Test for sporking
mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman"">One thing that I often hear around the Internets about Twilight is that while it sucks, it is not without the potential to be good and I agree. If Bella was shown to be selfless, empathetic to the plights of all around her, and strong in spirit despite her physical weakness verse being the selfish, weak-willed, horrible twit she actually is, the books would be better. What if Edward’s existence as a superhuman being did actually cause him suffering? His isolation from others could have made him truly lonely. Having to deal with being a square peg that only ever comes up against circle holes could only improve the pretentious tool who thinks humans are garbage. And what if the villains were actually threatening, scary, and interesting? What if the hypocrite Cullen clan was replaced by a fleshed-out supporting cast an audience could root for? How about instead of the extremely co-dependent sick joke that is Bella and Edward’s relationship in the books/movies, there was a romance that was well told and emotional resonant? It could be a love that made both parties stronger, wiser, and more caring. As far as I know, that series was already made by the world-famous Rumiko Takahashi when she penned InuYasha.
I think that pretty much everything Twilight gets horribly, horribly wrong; InuYasha gets right. So of course there are tons of fangirls, without the ability to see the differences, who smash these two things together. One such attempt written by Libra Sorceress called Clashing Cultures: Inuyasha in Forks, enjoy!
mso-themeshade:128">Chapter 1 - Forks
mso-themeshade:128">"Inuyasha, calm down! You didn't have to come," said Kagome despairingly.
color:#0D0D0D;mso-themecolor:text1;mso-themetint:242">“Despairingly?” I see that Libra Sorceress is off to a good start with misusing words in classic SMeyer fashion.
mso-themeshade:128">Inuyasha growled. "As if I was going to let you run off to the other side of the world on your own! Credit me with something."
color:black;mso-themecolor:text1">Knowing InuYasha (the series) as well as I do, it makes sense that InuYasha is there. It’s hinted at that Kagome’s whole family went to Forks. They’ve often treated him like one of the family, so they’d likely be cool with him coming. It also would be like InuYasha to put up the front of going to protect her but really going because he’d miss her too much.
mso-themeshade:128">"I credit you with lots of things," Kagome muttered. "Intelligence is not one of them."
color:black;mso-themecolor:text1">So it’s one step forward and too steps back already! Who the hell is this chick and what has she done with Kagome? Kagome is not snarky or rude. She might be more than willing to call InuYasha out when he’s being dumb in his socially stunted and childish way or yell at him when he’s pissed her off but she has never, ever insulted him like this. Tsundere =/= bitch And why is she even calling him stupid here? Is it stupid that he came to with her to Forks?
mso-themeshade:128">"I heard that!"
mso-themeshade:128">The car pulled into the driveway.
mso-themeshade:128">"Just be nice," Kagome pleaded. "Charlie Swan is one of mum's best friends, and she hasn't seen him since her exchange year here."
color:black;mso-themecolor:text1">Well I guess no badfic is complete without plot devices as flimsy as a floppy disk. While plenty of high schools do exchange their students with ones in Japan, I highly doubt that a high school in a city with a population under 4,000 has a program to do so. But whatever, it matters not that the forces of logic could make masterworks like this collapse like a house of cards.
mso-themeshade:128">"Keh," Inuyasha grumbled. "Fine."
color:black;mso-themecolor:text1">mso-themeshade:128">"Got your hat?"
color:black;mso-themecolor:text1">mso-themeshade:128">"Stupid thing."
color:black;mso-themecolor:text1">color:#0D0D0D;mso-themecolor:text1;mso-themetint:242">You know what, I take it back. It’s stupid that InuYasha is there, he’d need to do more than cover his hanyou ears. He'd have to dress the part. But he would still attract far too much attention in the trip from Japan to America anyway since he has no idea how to act like a normal teenager. Also I really can’t image him sitting still for the 10 plus hours it would take to get there.
color:black;mso-themecolor:text1">mso-themeshade:128">Forks was cold. It was wet. And, above all, it was normal. Very, very normal. At least, that was what it looked like.
color:black;mso-themecolor:text1">mso-themeshade:128">
mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";color:#0D0D0D;mso-themecolor:text1;
mso-themetint:242;mso-bidi-font-style:italic">Was that InuYasha’s thoughts? Did he have an attack of omniscience in that last sentence? Well, Meyer cheats at her narration to make it omniscient more than once, but even she is not that clumsy about it.
color:#0F243E;mso-themecolor:text2;mso-themeshade:128">1 hour later…
color:#0D0D0D;mso-themecolor:text1;mso-themetint:242;mso-bidi-font-weight:bold">Grr! I don’t know about anyone else but I really hate when people put time cards into their story. It just stinks of laziness. Write a damn transition!
mso-themeshade:128">"I can't believe I have to sleep on the couch!" Inuyasha moaned, sitting on Bella's bed.
color:#0D0D0D;mso-themecolor:text1;mso-themetint:242">Two things: A) why is InuYasha complaining about this? He can just wait till everyone goes to bed to sleep in sitting position as he always does.
color:#0D0D0D;mso-themecolor:text1;mso-themetint:242">He doesn’t need to actually sleep on it; he can just pretend he did. B) Why are the Higarushis plus InuYasha at Charlie’s house and not at a motel? I got the impression that the Swan residence only had two rooms. How exactly are Mrs. Higarushi, Grandpa, Souta, Kagome, and InuYasha supposed to fit in there? I guess Charlie could bust out the air mattresses but it would get crazy crowded. Plus, who would put an elderly man on an air mattress or camp bed? This is not a slumber party, camping trailer, or a hotel room at an anime convention. You don’t have a bunch house guests if you have no place to put them.
mso-themeshade:128">Kagome had not met her yet. She was out with her boyfriend, Edward Cullen.
color:#0D0D0D;mso-themecolor:text1;mso-themetint:242">Then why the hell are they just sitting in her room?! Who just hangs out in the bedroom of a complete stranger unless they’re looking to steal something?
mso-themeshade:128">"You've slept on worse," Kagome pointed out, attempting to put up the camp bed, and failing miserably.
color:#0D0D0D;mso-themecolor:text1;mso-themetint:242">He doesn’t “sleep on” anything, he sleeps sitting up.
mso-themeshade:128">"I know! But why can't I just share the room with you?!"
mso-themeshade:128">"Because there's not enough room, and besides, it's inappropriate."
mso-themeshade:128">"It's not like it would be the first time."
mso-themeshade:128">"We're not in the Feudal Era, Inuyasha. mso-themetint:242">But Feudal Era Japanese people still had decorum. You can see it in the freak’n series. Even when the places our heroes slept in did not have separate rooms, most of the time there was a divider to separate Sango, Kagome, and Shippou from Miroku and InuYasha. Boys being in one room and girls being in another would not be a foreign concept to InuYasha.
mso-themeshade:128">This is Forks, and I wasted too much energy giving you the language to screw it up!" color:#0D0D0D;mso-themecolor:text1;mso-themetint:242">Seriously, who is this bitch? Kagome does not burden other people with the suffering she goes through and she certainly does not broadcast it. It’s one of her most admirable qualities.
mso-themeshade:128">Thanks to some instruction from Kaede, the priestess, Kagome had been able to harness her miko powers and literally 'give' Inuyasha her knowledge of how to speak English. Doing so had exhausted her.
color:#0D0D0D;mso-themecolor:text1;mso-themetint:242">What...seriously WHAT!? Miko powers do not do this! They purify, expel evil, create barriers, nullify illusions, return curses, hypnotize, allow a person to see forces in the spiritual realm. ::takes breath:: Complete disregard for canon, how could I expect anything else?mso-themeshade:128">
mso-themeshade:128">"What exactly are you doing anyway?" Inuyasha asked, eyeing the camp bed.
mso-themeshade:128">"Trying to put this thing up!" at her words, the camp bed sprang up and ensnared her ankle.
mso-themeshade:128">"Ow!"
color:#0D0D0D;mso-themecolor:text1;mso-themetint:242">Yeah, this person is clearly not Kagome, since she is neither clumsy nor incapable. And that “sprang up and ensnared her ankle” nonsense if very Bella-like in that the forces of nature have to bend themselves over backwards in order to make her as LOLclumsy as possible.
mso-themeshade:128">"Kagome!" Inuyasha was off the bed in a matter of seconds, springing forward to assist her. She pulled her ankle free and limped over to the bed.
mso-themeshade:128">"How do you do this?" Inuyasha asked, sniffing the camp bed cautiously.
mso-themeshade:128">"Pull it open," Kagome sighed wearily.
mso-themeshade:128">In a matter of seconds, the camp bed was up and functional.
color:#0D0D0D;mso-themecolor:text1;mso-themetint:242">If anyone would have a problem with the camp bed it should be InuYasha. When introduced to a contraption from the modern world he usually unintentionally breaks it.
color:#0D0D0D;mso-themecolor:text1;mso-themetint:242">It’s good that Libra Sorceress is getting both the little and big canon violations in.
mso-themeshade:128">Downstairs, the door opened…
color:#0D0D0D;mso-themecolor:text1;mso-themetint:242">Oh shit, time to hide.
color:#0D0D0D;mso-themecolor:text1;mso-themetint:242">And with that we’re done with chapter one…I would say “yay” but it gets worse. Thank you very much for reading my sporking. Please feel free to share any comment, questions, or concerns you may have.
color:#0D0D0D;mso-themecolor:text1;mso-themetint:242">Until next time ^.^
color:#0D0D0D;mso-themecolor:text1;mso-themetint:242">Love and Peace,
color:#0D0D0D;mso-themecolor:text1;mso-themetint:242">From Ellen