FIC: Amaryllis - Chapter 20: Pay for it
Title: Amaryllis - Chapter 20 - Pay for it
Author: Anae
Beta: Tegthe (Thanks a bunch again!)
Fandom: Uragiri wa boku no namae wo shitteiru - Betrayal knows my name
Characters/pairing: Shusei/Hotsuma
Rating: eventual M/NC-17 (because it's gonna take while - boys need to grow up, plus well, manga wasn't too helpful for hot scenes)
Spoilers: overall thorough the manga/anime
Disclaimer: After finishing and re-working with this, I would deserve the boys, but no. Not mine. The song used belongs to Shinedown.
Summary: Both Shusei and Hotsuma struggled with their fates, with themselves ever since they were kids. This is how it happened - how two children grew up to be Zweilts, partners, and eventually, grew to understand and love each other.
A/N: DUMB GIRL FORGOT, HAVE ANOTHER CHAPTER AT ONCE.
As for a better A/N; ...Unlike you may think, I love Shusei. And I do like Takashiro. A lot. I just think that he is one of the most cruel characters that I know - when it comes to what he's ready to to win the war. And after having lived so long for that sole purpose... It makes me wonder how much humanity he has left in him. (And when it comes to the mask Shusei wears in the anime and manga - I think he learned a lot from Takashiro when it comes to that.)
Ps. Do you know the symbolic meaning of Amaryllis? "Success won after a struggle."
Chapter 20 - Pay for it
And their one last wish is that you pay for it
And there's no way you're getting out of this
“You let the Duras escape.” Takashiro’s voice was flat, void of emotions, as if he didn’t believe what he was hearing - a second time today. Toko and Tsukumo had made the same mistake - instead of trusting their fellow Zweilt partners, they had stayed behind for too long - the Duras had managed to escape.
Needless to say, Takashiro wasn’t pleased with the result. Even if the man’s utter disappointment wasn’t readable from his eyes or posture, it was perfectly clear that it lingered there.
“But we got the other one!” Hotsuma tried to protest, futile as it was.
“A mid villain.”
Hotsuma groaned, raising his hand to run through the blonde locks. He eyed his partner behind him, trying to get some kind of assistance here, but it wasn’t even worth a try. Long time ago, Shusei had learned his place - to not argue with the Giou clan leader.
“If we had pushed any further, the human would’ve gotten hurt!”
Hotsuma didn’t understand what was so hard to comprehend about that - if they had chosen to attack the Duras with the means that were available, they would’ve hurt the poor human the monster was possessing, maybe even killed that person.
In Hotsuma’s eyes, that wasn’t even an option.
Takashiro leaned forward on his table, fingers pressed together as he looked at the pair over his glasses. “So, in short, you put the human life before stopping the Duras.”
There was a silence, since both of the boys could tell that Takashiro wasn’t going to be pleased with the answer. Lying wasn’t an option either, though.
“Yes.”
“You don’t think you did anything wrong?”
Upon hearing Takashiro’s words, Hotsuma opened his mouth but closed it before speaking again. Shusei still hadn’t said a word, and as the blond eyed his partner, Hotsuma doubted that Shusei would. “No”, he finally said, turning his gaze back to Takashiro. No matter what the old man thought, they weren’t going to kill a human being if that was a possibility - of course, if a Zweilt’s life would’ve been in danger, neither of them would have hesitated. But since that wasn’t the case…
The burn in Hotsuma’s golden eyes told Takashiro that the blonde really thought like that - he really thought that the pair had made the right choice.
“Thanks to you, that Duras is now running free”, Takashiro told them, merely stating the facts. “In the best case, he’ll go underground, trying not to be found.” The man paused, eyeing from blonde boy to the brunette and back. “Other possibilities are that he’ll start killing again. Which means more victims, naturally. Or…” The man paused again, leaning back on his chair, golden eyes never leaving the boys. “Or he’ll come after you. Or all of these.”
Takashiro let the words sink in before speaking again. Whatever that would happen, it wouldn’t be good - none of these scenarios were wanted. All of them would result in more victims. And all of this could’ve been avoided if the boys had just done what they were supposed to.
The same applied to the Murasame siblings - they would need to patch up their mistakes, too.
Hadn’t the war taught them to cast the feeling of pity aside? In the past, that feeling had brought nothing but harm upon the clan. Yet the Zweilt still hanged onto it - Takashiro knew Hotsuma and Shusei weren’t the only ones. Maybe it was the proof that they were still human in the heart? Or maybe Takashiro had lived too long to remember how it felt like to pity someone?
Nevertheless, pity was the one thing that you weren’t allowed feel towards the other side.
Takashiro could see as the seriousness of their actions were slowly starting to set inside the boys’ minds - they’d finally started to understand that by letting the Duras escape and letting the human live a while longer, they might not have saved people.
They might have saved the human possessed by the Duras - something the human brought upon himself - but at the same time, it was highly likely that they had doomed another innocent to die.
“But -“ Hotsuma started to protest, being blunt and quick to bring his opinion forth for the things he didn’t like. He kind of understood Takashiro’s point, but still, to kill that person… It wasn’t something they were meant to do, right? It wasn’t something they enlisted themselves to all those centuries ago.
But Takashiro lifted his hand, silencing the boy with that one simple movement - even Hotsuma knew that sometimes, it’s better to back down.
“Shusei, may I talk to you for a while?”
Takashiro’s words were formed like a question, but they really weren’t one - what their leader said, they would do.
Nevertheless, Shusei nodded as an answer, politely. “Of course.”
Hotsuma let out a grunt as he turned his back to Takashiro - it was clear that he wasn’t needed right now. He didn’t know what Takashiro wanted to talk to Shusei about that he wasn’t allowed to hear - after all, the situation was clear. According to the man, they made a great mistake and eventually, they’d pay for it. For the time being, they had to make up for it. That’s all there was to it - so what more there was to say?
Still, Hotsuma knew better than to say something. Instead, as he passed his partner, he tapped Shusei’s shoulder, encouragingly - the blonde wouldn’t like to be in the same room with Takashiro, not alone at least. “I’ll be waiting outside.”
“It’s not necessary”, Shusei told his partner, looking at his back. He knew Hotsuma wasn’t happy with the situation, and would like to over-hear, but the door was old, made of thick wood - there was no way he’d hear anything. Besides, this was something that would be better for Hotsuma not to hear. “Just go already. I’ll catch up soon.”
Hotsuma let out an annoyed sigh, but agreed. “Fine.”
With that, the younger boy was gone, slamming the door close as he went, making it even more visible that he was not happy with being told to leave.
“Shusei.”
The brunette boy turned his attention to their leader, watching the man lean over the table. Takashiro’s light bronze hair wasn’t tied up, the golden locks flooding down onto his sides as he pressed his long fingers together, locking his gaze with the youngster. “You do understand the severity of your mistake, don’t you?”
Shusei didn’t look away - he knew it wasn’t allowed and it would make no difference even if he did. “Yes”, he admitted. “I apologize.”
But Takashiro wasn’t quite done yet - he had to make sure that things like this wouldn’t occur again. “I understand Hotsuma’s resentment to hurt people”, Takashiro told the Zweilt. After all, Hotsuma was still afraid of his powers, even if he was able to use them in a battle already. “But you should know better than that.” He paused, looking at the boy with coldness creeping into his eyes. It might’ve been cruel to put even more weight on Shusei’s shoulders, Takashiro knew that, but there was no one but Shusei - had always been - to be able to handle Hotsuma. Just like he was the only one able to look after Hotsuma - to complete him and make up of his mistakes.
Shusei had said that himself once, long, long time ago - he might not remember after being reborn so many times but Takashiro did - and it meant Shusei couldn’t afford to make mistakes himself, no matter how hard and painful that might be.
“You don’t have that kind of luxury.”
Shusei averted his gaze - for a long time now, he had known that Hotsuma was the only one that mattered to him. And that was the way he was supposed to act - because he hadn’t killed the Duras, the demon might come back, haunting them, trying to kill them.
It was something that Shusei was supposed to prevent from happening - it was a mistake that couldn’t be tolerated.
“I understand”, the brunette boy finally answered the clan leader, still keeping his gaze away from Takashiro and the powerful aura the man was radiating. “May I leave?”
Takashiro kept silent for a while, studying the boy before him. “Yes”, he finally answered, allowing the boy to do as he wished to. After all, there wasn’t anything else to be discussed.
Shusei made it to the door, but as his hand touched the doorknob, the Giou clan leader spoke again. “Shusei.”
The boy turned half-way, looking at Takashiro - his expression was blank, emotions carefully hidden inside. It was the mask he had learned to wear, mastered it to perfection within a short period of time. Unlike many, Takashiro could see that - he remembered Shusei’s previous reincarnations after all - but made no comment about it. The way the Zweilt lived their lives wasn’t his concern as long as it wouldn’t affect their ability to fight in this war that had to be won.
“Find that Duras.” Takashiro’s voice left no place for argument - it wasn’t a question or a plea, it was a command. “And take care of it. If the human has to die along with it, then so be it.” He paused, making sure that he held the youngster’s eye-contact. “No more mistakes.”
Shusei’s eyes moved to the doorknob as he turned it, making the lock click and the door open. “Yes.”
The brunette Zweilt left the room, closing the door behind him as he stepped out. He wouldn’t make any more mistakes - he had made plenty already. He would just need to keep it up until Yuki would come - after that, maybe Hotsuma wouldn’t need him anymore.
Shusei let out a breath as he started walking towards the room he shared with Hotsuma, making sure that the mask was in place - no more mistakes were allowed, after all.
Author: Anae
Beta: Tegthe (Thanks a bunch again!)
Fandom: Uragiri wa boku no namae wo shitteiru - Betrayal knows my name
Characters/pairing: Shusei/Hotsuma
Rating: eventual M/NC-17 (because it's gonna take while - boys need to grow up, plus well, manga wasn't too helpful for hot scenes)
Spoilers: overall thorough the manga/anime
Disclaimer: After finishing and re-working with this, I would deserve the boys, but no. Not mine. The song used belongs to Shinedown.
Summary: Both Shusei and Hotsuma struggled with their fates, with themselves ever since they were kids. This is how it happened - how two children grew up to be Zweilts, partners, and eventually, grew to understand and love each other.
A/N: DUMB GIRL FORGOT, HAVE ANOTHER CHAPTER AT ONCE.
As for a better A/N; ...Unlike you may think, I love Shusei. And I do like Takashiro. A lot. I just think that he is one of the most cruel characters that I know - when it comes to what he's ready to to win the war. And after having lived so long for that sole purpose... It makes me wonder how much humanity he has left in him. (And when it comes to the mask Shusei wears in the anime and manga - I think he learned a lot from Takashiro when it comes to that.)
Ps. Do you know the symbolic meaning of Amaryllis? "Success won after a struggle."
Chapter 20 - Pay for it
And their one last wish is that you pay for it
And there's no way you're getting out of this
“You let the Duras escape.” Takashiro’s voice was flat, void of emotions, as if he didn’t believe what he was hearing - a second time today. Toko and Tsukumo had made the same mistake - instead of trusting their fellow Zweilt partners, they had stayed behind for too long - the Duras had managed to escape.
Needless to say, Takashiro wasn’t pleased with the result. Even if the man’s utter disappointment wasn’t readable from his eyes or posture, it was perfectly clear that it lingered there.
“But we got the other one!” Hotsuma tried to protest, futile as it was.
“A mid villain.”
Hotsuma groaned, raising his hand to run through the blonde locks. He eyed his partner behind him, trying to get some kind of assistance here, but it wasn’t even worth a try. Long time ago, Shusei had learned his place - to not argue with the Giou clan leader.
“If we had pushed any further, the human would’ve gotten hurt!”
Hotsuma didn’t understand what was so hard to comprehend about that - if they had chosen to attack the Duras with the means that were available, they would’ve hurt the poor human the monster was possessing, maybe even killed that person.
In Hotsuma’s eyes, that wasn’t even an option.
Takashiro leaned forward on his table, fingers pressed together as he looked at the pair over his glasses. “So, in short, you put the human life before stopping the Duras.”
There was a silence, since both of the boys could tell that Takashiro wasn’t going to be pleased with the answer. Lying wasn’t an option either, though.
“Yes.”
“You don’t think you did anything wrong?”
Upon hearing Takashiro’s words, Hotsuma opened his mouth but closed it before speaking again. Shusei still hadn’t said a word, and as the blond eyed his partner, Hotsuma doubted that Shusei would. “No”, he finally said, turning his gaze back to Takashiro. No matter what the old man thought, they weren’t going to kill a human being if that was a possibility - of course, if a Zweilt’s life would’ve been in danger, neither of them would have hesitated. But since that wasn’t the case…
The burn in Hotsuma’s golden eyes told Takashiro that the blonde really thought like that - he really thought that the pair had made the right choice.
“Thanks to you, that Duras is now running free”, Takashiro told them, merely stating the facts. “In the best case, he’ll go underground, trying not to be found.” The man paused, eyeing from blonde boy to the brunette and back. “Other possibilities are that he’ll start killing again. Which means more victims, naturally. Or…” The man paused again, leaning back on his chair, golden eyes never leaving the boys. “Or he’ll come after you. Or all of these.”
Takashiro let the words sink in before speaking again. Whatever that would happen, it wouldn’t be good - none of these scenarios were wanted. All of them would result in more victims. And all of this could’ve been avoided if the boys had just done what they were supposed to.
The same applied to the Murasame siblings - they would need to patch up their mistakes, too.
Hadn’t the war taught them to cast the feeling of pity aside? In the past, that feeling had brought nothing but harm upon the clan. Yet the Zweilt still hanged onto it - Takashiro knew Hotsuma and Shusei weren’t the only ones. Maybe it was the proof that they were still human in the heart? Or maybe Takashiro had lived too long to remember how it felt like to pity someone?
Nevertheless, pity was the one thing that you weren’t allowed feel towards the other side.
Takashiro could see as the seriousness of their actions were slowly starting to set inside the boys’ minds - they’d finally started to understand that by letting the Duras escape and letting the human live a while longer, they might not have saved people.
They might have saved the human possessed by the Duras - something the human brought upon himself - but at the same time, it was highly likely that they had doomed another innocent to die.
“But -“ Hotsuma started to protest, being blunt and quick to bring his opinion forth for the things he didn’t like. He kind of understood Takashiro’s point, but still, to kill that person… It wasn’t something they were meant to do, right? It wasn’t something they enlisted themselves to all those centuries ago.
But Takashiro lifted his hand, silencing the boy with that one simple movement - even Hotsuma knew that sometimes, it’s better to back down.
“Shusei, may I talk to you for a while?”
Takashiro’s words were formed like a question, but they really weren’t one - what their leader said, they would do.
Nevertheless, Shusei nodded as an answer, politely. “Of course.”
Hotsuma let out a grunt as he turned his back to Takashiro - it was clear that he wasn’t needed right now. He didn’t know what Takashiro wanted to talk to Shusei about that he wasn’t allowed to hear - after all, the situation was clear. According to the man, they made a great mistake and eventually, they’d pay for it. For the time being, they had to make up for it. That’s all there was to it - so what more there was to say?
Still, Hotsuma knew better than to say something. Instead, as he passed his partner, he tapped Shusei’s shoulder, encouragingly - the blonde wouldn’t like to be in the same room with Takashiro, not alone at least. “I’ll be waiting outside.”
“It’s not necessary”, Shusei told his partner, looking at his back. He knew Hotsuma wasn’t happy with the situation, and would like to over-hear, but the door was old, made of thick wood - there was no way he’d hear anything. Besides, this was something that would be better for Hotsuma not to hear. “Just go already. I’ll catch up soon.”
Hotsuma let out an annoyed sigh, but agreed. “Fine.”
With that, the younger boy was gone, slamming the door close as he went, making it even more visible that he was not happy with being told to leave.
“Shusei.”
The brunette boy turned his attention to their leader, watching the man lean over the table. Takashiro’s light bronze hair wasn’t tied up, the golden locks flooding down onto his sides as he pressed his long fingers together, locking his gaze with the youngster. “You do understand the severity of your mistake, don’t you?”
Shusei didn’t look away - he knew it wasn’t allowed and it would make no difference even if he did. “Yes”, he admitted. “I apologize.”
But Takashiro wasn’t quite done yet - he had to make sure that things like this wouldn’t occur again. “I understand Hotsuma’s resentment to hurt people”, Takashiro told the Zweilt. After all, Hotsuma was still afraid of his powers, even if he was able to use them in a battle already. “But you should know better than that.” He paused, looking at the boy with coldness creeping into his eyes. It might’ve been cruel to put even more weight on Shusei’s shoulders, Takashiro knew that, but there was no one but Shusei - had always been - to be able to handle Hotsuma. Just like he was the only one able to look after Hotsuma - to complete him and make up of his mistakes.
Shusei had said that himself once, long, long time ago - he might not remember after being reborn so many times but Takashiro did - and it meant Shusei couldn’t afford to make mistakes himself, no matter how hard and painful that might be.
“You don’t have that kind of luxury.”
Shusei averted his gaze - for a long time now, he had known that Hotsuma was the only one that mattered to him. And that was the way he was supposed to act - because he hadn’t killed the Duras, the demon might come back, haunting them, trying to kill them.
It was something that Shusei was supposed to prevent from happening - it was a mistake that couldn’t be tolerated.
“I understand”, the brunette boy finally answered the clan leader, still keeping his gaze away from Takashiro and the powerful aura the man was radiating. “May I leave?”
Takashiro kept silent for a while, studying the boy before him. “Yes”, he finally answered, allowing the boy to do as he wished to. After all, there wasn’t anything else to be discussed.
Shusei made it to the door, but as his hand touched the doorknob, the Giou clan leader spoke again. “Shusei.”
The boy turned half-way, looking at Takashiro - his expression was blank, emotions carefully hidden inside. It was the mask he had learned to wear, mastered it to perfection within a short period of time. Unlike many, Takashiro could see that - he remembered Shusei’s previous reincarnations after all - but made no comment about it. The way the Zweilt lived their lives wasn’t his concern as long as it wouldn’t affect their ability to fight in this war that had to be won.
“Find that Duras.” Takashiro’s voice left no place for argument - it wasn’t a question or a plea, it was a command. “And take care of it. If the human has to die along with it, then so be it.” He paused, making sure that he held the youngster’s eye-contact. “No more mistakes.”
Shusei’s eyes moved to the doorknob as he turned it, making the lock click and the door open. “Yes.”
The brunette Zweilt left the room, closing the door behind him as he stepped out. He wouldn’t make any more mistakes - he had made plenty already. He would just need to keep it up until Yuki would come - after that, maybe Hotsuma wouldn’t need him anymore.
Shusei let out a breath as he started walking towards the room he shared with Hotsuma, making sure that the mask was in place - no more mistakes were allowed, after all.