"What happened to you?"
One of my bosses asked me last night, between my classes.
What prompted this question was the fact I have about 3 months of late paperwork to catch up on. It has never happened before.
The only thing I could tell her was "What didnd't happen to me?". I didn't mean that in a snarky way and she knows it. But, frankly, can I be blamed for being just so mentally tired at this point?
The year started off pretty well, actually. If you count only January. I traveled with my mom and sis, we had a great time. Good company, good place, good food, good hotel.
While we were out of town, we got the news we'd been waiting for a few years now: sis got into Med School.
... in a private Med School, in a city nearby. So she had to move and we had to focus on getting a student loan or it'd become unpayable in a few months. Getting the student loan took from Feb to late March.
Meanwhile, my grandmother fell ill. She had been feeling bad for a long time and doctors kept saying it was nothing. Turns out it was something. And quite something, at that! Myeloma, a kind of bone merrow cancer that affects the blood (super strong anemia) and bones (pain and weakening of bones everywhere).
After the Student Loan Drama was over, Grams got the dyagnosis and was immediatly admitted into the hospital. After a few days, she was transfered to Intensive Care, where she contracted a pneumonia. After nearly two weeks in the hospital, Grams passed away. After 54 years of marriage, Gramps is a widow.
Grams taught me about pretty much everything, except how to deal with things without her. So this is what I'm doing: learning to live without my most beloved grandmother, who raised me. Who I had never been parted from for more than a month, while she'd be away visiting my great-grandparents.
My bosses were kind enough to give me a few days away from work. As she's my Grams, I don't have the legal right to a leave.
I came back to work after about a week, trying to get back on my feet and teach when more drama happened.
One of The Aunts, who isn't my aunt by blood, but surely is by heart, was also in the hospital. She was elderly, her health was not fine and doctors were telling the family it was only a matter of time. And time came. Two weeks after we burried my Grams, we burried Aunt L.
Another week and more bad news. A family, friends of ours, lost their 22 years old son. He was out with friends, slipped and hit the back of the neck - that spot where head and neck meet - on the first step and slid down hitting the same spot in every step until the bottom. He was in the hospital for two weeks (his accident was a few days after Grams's funeral), until he passed away too.
Twenty-two! The same age as my sister. The eldest of four kids. One of the most enchanting smiles I've ever seen, such a charismatic person that you just loved him. I still can't quite believe it.
It's not just losing three people that hit me hard this year. It's dealing with their absences and with everything that rubs it right on my face. Grams kept everything running. She took care of everything and everybody and now... Well, now there's a big part of it that became my responsibility. I have a home and an elderly grandfather to care for. To keep an eye on medication, to take to doctors, to run errands for...
So, really, after these months (specially the last month - yes, the three deaths were in just one month.), what didn't happen to me?
I'm not saying my life is worse than anybody else's, I know there are people going through things a lot worse. But... it doesn't mean this is easy.
What prompted this question was the fact I have about 3 months of late paperwork to catch up on. It has never happened before.
The only thing I could tell her was "What didnd't happen to me?". I didn't mean that in a snarky way and she knows it. But, frankly, can I be blamed for being just so mentally tired at this point?
The year started off pretty well, actually. If you count only January. I traveled with my mom and sis, we had a great time. Good company, good place, good food, good hotel.
While we were out of town, we got the news we'd been waiting for a few years now: sis got into Med School.
... in a private Med School, in a city nearby. So she had to move and we had to focus on getting a student loan or it'd become unpayable in a few months. Getting the student loan took from Feb to late March.
Meanwhile, my grandmother fell ill. She had been feeling bad for a long time and doctors kept saying it was nothing. Turns out it was something. And quite something, at that! Myeloma, a kind of bone merrow cancer that affects the blood (super strong anemia) and bones (pain and weakening of bones everywhere).
After the Student Loan Drama was over, Grams got the dyagnosis and was immediatly admitted into the hospital. After a few days, she was transfered to Intensive Care, where she contracted a pneumonia. After nearly two weeks in the hospital, Grams passed away. After 54 years of marriage, Gramps is a widow.
Grams taught me about pretty much everything, except how to deal with things without her. So this is what I'm doing: learning to live without my most beloved grandmother, who raised me. Who I had never been parted from for more than a month, while she'd be away visiting my great-grandparents.
My bosses were kind enough to give me a few days away from work. As she's my Grams, I don't have the legal right to a leave.
I came back to work after about a week, trying to get back on my feet and teach when more drama happened.
One of The Aunts, who isn't my aunt by blood, but surely is by heart, was also in the hospital. She was elderly, her health was not fine and doctors were telling the family it was only a matter of time. And time came. Two weeks after we burried my Grams, we burried Aunt L.
Another week and more bad news. A family, friends of ours, lost their 22 years old son. He was out with friends, slipped and hit the back of the neck - that spot where head and neck meet - on the first step and slid down hitting the same spot in every step until the bottom. He was in the hospital for two weeks (his accident was a few days after Grams's funeral), until he passed away too.
Twenty-two! The same age as my sister. The eldest of four kids. One of the most enchanting smiles I've ever seen, such a charismatic person that you just loved him. I still can't quite believe it.
It's not just losing three people that hit me hard this year. It's dealing with their absences and with everything that rubs it right on my face. Grams kept everything running. She took care of everything and everybody and now... Well, now there's a big part of it that became my responsibility. I have a home and an elderly grandfather to care for. To keep an eye on medication, to take to doctors, to run errands for...
So, really, after these months (specially the last month - yes, the three deaths were in just one month.), what didn't happen to me?
I'm not saying my life is worse than anybody else's, I know there are people going through things a lot worse. But... it doesn't mean this is easy.