a flaming athiest lol
Her (3:08:03 AM): oh god no
me (3:07:22 AM): oh that explains.
me (3:07:29 AM): how so?
me (3:07:43 AM): born in nyc as a jew, not liking her religion. interesting
Her (3:08:43 AM): i was born in ukraine\
Her (3:08:51 AM): but i moved to nyc when i was 3
Her (3:09:09 AM): i fell into buddhism when i was 14
me (3:09:00 AM): i see
me (3:09:07 AM): how come at such a young age?
Her (3:10:00 AM): i dunno
Her (3:10:08 AM): maybe i needed something to believe in
Her (3:10:15 AM): i've been an athiest my whole life
Her (3:10:30 AM): even when i tried to be more jewish and tried to believe in god
me (3:10:02 AM): i see
me (3:10:09 AM): i like jewish food but i never get it
me (3:10:14 AM): i had it only once
Her (3:11:02 AM): it's alright
me (3:10:18 AM): when i was a high school student
Her (3:11:09 AM): i like korean food the most
me (3:10:30 AM): jews do not share their food with others.
me (3:10:33 AM): lol
Her (3:11:21 AM): lol they do
me (3:10:41 AM): really?
me (3:10:47 AM): where can i find jewish dishes?
Her (3:11:45 AM): in a jewish neighborhood
Her (3:12:08 AM): there are lots of jewish markets, bakeries, and restaurants
me (3:11:43 AM): oh
me (3:11:45 AM): i see
Her (3:12:36 AM): jewish people will share their food, but the religious ones are reluctant to befriend non-jews or jews who don't follow the faith
me (3:12:26 AM): i had a thing for jewish girls when i was a kid. but then now i hardly get a chance to speak to them, so i do not have a thing for anything.
me (3:12:43 AM): oh i like brunette and brown eyes.
Her (3:13:34 AM): that's me lol
me (3:12:53 AM): i mean dark brown hair.
me (3:13:18 AM): hmm
me (3:13:31 AM): i do not understand why u like these mean asian guys
me (3:13:42 AM): u should like some sensitive asian guys
Her (3:14:28 AM): i don't think they're mean when i meet them
me (3:13:50 AM): ohhhh
me (3:13:54 AM): yeah?
Her (3:14:48 AM): i only find out later when i'm sad that they've left me
me (3:14:28 AM): by the way, i like to be mean to girls. i would rather be mean to girls to offend them than be nice to them to get them.
me (3:14:48 AM): wow-- hypocrites.
Her (3:15:48 AM): lol
me (3:15:10 AM): by the way, i am an egoist, too.
me (3:15:26 AM): even worse, i have much hunger for money.
Her (3:16:19 AM): oh dear
me (3:15:57 AM): i would not mind a woman working at a bank while i rest home and cook korean dishes for her.
Her (3:16:50 AM): lol
me (3:16:14 AM): but then, even so,
me (3:16:27 AM): over a period of time, i will use her money to get a housemaid to cook korean dishes
me (3:16:33 AM): so i virtually want to do nothing!
Her (3:17:20 AM): lol
Her (3:17:25 AM): lazy bum
me (3:16:47 AM): something like that
me (3:16:51 AM): but reality hits me hard
me (3:16:57 AM): and i do what i want the girl to do.
me (3:17:08 AM): it is like a date. i want her to pay my meal but i pay her meal.
me (3:17:17 AM): so much burden on a handsome asian guy!!!
Her (3:19:05 AM): lol
me (3:18:30 AM): u think i am too selfish?
Her (3:19:20 AM): lol no
me (3:18:46 AM): aren't we all selfish?
Her (3:19:37 AM): yes
me (3:19:04 AM): at least you understand how i feel. that's great.
Her (3:19:55 AM): lol
me (3:19:37 AM): anyhow, it is getting late.
me (3:19:45 AM): nice talking to you about your problems
Her (3:20:33 AM): yes i was gonna say that
me (3:19:57 AM): lol
Her (3:20:42 AM): i have an early class
me (3:20:00 AM): good night.
Her (3:20:51 AM): goodnight
me (1:31:32 AM): wb
Her (1:32:11 AM): hi
me (1:31:39 AM): oh that japanese flag again
me (1:31:58 AM): people would think ur a japanese imperial solder.
me (1:32:00 AM): lol
Her (1:33:07 AM): lol no
Her (1:33:15 AM): i have the hong kong as my icon though
Her (1:33:21 AM): flag*
me (1:32:47 AM): haha
me (1:32:50 AM): i see that.
Her (1:33:31 AM): hong kong is my favorite place
me (1:33:03 AM): have u been to one?
Her (1:34:00 AM): no, i have never been to anywhere in east asia
Her (1:34:11 AM): the closest i've been was where i was born
me (1:33:37 AM): so it is like Rome to some girls.
Her (1:34:19 AM): but that's not even close
me (1:33:50 AM): a tour place you wish to go to
Her (1:34:30 AM): lol
Her (1:34:39 AM): i wanna go there and stay there a long time
me (1:34:12 AM): oh interesting
Her (1:34:53 AM): i plan on either living in hong kong or japan
me (1:34:18 AM): i was there twice
Her (1:34:56 AM): it's hard to decide
me (1:35:13 AM): once for a business school interview, 2nd time for business, 3rd time for pleasure
me (1:35:15 AM): i guess three times
me (1:35:27 AM): of course, the pleasure trip was the best
me (1:35:59 AM): u know HK is a very difficult place to live in.
me (1:36:05 AM): many live on boats
Her (1:37:07 AM): how so?
Her (1:37:46 AM): how is it so difficult?
Her (1:37:58 AM): i plan on living in the city if i live there
me (1:37:26 AM): just not much space
Her (1:38:10 AM): well of course
me (1:37:38 AM): japan is expensive as well.
Her (1:38:15 AM): china is really crowded
me (1:37:44 AM): why not living in Shanghai?
me (1:37:52 AM): it is still affordable to be there
Her (1:38:31 AM): i love hong kong culture
Her (1:38:36 AM): and i adore cantonese
me (1:38:05 AM): hmm sound like u will like singapore too
me (1:38:15 AM): for westerners, singapore is a good start to be in asia
Her (1:39:06 AM): i guess, but it's too odd for me lol
me (1:38:31 AM): the only problem is that u might get spoiled
Her (1:39:14 AM): they speak english so much there
Her (1:39:30 AM): i wanna live in a place where english is like a second language
me (1:38:56 AM): true but u can live in chinese as well.
Her (1:39:36 AM): and not spoken often
me (1:39:06 AM): i see
Her (1:39:47 AM): i hate english lol
Her (1:39:56 AM): it's soo boring lol
me (1:39:21 AM): singapore can spoil westerners because they are well-liked and respected.
me (1:39:43 AM): japanese people generally respect foreigners as part of the culture.
Her (1:40:19 AM): oh
me (1:40:10 AM): but normally mainland chinese people are very proud of themselves so they do not really value westerners other than in true business sense.
Her (1:40:55 AM): i know that
Her (1:41:08 AM): china rocks, so i don't blame them
me (1:40:36 AM): lol
Her (1:41:19 AM): i just happen to love hong kong
Her (1:41:32 AM): it's where my first love was born
me (1:41:02 AM): lol
me (1:41:09 AM): i do not know about HK boys
Her (1:41:53 AM): well he's really american
me (1:41:17 AM): but i do know HK girls are pretty, not all but some.
Her (1:42:03 AM): he left hk when he was like 6 months old
me (1:41:28 AM): i always thought best-looking chinese girls are from there.
me (1:41:35 AM): have thought, that is
me (1:41:52 AM): what do you think of asian girls?
Her (1:42:35 AM): i think out of all asian girls, korean girls are the prettiest
me (1:42:09 AM): i do agree with your assessment.
Her (1:42:50 AM): lol
me (1:42:24 AM): what do you think of asian girls in general?
Her (1:43:00 AM): and then japanese and then chinese
Her (1:43:07 AM): in terms of prettiness
me (1:42:36 AM): both asian girls from asia and those from the us
me (1:42:44 AM): no in terms of overall attractiveness
me (1:42:49 AM): and character
Her (1:43:35 AM): i think they for the most part are hot
Her (1:43:47 AM): and i think they're ok personality-wise
Her (1:44:09 AM): i don't have many asian female friends
me (1:43:38 AM): do u ever think the possibility that you become a bisexual someday playing with an asian couple?
me (1:43:40 AM): lol
Her (1:44:21 AM): lol not really
me (1:43:51 AM): it is funny you find asian girls hot
me (1:44:05 AM): i know one canadian blonde girl who loves chinese guys
Her (1:44:50 AM): i thought i could at one point, but then i realized that i'm too straight for that
me (1:44:15 AM): she would always bitch about korean girls
me (1:44:37 AM): like how they have short legs or how they are gold diggers or how they cannot work for themselves
Her (1:45:22 AM): oh my!
me (1:44:52 AM): one of those types who feel better about themselves by putting down competitors.
me (1:45:04 AM): rather than elevating themselves
me (1:45:05 AM): lol
Her (1:45:43 AM): lol i'm like that sometimes
Her (1:45:50 AM): but i can't hate on asian girls
Her (1:46:14 AM): i just hate on the white girls that date asian guys and the ugly white guys who date gorgeous asian girls
me (1:45:40 AM): oh that is a wonderful quality you have
me (1:45:57 AM): i do not know when i was in college, i was able to get to that level of understanding that you have now.
me (1:46:09 AM): in that sense, you are more mature than i am.
Her (1:46:52 AM): lol how so??
me (1:46:33 AM): i never put down other guys to make myself feel better.
Her (1:47:19 AM): well i said i do that sometimes
me (1:46:44 AM): but
Her (1:47:37 AM): not too often, but sometimes, i can't help myself
me (1:47:14 AM): i did put down asian girls to make my non-asian girl friends look better.
me (1:47:20 AM): which is an odd way of looking at things.
me (1:47:38 AM): but i like both asian and white girls nearly equally now.
me (1:48:15 AM): why do you have white girls dating asian guys? can you not relate?
Her (1:48:59 AM): i just get jealous
Her (1:49:04 AM): really really jealous
me (1:49:04 AM): i am sure some asian guys get jealous of you when you date their asian friend. lol so do not feel that bad.
Her (1:50:51 AM): i doubt it
me (1:50:17 AM): i envy but i do not feel that jealous. i do not know why. my life values have changed.
Her (1:51:02 AM): asian guys never show interest in me! T__T
me (1:50:33 AM): get out!
Her (1:51:14 AM): it's true
Her (1:51:24 AM): i just get ugly ghetto guys staring at me
me (1:50:58 AM): any girl who looks average gets hit on by guys in college.
Her (1:51:51 AM): well then i muct be incredibly ugly
me (1:51:15 AM): i can tell you that you would look at least average to many guys, both asians and white.
Her (1:51:54 AM): must*
Her (1:52:09 AM): i get hit on by black and hispanic guys only
me (1:51:35 AM): in fact, even below-average girls get hit on by drunk guys if they get really horny.
Her (1:52:17 AM): and i never show interest in them anyway
Her (1:52:29 AM): grr lol
me (1:52:09 AM): nah. i am sure it has more to do with your strategy.
me (1:52:18 AM): are you slim?
Her (1:53:20 AM): not really
me (1:52:48 AM): then?
Her (1:53:38 AM): i'm curvy i guess not fat though
me (1:53:31 AM): i hate girls who are slim, even though i gotta admit for some weird reasons, slim girls tend to like me better than voluptuous ones.
me (1:53:32 AM): lol
me (1:53:38 AM): i like curvy ones better, by the way.
Her (1:54:22 AM): oh
me (1:54:18 AM): i hate women who think they are hot by not eating much and being skinny. but the world values them. sheet. messed up beauty standard
me (1:54:48 AM): but i do not like fat women.
me (1:54:52 AM): they look lazy
Her (1:56:43 AM): well my body frame is prettu wide
Her (1:57:03 AM): i look bigger than i am, but i can feel my bones sometimes lol
me (1:56:33 AM): ?
Her (1:57:11 AM): pretty*
Her (1:57:17 AM): like my hips are wide
Her (1:57:22 AM): really wide ugh
Her (1:57:26 AM): it's gross
me (1:56:50 AM): oh i see
Her (1:57:33 AM): yea my body is weird
me (1:57:00 AM): haha
me (1:57:07 AM): do not think any body frame is weird
Her (1:57:51 AM): clothes fit me so badly lol
Her (1:58:06 AM): i'm short plus u have a big chest and wide hips
me (1:57:33 AM): u think u would look weird even if you lose weight?
Her (1:58:16 AM): it doesn't work so well lol
me (1:57:52 AM): lol
Her (1:58:32 AM): my friend said that if i lost weight, i would just look weird
me (1:58:00 AM): haha
Her (1:58:38 AM): like worse than now
me (1:58:05 AM): hmm
me (1:58:07 AM): do not worry
me (1:58:11 AM): i am sure you are not that bad
Her (1:58:51 AM): but i do wanna lose weight but my body frame won't change
Her (1:59:08 AM): i'll still be wide
me (1:58:33 AM): i cannot tell because i do not see a full photo of yours
Her (1:59:16 AM): lol that is why
me (1:58:39 AM): depends on how wide
Her (1:59:24 AM): just wide
Her (1:59:34 AM): but i can feel my hip bones
Her (1:59:45 AM): i just look kinda big lol
Her (1:59:49 AM): well i think so
me (1:59:17 AM): well kinda big is not bad at all
me (1:59:21 AM): depends on how big ur
Her (2:00:10 AM): lol not fat like i said
me (1:59:41 AM): u worry too much
me (1:59:46 AM): i wish i could see ur full photo
me (1:59:54 AM): so that i can tell u it is not really somethign to worry about
Her (2:04:00 AM): lol
Her (2:04:07 AM): well i think it is
Her (2:04:18 AM): it always seems like asian guys like skinny girls
me (2:05:33 AM): i cannot deny that it is not true
me (2:05:41 AM): but many of them are idiots
me (2:06:00 AM): i hate girls who think they are so hot just for the sake of being skinny
me (2:06:11 AM): it kinda angers me.
me (2:06:19 AM): but to tell u the truth, i do not like a fat girl either
me (2:07:29 AM): do u think
me (2:07:35 AM): many asian guys know u like them?
Her (2:09:26 AM): some do
Her (2:09:33 AM): but there's no interest on their part
Her (2:09:49 AM): and the guy i like now.... i dunno....
me (2:09:21 AM): send me ur full photo
Her (2:10:09 AM): i don't have one
me (2:09:34 AM): lol
me (2:09:38 AM): what the
me (2:09:47 AM): don't u have a photo where u fully stand?
Her (2:10:31 AM): no
Her (2:10:46 AM): i hate taking photos like that
Her (2:10:51 AM): i hate my body
me (2:10:19 AM): u r funny
me (2:10:24 AM): have u ever dated?
Her (2:11:18 AM): yes
me (2:10:45 AM): asian guy?
Her (2:11:28 AM): of course
me (2:10:53 AM): chinese?
Her (2:11:36 AM): mostly
me (2:11:01 AM): mostly?
Her (2:11:43 AM): yes lol
me (2:11:10 AM): then the rest?
Her (2:11:52 AM): my only real b/f was chinese
Her (2:12:02 AM): there were also korean guys and 2 japanese guys
me (2:11:28 AM): what do u mean by "real"?
Her (2:12:17 AM): well it was an actualy relationship
Her (2:12:21 AM): actual*
me (2:11:56 AM): why are you so worried if you were in fact able to date?
me (2:12:11 AM): based on these guys, can you confirm that you can attract at least some guys?
Her (2:12:50 AM): well none of the guys wanted me for the long haul
Her (2:12:56 AM): just for some fun then leave
Her (2:13:14 AM): they made me feel cheap
me (2:12:37 AM): why would they want you for some fun if your ass is so big and they do not want it?
me (2:12:52 AM): i would think if it were true, the reverse should happen
Her (2:13:48 AM): i dunno
Her (2:14:03 AM): none of the guys i was with were serious about me
Her (2:14:07 AM): they just wanted ass
me (2:13:35 AM): like they do not want to have fun with you because of your look but then some do for the long-term because they think you are a good friend.
Her (2:14:16 AM): i'm not even sure about my ex
Her (2:14:26 AM): they all used me
me (2:13:51 AM): for sex?
Her (2:14:34 AM): yes
me (2:14:08 AM): why would someone use you for sex if he thinks ur ass is too big for him?
me (2:14:37 AM): u know what i mean? isn't that odd that someone uses you for a physical reason when he does not think you have physical attraction?
Her (2:15:17 AM): being used for sex is not a good thing anyway
Her (2:16:26 AM): do it doesn't matter if they thought i was good-looking or not
Her (2:16:29 AM): i was used
me (2:15:55 AM): not good but says something about ur physical appearance
Her (2:16:37 AM): doesn't&
me (2:16:19 AM): odd. odd. these guys look ok to u?
Her (2:17:08 AM): some guys no
Her (2:17:14 AM): some were gorgeous
me (2:16:51 AM): hmmm why did u sleep with guys who look not even ok? lol
Her (2:18:10 AM): i don't know
Her (2:18:15 AM): sometimes it was to be nice
Her (2:18:24 AM): other times, i just let it happen
me (2:17:55 AM): hmm u definitely have a weak will
me (2:18:02 AM): guys can take advantage of that.
me (2:18:23 AM): but listen, don't u think these so-called gorgeous guys have other options to have sex with maybe some asian girls?
Her (2:20:49 AM): well they have a much bigger interest in white girls
Her (2:21:02 AM): and some didn't date asian girl anyway
me (2:20:27 AM): lol
me (2:20:47 AM): and anything wrong with that as a white girl? lol
Her (2:21:47 AM): nothing
me (2:21:19 AM): hmmm-- but tell me do they have other options?
Her (2:22:07 AM): i dunno
me (2:21:46 AM): i am trying to tell you why gorgeous men would sleep with u
me (2:22:03 AM): normally, he can find an alternative, can he not?
Her (2:22:57 AM): i have no idea
me (2:22:31 AM): hmm u seriously have a confidence problem.
me (2:22:42 AM): u should guard urself.
me (2:22:49 AM): do not give it out too easily
me (2:22:59 AM): make sure they are decent-looking at least
me (2:23:17 AM): respect your body
me (2:23:33 AM): i mean gaining weight is one thing but getting a bone is another
Her (2:24:27 AM): i know
me (2:23:56 AM): love the body ur parents have given u. if it really bothers u, maybe, a surgery can be done. i wonder if it would be as bad as you say it is.
Her (2:24:37 AM): i've stopped the meaningless sex
me (2:24:03 AM): otherwise, why would guys do it to you?
Her (2:24:49 AM): i know i know
me (2:24:23 AM): so this guy u like
me (2:24:26 AM): what happened?
Her (2:25:12 AM): i have no idea
Her (2:25:19 AM): he doesn't know what to do
me (2:24:40 AM): you have no idea about lots of things
Her (2:25:35 AM): he can't decide whether to be with me or not
me (2:25:02 AM): hmm
me (2:25:12 AM): have u talked to him about ur interest?
Her (2:25:56 AM): no
Her (2:26:00 AM): i'm too shy
Her (2:26:13 AM): my friend and his friend told him that i like him though
me (2:25:42 AM): and
Her (2:27:50 AM): he was kinda surprised
Her (2:28:01 AM): but he said that he needs to get to know me better
me (2:27:31 AM): hmm
me (2:27:41 AM): do u like a right man?
Her (2:28:26 AM): ..?
me (2:27:52 AM): do you know how u know if u like a right man?
Her (2:28:42 AM): umm... i think so..
Her (2:29:14 AM): i like him much more than all the guys i find attractive at my school
me (2:28:40 AM): lol
me (2:29:01 AM): obviously. i read ur webpage before. it has been a while ago though
me (2:29:04 AM): the same guy?
me (2:29:12 AM): is he a korean or chinese?
me (2:29:15 AM): i do not remember
Her (2:30:50 AM): he's japanese
me (2:30:15 AM): oh
me (2:30:21 AM): i think a japanese guy is cool
me (2:30:26 AM): do not get me wrong. i am straight.
Her (2:31:13 AM): lol ok
Her (2:31:14 AM): i get it
me (2:30:44 AM): normally japanese guys have emotional depth
me (2:30:49 AM): i mean some of them are quite perverted.
Her (2:31:36 AM): i know lol
me (2:30:58 AM): and they can be good friends to me for that reason.
me (2:30:59 AM): but
me (2:31:01 AM): haha
Her (2:31:44 AM): i think they're all pervs
me (2:31:11 AM): lol
me (2:31:15 AM): i do not believe u
me (2:31:24 AM): but that means all japanese guys can be my good friends
me (2:31:38 AM): but it has not been the case, so i would say the issue is in my favor.
me (2:31:39 AM): lol
Her (2:32:33 AM): lol
Her (2:32:52 AM): japanese guys are the most perverted
me (2:32:12 AM): wait. according to what u say, u like a perveted man
Her (2:32:57 AM): some just hide it well
Her (2:33:06 AM): lol not necessarily
me (2:32:32 AM): u like a perverted man.
me (2:32:40 AM): he is a japanese!
Her (2:33:25 AM): lol
Her (2:33:37 AM): he hides his pervertedness
me (2:33:11 AM): so you like a disguised perverted man
Her (2:33:59 AM): lol i guess
me (2:33:25 AM): lol
me (2:33:38 AM): why do u say all japanese guys are perverted?
Her (2:34:32 AM): they just are
me (2:33:58 AM): what a generalization
me (2:34:05 AM): how do u know?
Her (2:35:03 AM): it's just the way it is
Her (2:35:11 AM): some hide it well and some are outward with it
me (2:34:43 AM): when did u start noticing it?
Her (2:35:33 AM): when i became interested in japan
me (2:34:58 AM): WHAT?
me (2:35:12 AM): hmm your interest got deepened by finding out men are perverted.
Her (2:36:00 AM): lol no
me (2:35:24 AM): and you want to work in japan you would be surrounded by perverted men.
Her (2:36:10 AM): lol
me (2:35:33 AM): then, you will complain about how you are being used by them for sex.
Her (2:36:19 AM): lol no no
me (2:35:39 AM): perhaps, you are perverted?
Her (2:36:24 AM): i know i am
me (2:35:46 AM): lol
me (2:35:52 AM): a perfect match?
Her (2:36:38 AM): maybe
me (2:35:58 AM): haha
Her (2:36:55 AM): but chinese guys will always be my weakness lol
me (2:36:25 AM): hmmmmm
me (2:36:27 AM): how so?
Her (2:37:12 AM): they just are
Her (2:37:16 AM): especially hk guys
me (2:36:39 AM): lol
me (2:36:51 AM): what do you think i look like?
Her (2:37:38 AM): lol i dunno
me (2:37:06 AM): you have a photo without eyes shown.
Her (2:38:01 AM): i know
me (2:37:42 AM): u need to see eyes?
Her (2:38:32 AM): the whole picture
me (2:37:54 AM): haha
me (2:38:04 AM): lol
me (2:38:33 AM): i never give it away. i did it very few times in my life.
me (2:38:38 AM): in fact, all thru personal emails.
Her (2:39:36 AM): lol ok
me (2:39:10 AM): i just do not like my photo being circulated.
me (2:39:20 AM): because i know i am so hot not to be circulated.
Her (2:40:03 AM): i wouldn't circulate it
me (2:39:25 AM): just kidding.
Her (2:40:10 AM): lol
me (2:39:38 AM): really
Her (2:40:22 AM): yes
me (2:39:56 AM): but if you like an asian guy that much, i wonder how you would not find me attractive.
Her (2:40:54 AM): lol
me (2:40:22 AM): because i have experiences with even some white girls who said i was their first asian man.
Her (2:41:09 AM): lol
me (2:40:56 AM): but i tell u
me (2:41:19 AM): i am curious to find out what you think asian girls are like
me (2:41:26 AM): i mean in terms of behavior and personality
me (2:41:36 AM): anything negative you see in them?
Her (2:42:22 AM): i don't know enough to judge
me (2:41:52 AM): wow-- u r such a nice girl to other girls.
me (2:42:06 AM): then, why would you hate white girls you do not know but who you date asian guys?
Her (2:42:56 AM): lol i dunno
me (2:42:19 AM): who date asian guys? i mean
Her (2:43:01 AM): jealousy
Her (2:43:13 AM): like i could be in their place
Her (2:43:18 AM): but i'm not
me (2:42:42 AM): oh
me (2:42:50 AM): do they date hot guys or mediocre guys?
Her (2:44:10 AM): it varies
me (2:43:39 AM): so u r jealous for only those who date hot guys
Her (2:44:32 AM): yes mostly
me (2:43:58 AM): ha at least u r honest
me (2:44:18 AM): frankly, asian guys who date only white girls are self-haters.
me (2:44:29 AM): if they like themselves, they would like both.
me (2:44:55 AM): unless they like themselve so much that they like only asian girls.
Her (2:46:15 AM): oh
me (2:46:43 AM): do u like sushi?
Her (2:47:32 AM): yes lol
me (2:46:58 AM): do u like sashime?
me (2:47:28 AM): sashimi, i mean
Her (2:48:27 AM): yes lol
me (2:48:06 AM): what is ues?
Her (2:48:53 AM): ..?
me (2:48:28 AM): one of my friends asked me what ues was in the context of a japanese restaurant.
me (2:48:34 AM): i was not sure what it really meant.
Her (2:49:26 AM): lol i dunno
me (2:48:44 AM): "ues"
me (2:48:48 AM): i do not know either
me (2:49:36 AM): do you at least enjoy having sex with these guys who you think use you for sex?
Her (2:50:25 AM): sometimes
me (2:49:56 AM): good. do so only with those you can enjoy sex with
me (2:50:22 AM): would it bother u if someone dates u but never does not do sex to u?
me (2:50:33 AM): i mean never does sex to u?
Her (2:51:52 AM): yes
Her (2:51:56 AM): after a while
me (2:51:20 AM): interesting
Her (2:52:10 AM): not initially
me (2:51:37 AM): how long is "after a while"?
Her (2:52:25 AM): i dunno
me (2:53:09 AM): i could date someone for one year without sex
me (2:53:12 AM): even two years
me (2:53:25 AM): of course, before that, she would rape me.
Her (2:54:12 AM): lol
me (2:54:00 AM): it is interesting to me though
me (2:54:15 AM): i thought women are not interested in sex until they become older
me (2:54:37 AM): but then
me (2:54:46 AM): these days, i see trends otherwise
Her (2:55:35 AM): lol yea
me (2:55:03 AM): what do u like so much about sex?
Her (2:55:56 AM): just the feeling
Her (2:56:15 AM): otherwise, with my ex, i just loved being with him
me (2:55:42 AM): being with him part sounds the best
me (2:55:51 AM): sex is over-rated.
Her (2:56:59 AM): i know
Her (2:58:45 AM): well i did love my ex, so anything we did together was 100x times better than if i was with someone else doing the same thing
me (2:58:47 AM): oh i see
me (2:58:52 AM): did he love u?
Her (2:59:39 AM): no
me (2:59:00 AM): lol
me (2:59:02 AM): what the
me (2:59:11 AM): did u hang out with him a lot?
Her (2:59:58 AM): yes
me (2:59:24 AM): hmm how come u think he did not love u?
Her (3:00:12 AM): he told me
me (2:59:42 AM): lol
Her (3:00:29 AM): not funny
me (2:59:48 AM): what a mean guy
me (2:59:59 AM): how did u get to the level where he said it to u?
Her (3:00:55 AM): well it was a long time afgter we broke up
Her (3:00:58 AM): after*
me (3:00:38 AM): ok
me (3:00:42 AM): i must have hurt u quite a bit
me (3:00:45 AM): it
Her (3:01:30 AM): yes
Her (3:01:32 AM): of course
me (3:00:55 AM): why did he say it to u?
Her (3:01:38 AM): but i could feel it
Her (3:01:49 AM): i kept asking him why he left me
Her (3:01:59 AM): and he finally gave me ome concrete answers
me (3:01:18 AM): how long did he date u?
Her (3:02:10 AM): on and off for like 5 months
me (3:01:35 AM): what were the concrete answers?
Her (3:02:29 AM): well mainly that i smothered him emotionally
Her (3:02:38 AM): at least he felt that way
Her (3:02:57 AM): i loved him and he didn't love me
me (3:02:31 AM): yeah u sound like u can smother someone emotionally.
me (3:02:33 AM): hmmm
Her (3:03:25 AM): how so?
me (3:02:50 AM): sheeeet. honestly, the problem is i do not make women feel loved
me (3:03:13 AM): very few women feel loved by me, even if i went after them really hard
me (3:03:29 AM): i am a warm person who cannot easily feell love.
me (3:03:36 AM): i know it sounds a bit odd.
me (3:03:51 AM): so when i listen to a girl who can smother a guy emotionally, i can feel it.
Her (3:04:39 AM): i fall in love easily and quickly
Her (3:04:46 AM): but not after my ex
me (3:04:11 AM): i hardly feel love even to a sad extent.
Her (3:05:08 AM): i just fall into something close to love when i like a guy a lit
Her (3:05:12 AM): lot*
me (3:04:28 AM): i feel it cannot be a permanent feeling.
me (3:05:02 AM): yeah. u r an italian.
Her (3:05:50 AM): i'm not
me (3:05:12 AM): what r u?
Her (3:06:05 AM): not italian for sure
me (3:05:26 AM): lol
me (3:05:30 AM): tell me what u r
Her (3:06:22 AM): i was born in ukraine... =(
me (3:05:44 AM): oh
me (3:05:48 AM): ukraine girl
me (3:05:51 AM): even better
Her (3:06:45 AM): i'm nothing like those ukrainian girls tho
me (3:06:10 AM): i understand
Her (3:07:01 AM): i have like no russian friends
Her (3:07:04 AM): well close ones
me (3:06:28 AM): hmm
Her (3:07:17 AM): just acquantances
me (3:06:44 AM): do u know many ukrainians have mongolian bloods?
me (3:06:49 AM): blood
Her (3:07:33 AM): no
Her (3:07:39 AM): well i'm jewish too
me (3:07:13 AM): ok why not liking a jewish boy?
Her (3:07:57 AM): my family is religious, but i'm a flaming athiest lol
Her (3:08:03 AM): oh god no
me (3:07:22 AM): oh that explains.
me (3:07:29 AM): how so?
me (3:07:43 AM): born in nyc as a jew, not liking her religion. interesting
Her (3:08:43 AM): i was born in ukraine\
Her (3:08:51 AM): but i moved to nyc when i was 3
Her (3:09:09 AM): i fell into buddhism when i was 14
me (3:09:00 AM): i see
me (3:09:07 AM): how come at such a young age?
Her (3:10:00 AM): i dunno
Her (3:10:08 AM): maybe i needed something to believe in
Her (3:10:15 AM): i've been an athiest my whole life
Her (3:10:30 AM): even when i tried to be more jewish and tried to believe in god
me (3:10:02 AM): i see
me (3:10:09 AM): i like jewish food but i never get it
me (3:10:14 AM): i had it only once
Her (3:11:02 AM): it's alright
me (3:10:18 AM): when i was a high school student
Her (3:11:09 AM): i like korean food the most
me (3:10:30 AM): jews do not share their food with others.
me (3:10:33 AM): lol
Her (3:11:21 AM): lol they do
me (3:10:41 AM): really?
me (3:10:47 AM): where can i find jewish dishes?
Her (3:11:45 AM): in a jewish neighborhood
Her (3:12:08 AM): there are lots of jewish markets, bakeries, and restaurants
me (3:11:43 AM): oh
me (3:11:45 AM): i see
Her (3:12:36 AM): jewish people will share their food, but the religious ones are reluctant to befriend non-jews or jews who don't follow the faith
me (3:12:26 AM): i had a thing for jewish girls when i was a kid. but then now i hardly get a chance to speak to them, so i do not have a thing for anything.
me (3:12:43 AM): oh i like brunette and brown eyes.
Her (3:13:34 AM): that's me lol
me (3:12:53 AM): i mean dark brown hair.
me (3:13:18 AM): hmm
me (3:13:31 AM): i do not understand why u like these mean asian guys
me (3:13:42 AM): u should like some sensitive asian guys
Her (3:14:28 AM): i don't think they're mean when i meet them
me (3:13:50 AM): ohhhh
me (3:13:54 AM): yeah?
Her (3:14:48 AM): i only find out later when i'm sad that they've left me
me (3:14:28 AM): by the way, i like to be mean to girls. i would rather be mean to girls to offend them than be nice to them to get them.
me (3:14:48 AM): wow-- hypocrites.
Her (3:15:48 AM): lol
me (3:15:10 AM): by the way, i am an egoist, too.
me (3:15:26 AM): even worse, i have much hunger for money.
Her (3:16:19 AM): oh dear
me (3:15:57 AM): i would not mind a woman working at a bank while i rest home and cook korean dishes for her.
Her (3:16:50 AM): lol
me (3:16:14 AM): but then, even so,
me (3:16:27 AM): over a period of time, i will use her money to get a housemaid to cook korean dishes
me (3:16:33 AM): so i virtually want to do nothing!
Her (3:17:20 AM): lol
Her (3:17:25 AM): lazy bum
me (3:16:47 AM): something like that
me (3:16:51 AM): but reality hits me hard
me (3:16:57 AM): and i do what i want the girl to do.
me (3:17:08 AM): it is like a date. i want her to pay my meal but i pay her meal.
me (3:17:17 AM): so much burden on a handsome asian guy!!!
Her (3:19:05 AM): lol
me (3:18:30 AM): u think i am too selfish?
Her (3:19:20 AM): lol no
me (3:18:46 AM): aren't we all selfish?
Her (3:19:37 AM): yes
me (3:19:04 AM): at least you understand how i feel. that's great.
Her (3:19:55 AM): lol
me (3:19:37 AM): anyhow, it is getting late.
me (3:19:45 AM): nice talking to you about your problems
Her (3:20:33 AM): yes i was gonna say that
me (3:19:57 AM): lol
Her (3:20:42 AM): i have an early class
me (3:20:00 AM): good night.
Her (3:20:51 AM): goodnight