New Story!
Firefly most of chapter 2 of "Buried"
pre-Rayne
She looked at him through the curtain of her hair, thin fingers picking at the hem of her dress. “Hurts to remember,” she ground out. “Did things to the girl, to all the subjects…” She curled into a tighter ball, whining softly.
“You don’t gotta talk about it, girl.”
“Yes! Will not have you saying… saying things - all untrue! Thinking things about the girl that are wrong, wrong, wrong!”
Jayne felt his own panic rising as hers did, and he was unsure how to handle the girl’s fit. He cleared his throat and tried to ignore his unease. “Jus’ calm down,” he told her awkwardly, not at all used to being comforting. “It’ll be - “
“No!” She scooted quickly away from him, leaning on her side against the grimy, wooden wall. Her hands fisted in her hair and her feet were rubbing together. “You see? You see? Frightened! Panic, unease - the girl causes all of this in you!” She covered her eyes with her arm. “Man-called-Jayne can make it go away, tell himself he doesn’t feel. Girl has no options! Everything! She must feel.” She whimpered, and from the noise he knew she was crying. “Must feel… Must feel.”
A part of Jayne knew that if the situation had been different, he’d ignore her completely. But they were alone and he was as tired and hungry as she was. They’d been stuck alone for a day and a half at least - maybe longer, he couldn’t be certain. Who knew if Serenity was coming back for them; Mal had to know they were missing, but would he decide they were worth returning for? Jayne wouldn’t, he knew, but Mal had proven time and again their values didn’t match.
He wanted to help her, to make her feel better; and even if a large part of that stemmed from his own inability to deal with a hysterical woman, the desire was still there. So he coughed and stood up. She looked so pathetic, curled up and crying. He’d never seen her as strong as that day she’d killed all those Reavers - and pulling that image into his mind, he reminded himself that she deserved better than the situation she was in.
Jayne forced himself to walk over. He sat down beside the girl and cleared his throat. She didn’t react, so awkwardly he put a big hand on top of her head.
“Remove phalanges now, ape-man.”
“Girl…”
“That means take your hand off the girl’s head.” She curled a little tighter into herself and shook her head. Jayne just grunted and grabbed her arm, pulling her up next to him. River squawked and unfolded, trying for a moment to fight his grip. But Jayne was too strong and as soon as he felt her body against his he’d put one thick arm around her, drawing her as close as she’d go.
“Stop fidgetin’,” he instructed crossly. “I’m tryin’ t’be comfortin’.”
“You fail.” She was still trembling a little, but she’d stopped crying, which had been his chief goal.
“No, look atcha. You stopped all your snivellin’ didn’t you?” She grabbed onto his t-shirt but didn’t speak. “I got a little brother back home,” he told her gruffly. “Name’s Matty. An’ when he was little, ‘fore I left, he used to get real scared durin’ storms. We had real bad storms on the moon I’m from, an’ Matty always hated ‘em. Ma tried to tell him weren’t nothin’ to worry about, but he was still scared. So whenever I heard ‘im cryin’ I’d go in and we’d hide under his bed. He near ‘bout strangled me sometimes, holdin’ on so tight. So even though I sorta hate you, you’re stayin’ right here, ‘cause feelin’ another body next to you makes some o’ the bad go away.”
River buried her head into his side, her cheek resting on her knee. “You are a good big brother,” she said, almost as though she didn’t want to admit it. “Not as good as Simon, but very satisfactory.”
“Yeah, well don’t go gettin’ it in your feng le little head that I’m gonna be all friendly-like to you. ‘Cause I ain’t.”
“Acceptable.” She’d finally stilled and Jayne felt some of his own worry evaporate. As long as she didn’t go completely bat-shit crazy on him he thought he could handle it. They sat there together for a good hour, silently and motionlessly. River fell asleep for a little while, but there was no way Jayne was letting himself lower his guard with a crazy killer-woman so close and near to his tender bits. If she decided to lose her head again there was no hope for him.
But without the moonbrain to worry over there was absolutely nothing to do. He couldn’t eat because they had to save the food until they really needed it. He didn’t have any of his guns to clean; when they’d gotten away from the men who’d snatched them there hadn’t been time to get the weapons. And if he moved he’d wake her up, which - considering the unstable state of her brain - didn’t seem like a particularly smart thing to do.
Finally he felt the girl stir. “Hey,” he said quietly. “You awake?”
River yawned. “Yes,” she said drearily, her voice thick with sleep, “conscious once more.” She shifted a little and shrugged her shoulders. Taking the hint, Jayne removed his arm. Maybe she’d be able to sit by herself; it didn’t seem like she was going to start crying again. But instead of moving away from him, she only turned so she wouldn’t have to turn her head to look at him. “Stories,” she said. “Tell me more about Matty.”
“What?” Jayne scowled and stretched his legs out in front of him. “No. I told you that bit before on account o’ you was gettin’ close to crazy again. Had to calm you down.”
“You were afraid. Thought the girl might have a fit - didn’t know how to handle it.”
“Well what the hell other reason would I ‘a’ done it? I told you, moonbrain, I don’t like you.”
“Will cry oceans and oceans unless you acquiesce.”
He growled and gave her a fierce look out of the corner of his eye. “You threatenin’ me?”
The girl giggled and gave him a wobbly grin. “Man-called-Jayne is very astute. Now tell the girl a story.”
Well, it wasn’t like there was really anything else to do and if it kept her from trying to kill him or rip his balls off then he didn’t think he could really complain.
“Will you shut up for a while if’n I do?”
“Yes. Silent as a vacuum.”
“As a what?”
“No air. Silent as death?”
“I ain’t got a clue what you’re tryin’ to say, you gorram weirdo. But long as you don’t get all riled up ‘r nothin’ I guess I can tell you somethin’.”
“Very good.” River smoothed down her green skirt over her knees. “Am attentive and alert.”
“Right.” Jayne crossed his arms over his chest and leaned his head back against the wall, trying to think of an appropriate anecdote. “How ‘bout this - you wanna hear the time Matty ‘bout pissed himself talkin’ to Mei Ling Martin?”
~~~
-Story Notes: I didn't mean to start anything new, I really didn't. But I couldn't help it! It's not my fault, I promise. Heh. I was working on my 25 fics - the Rayne fic for turtle_goose specifically. And I was chugging along, happy with what was coming out, and then I looked down, realized I already had 1200 words and I was nowhere near where the steamy fic she'd actually asked for was going to happen. So! Thanks to my propensity for taking a teeny tiny seed and running with it, I now have a new story started. Heh. At the end of everything, I think it'll be about 6 chapters. And the Christmas fic that's in it is in chapter four (tentatively). Well!
I better go finish writing it.
-ILB
***
pre-Rayne
She looked at him through the curtain of her hair, thin fingers picking at the hem of her dress. “Hurts to remember,” she ground out. “Did things to the girl, to all the subjects…” She curled into a tighter ball, whining softly.
“You don’t gotta talk about it, girl.”
“Yes! Will not have you saying… saying things - all untrue! Thinking things about the girl that are wrong, wrong, wrong!”
Jayne felt his own panic rising as hers did, and he was unsure how to handle the girl’s fit. He cleared his throat and tried to ignore his unease. “Jus’ calm down,” he told her awkwardly, not at all used to being comforting. “It’ll be - “
“No!” She scooted quickly away from him, leaning on her side against the grimy, wooden wall. Her hands fisted in her hair and her feet were rubbing together. “You see? You see? Frightened! Panic, unease - the girl causes all of this in you!” She covered her eyes with her arm. “Man-called-Jayne can make it go away, tell himself he doesn’t feel. Girl has no options! Everything! She must feel.” She whimpered, and from the noise he knew she was crying. “Must feel… Must feel.”
A part of Jayne knew that if the situation had been different, he’d ignore her completely. But they were alone and he was as tired and hungry as she was. They’d been stuck alone for a day and a half at least - maybe longer, he couldn’t be certain. Who knew if Serenity was coming back for them; Mal had to know they were missing, but would he decide they were worth returning for? Jayne wouldn’t, he knew, but Mal had proven time and again their values didn’t match.
He wanted to help her, to make her feel better; and even if a large part of that stemmed from his own inability to deal with a hysterical woman, the desire was still there. So he coughed and stood up. She looked so pathetic, curled up and crying. He’d never seen her as strong as that day she’d killed all those Reavers - and pulling that image into his mind, he reminded himself that she deserved better than the situation she was in.
Jayne forced himself to walk over. He sat down beside the girl and cleared his throat. She didn’t react, so awkwardly he put a big hand on top of her head.
“Remove phalanges now, ape-man.”
“Girl…”
“That means take your hand off the girl’s head.” She curled a little tighter into herself and shook her head. Jayne just grunted and grabbed her arm, pulling her up next to him. River squawked and unfolded, trying for a moment to fight his grip. But Jayne was too strong and as soon as he felt her body against his he’d put one thick arm around her, drawing her as close as she’d go.
“Stop fidgetin’,” he instructed crossly. “I’m tryin’ t’be comfortin’.”
“You fail.” She was still trembling a little, but she’d stopped crying, which had been his chief goal.
“No, look atcha. You stopped all your snivellin’ didn’t you?” She grabbed onto his t-shirt but didn’t speak. “I got a little brother back home,” he told her gruffly. “Name’s Matty. An’ when he was little, ‘fore I left, he used to get real scared durin’ storms. We had real bad storms on the moon I’m from, an’ Matty always hated ‘em. Ma tried to tell him weren’t nothin’ to worry about, but he was still scared. So whenever I heard ‘im cryin’ I’d go in and we’d hide under his bed. He near ‘bout strangled me sometimes, holdin’ on so tight. So even though I sorta hate you, you’re stayin’ right here, ‘cause feelin’ another body next to you makes some o’ the bad go away.”
River buried her head into his side, her cheek resting on her knee. “You are a good big brother,” she said, almost as though she didn’t want to admit it. “Not as good as Simon, but very satisfactory.”
“Yeah, well don’t go gettin’ it in your feng le little head that I’m gonna be all friendly-like to you. ‘Cause I ain’t.”
“Acceptable.” She’d finally stilled and Jayne felt some of his own worry evaporate. As long as she didn’t go completely bat-shit crazy on him he thought he could handle it. They sat there together for a good hour, silently and motionlessly. River fell asleep for a little while, but there was no way Jayne was letting himself lower his guard with a crazy killer-woman so close and near to his tender bits. If she decided to lose her head again there was no hope for him.
But without the moonbrain to worry over there was absolutely nothing to do. He couldn’t eat because they had to save the food until they really needed it. He didn’t have any of his guns to clean; when they’d gotten away from the men who’d snatched them there hadn’t been time to get the weapons. And if he moved he’d wake her up, which - considering the unstable state of her brain - didn’t seem like a particularly smart thing to do.
Finally he felt the girl stir. “Hey,” he said quietly. “You awake?”
River yawned. “Yes,” she said drearily, her voice thick with sleep, “conscious once more.” She shifted a little and shrugged her shoulders. Taking the hint, Jayne removed his arm. Maybe she’d be able to sit by herself; it didn’t seem like she was going to start crying again. But instead of moving away from him, she only turned so she wouldn’t have to turn her head to look at him. “Stories,” she said. “Tell me more about Matty.”
“What?” Jayne scowled and stretched his legs out in front of him. “No. I told you that bit before on account o’ you was gettin’ close to crazy again. Had to calm you down.”
“You were afraid. Thought the girl might have a fit - didn’t know how to handle it.”
“Well what the hell other reason would I ‘a’ done it? I told you, moonbrain, I don’t like you.”
“Will cry oceans and oceans unless you acquiesce.”
He growled and gave her a fierce look out of the corner of his eye. “You threatenin’ me?”
The girl giggled and gave him a wobbly grin. “Man-called-Jayne is very astute. Now tell the girl a story.”
Well, it wasn’t like there was really anything else to do and if it kept her from trying to kill him or rip his balls off then he didn’t think he could really complain.
“Will you shut up for a while if’n I do?”
“Yes. Silent as a vacuum.”
“As a what?”
“No air. Silent as death?”
“I ain’t got a clue what you’re tryin’ to say, you gorram weirdo. But long as you don’t get all riled up ‘r nothin’ I guess I can tell you somethin’.”
“Very good.” River smoothed down her green skirt over her knees. “Am attentive and alert.”
“Right.” Jayne crossed his arms over his chest and leaned his head back against the wall, trying to think of an appropriate anecdote. “How ‘bout this - you wanna hear the time Matty ‘bout pissed himself talkin’ to Mei Ling Martin?”
~~~
-Story Notes: I didn't mean to start anything new, I really didn't. But I couldn't help it! It's not my fault, I promise. Heh. I was working on my 25 fics - the Rayne fic for turtle_goose specifically. And I was chugging along, happy with what was coming out, and then I looked down, realized I already had 1200 words and I was nowhere near where the steamy fic she'd actually asked for was going to happen. So! Thanks to my propensity for taking a teeny tiny seed and running with it, I now have a new story started. Heh. At the end of everything, I think it'll be about 6 chapters. And the Christmas fic that's in it is in chapter four (tentatively). Well!
I better go finish writing it.
-ILB
***