In And Out of Uniform
HA! HA HA! This is just a little taste of that new story-idea I had for FMA. Hee... I love that series, but it's hard to write for it, because there's an air, or a feeling, or some strange... dynamic or something that I just can't capture. So I stick to writing Humor, and that usually works for it. Heh. This story is insane; but very fun. Heh. This is a scene where Ed had to go get a poor, drunked Hawkeye from a bar. Heh... Madness insues. So-- here we go!
“No!” she said wildly, swinging around on the stool to face him. “I... I don’t care! Have him; take him- no-one else wants him!” She frowned angrily, beginning a brilliantly drunken display. “And... and I don’t care! He’s a... a very bad man! A jerk! A-a worthless, paperwork-avoiding, womanizing, Edward-izing, smug, arrogant, puffed-up player of a colonel. So... so you know what? I don’t care; I don’t give a damn about him at all. Screw Roy!”
But just as she said that she gasped, and grabbed Ed’s coat. With wide-eyes he stared at her. “No! Don’t! Don’t screw Roy- please! He doesn’t deserve it; don’t you ever let him in your pants.” She turned around to face the rest of the bar. “Roy’s not getting any, right?” she asked loudly, nearly yelling over all the noise. “We’re not falling for his charms. No sex for Roy. No sex for Roy!”
All the occupants of the bar cheered loudly- paying little attention to what was being said, and more to the loud, commanding tone she was saying it in.
Hawkeye stood on the barstool, wobbling for a moment before regaining her balance enough to raise up her arms to call her comrades to the cause. “Are we going to take this any longer?” she asked wildly. Ed buried his face in his hands, wondering how the hell he was going to salvage any of his pride after being seen with such a... with such an incapacitated Hawkeye. If only there was a way to get her down...
“NO!” the rest of the crowed shouted in answer. She perked up more.
“And are we going to let him get away with it?”
“NO!”
“Are we going to let him string poor, unknowing women along, and take advantage of innocent young boys?”
“NO!”
“Hawkeye,” Ed muttered, “You really need to come down.”
She swatted him away. “Just a minute,” she said in a stage-whisper. “I’m just getting... uh... uh...” Trailing off in confusion, she made due by just pumping a fist in the air and yelling, “ROY’S NEVER GETTING ANY EVER AGAIN! NO SEX FOR ROY!”
The bar erupted in cheers.
----I have more, but that's all that I'll put up right now. Ha. This is great. Anyway, I'm working on all my other fanfics too, so I'm going to try to update regularly. I'm going to fail- I always do, but I can still hope. Right. Anyway, the next chapter of my new story RED has my attention now (I'm trying to finish it today), and then it's Lifestyles... and then I'll see what inspires me next. Til... next time, I guess!
bye bye bye,
ILB
“No!” she said wildly, swinging around on the stool to face him. “I... I don’t care! Have him; take him- no-one else wants him!” She frowned angrily, beginning a brilliantly drunken display. “And... and I don’t care! He’s a... a very bad man! A jerk! A-a worthless, paperwork-avoiding, womanizing, Edward-izing, smug, arrogant, puffed-up player of a colonel. So... so you know what? I don’t care; I don’t give a damn about him at all. Screw Roy!”
But just as she said that she gasped, and grabbed Ed’s coat. With wide-eyes he stared at her. “No! Don’t! Don’t screw Roy- please! He doesn’t deserve it; don’t you ever let him in your pants.” She turned around to face the rest of the bar. “Roy’s not getting any, right?” she asked loudly, nearly yelling over all the noise. “We’re not falling for his charms. No sex for Roy. No sex for Roy!”
All the occupants of the bar cheered loudly- paying little attention to what was being said, and more to the loud, commanding tone she was saying it in.
Hawkeye stood on the barstool, wobbling for a moment before regaining her balance enough to raise up her arms to call her comrades to the cause. “Are we going to take this any longer?” she asked wildly. Ed buried his face in his hands, wondering how the hell he was going to salvage any of his pride after being seen with such a... with such an incapacitated Hawkeye. If only there was a way to get her down...
“NO!” the rest of the crowed shouted in answer. She perked up more.
“And are we going to let him get away with it?”
“NO!”
“Are we going to let him string poor, unknowing women along, and take advantage of innocent young boys?”
“NO!”
“Hawkeye,” Ed muttered, “You really need to come down.”
She swatted him away. “Just a minute,” she said in a stage-whisper. “I’m just getting... uh... uh...” Trailing off in confusion, she made due by just pumping a fist in the air and yelling, “ROY’S NEVER GETTING ANY EVER AGAIN! NO SEX FOR ROY!”
The bar erupted in cheers.
----I have more, but that's all that I'll put up right now. Ha. This is great. Anyway, I'm working on all my other fanfics too, so I'm going to try to update regularly. I'm going to fail- I always do, but I can still hope. Right. Anyway, the next chapter of my new story RED has my attention now (I'm trying to finish it today), and then it's Lifestyles... and then I'll see what inspires me next. Til... next time, I guess!
bye bye bye,
ILB