An Attitude of Gratitude
Many talk about being thankful on Thanksgiving, it's in the name after all; but I want to be grateful today. The modern definition of grateful is to have a feeling or show appreciation for a kindness; but the word used to mean to accept something with gratitude or to welcome it. I can be thankful for many things, and when I go to bed at night I list five. There are days where my thankfulnesses are as small as the wipers not being stuck to my windshield. Being grateful, welcoming something or accepting it with gratitude is a much harder thing.
This year has been a challenge to have this attitude. No one wants to hear their younger sister needs a pacemaker and that her heart is at least 50% older than she is. It is hard to welcome when the pacemaker is put it that it doesn't hook correctly, and that she will need the surgery over again. I didn't welcome the news that my Dad had a pulmonary embolism and that even with treatment there was still deep strain on his already weak heart and lungs. I resented the news that my joints had deteriorated so greatly they needed to be repaired or replaced -- all 6 of them; this on top of the loss of feeling and muscle control from the Lupus.
No, when the news from any of these things, and several more, came to my doorstep I did not step aside and welcome them in; but in the moment of my greatest need, I was never alone in accepting them. Yes, my sister and her husband were through so much this year, but they have each other, and the family around to support them. Even though I couldn't be with my sister when her heart was worked on, we became closer than we have been in decades. Regardless of what the world throws at us, I have her back and she has mine.
I am grateful for my father's illness and subsequent long hospitalization. Because of his dedicated team, he's in better condition now than he was been in 18 months. He was also able to qualify for services to make his life better which he wasn't quite ill enough to have before. I truly believe in silver linings.
As for me, I live everyday now in wonder. If I can get out of bed, God is good. If I can do things I want, God is good. If I can drive or bake or clean the house or do laundry, God is good. And even if none of those things happen, God is good. Submission has been the greatest gift of my life. I do not need to worry about tomorrow, God will. I am still responsible for doing the things I need to for my health; it's a partnership with my family, growing team of doctors and surgeons, and God to do the best for me; but what will come is not mine to worry over.
So today, I challenge you to be both Thankful and Grateful.
Peace and Cookies,
Amy
This year has been a challenge to have this attitude. No one wants to hear their younger sister needs a pacemaker and that her heart is at least 50% older than she is. It is hard to welcome when the pacemaker is put it that it doesn't hook correctly, and that she will need the surgery over again. I didn't welcome the news that my Dad had a pulmonary embolism and that even with treatment there was still deep strain on his already weak heart and lungs. I resented the news that my joints had deteriorated so greatly they needed to be repaired or replaced -- all 6 of them; this on top of the loss of feeling and muscle control from the Lupus.
No, when the news from any of these things, and several more, came to my doorstep I did not step aside and welcome them in; but in the moment of my greatest need, I was never alone in accepting them. Yes, my sister and her husband were through so much this year, but they have each other, and the family around to support them. Even though I couldn't be with my sister when her heart was worked on, we became closer than we have been in decades. Regardless of what the world throws at us, I have her back and she has mine.
I am grateful for my father's illness and subsequent long hospitalization. Because of his dedicated team, he's in better condition now than he was been in 18 months. He was also able to qualify for services to make his life better which he wasn't quite ill enough to have before. I truly believe in silver linings.
As for me, I live everyday now in wonder. If I can get out of bed, God is good. If I can do things I want, God is good. If I can drive or bake or clean the house or do laundry, God is good. And even if none of those things happen, God is good. Submission has been the greatest gift of my life. I do not need to worry about tomorrow, God will. I am still responsible for doing the things I need to for my health; it's a partnership with my family, growing team of doctors and surgeons, and God to do the best for me; but what will come is not mine to worry over.
So today, I challenge you to be both Thankful and Grateful.
Peace and Cookies,
Amy