This is a sequel to LAST SONG. I suggest you read last song before reading this. Thanks.
He was lying on the grass, staring at the sky; its soft touch caressing his back. The night was cool and clear; he could almost count the stars up there. Sirius was looking down at him, he was pretty sure, and some of his buddies. It suddenly made him aware; how utterly lonely he felt, even though he wasn't technically alone. His whole body spasm-ed, for some sort of human contact, muscles tensing from want. But he knew loneliness came with the territory. His angel would not come, to lead him to salvation. Suddenly he felt the hairs on neck prickle, and he jumped up, totally scared. The dark shadows on the grass left nothing to imagination. The blue lagoons stared at him blankly, adorable still in its emptiness.
"Dean" Cas called out, his voice soothing. But he didn't feel comforted by his presence. Something was amiss. "Dean don't be scared" his voice was inviting, so different from his usual. Like he was luring a prey; lulling him into a sense of security. Dean stood petrified, unable to move, a tiny grasp left his throat. He slowly took a step back" no". Something in his head screamed as Cas took a step forward, eyes glittering in the darkness. The glint in his eyes defied all angelic code, they were bursting with lust. He cupped Dean's face in one face, leaned in to kiss him, and then without warning shoved his hands in his chest, ripping out his heart. Blood splattered everywhere. Dean kept screaming as he watched blood and his life oozing out of his body. And in the moonlight, he saw him smile.
He woke up with a start, his heart pounding; a velvety fluid ran down his forehead and his chest. He clumsily touched his face, looking for blood; only his sweat met his hands. He was perspiring heavily. Drenched in his own cold sweat, he began to feel a bit foolish. But that feeling didn't last long, once he took in his surrounding. Given he wasn't in some dump old moor , with Castiel ripping out his heart , but was in the lulling security of his own room. But he was still alone, woken up alone; to face the reality. He was a sentimental fool, not even close. Somehow, since his last escapade with the angel; He felt something had changed. He had changed. He was now more than aware, how everyone around him was always leaving him and that included his own brother. He still hasn't been able to put the whole demon blood thing behind him. And there were times, moments, when he felt that he didn't know his brother at all. Not that Sam had given him any reason to feel that way, but there he was. He was painfully aware he must face whatever coming next, all alone. Even with the angel watching over him, he had been insecure. And now, now he didn't even know where he stood with him. One thing was sure. At the risk of sounding like a love struck teen ager , he was irrevocably in love with the angel. If he were a girl, a teen ager , Bella swan , he probably would have kept the feathers of the angel in his diary , and his trench coat too if possible. He would smell the perfume of the angel ,that still lingered in the room. It was different than anything else. He knew it wasn't human., that it didn't belong to Jimmy Novak , Castiel's human vessel. It was something utterly divine. Have you ever smelt the perfume of first rain, on a rose bud? Did you ever had the opportunity to the smell wet earth in June? It was like that, but muskier, better, more intoxicating. It was the perfume that the angel left behind, the night Dean offered himself to him.
The angel, Castiel, the name made him swore loudly as he stepped out of his bed and padded towards the window. The night looked dark, threatening, like never before. It looked fey, like expecting something to happen. Not that it was unusual. To Dean, the night always looked unwelcoming. Some people found it enchanting, mysterious. Not him. For him, it held the key, to all the horrors and nightmares; they had been subjected to, since childhood.
He looked out of the window once again and was once again aware; how silent it all was. His ears, his heart ached to hear the sound of flapping of wings, but none came. He swore once again , as the agonizing pain became unbearable. His face contorted. He looked across the room, in the mirror. And it made him jump. The face that looked back at him wasn't his.
It was a shrunken face that had seen hell. And it reflected the horrors of the underworld. The eyes didn't tell a story. They looked blank , emptiness stared back . There was a nothingness in the abyss , and Dean stared right into it. Suddenly he gave a voiceless scream, noiseless in its pain , so as to not awake Sam sleeping in the next room, picked up a centre piece and threw it at the mirror. The glass broke in thousand shards. Unbelievably, even the mirror was silent. Some of the pieces hit him, making him bleed. And he was grateful for the distraction.
He picked up a large piece, looked closely. It glittered smugly in the moonlight now, defying him. It was almost challenging him, to take a stab at his own self with him. Oh the glass felt so good on his bare skin. He ran his fingers over it, drawing blood. A few drops began to pour out, and fell onto the rug. He laughed inwardly at the pain it caused. Unable to control either of them, he now began to feel it up and down his hand , cutting the places where it ran. The smell blood, and the ache, the maps forming on his arms, began to fascinate him.
He used the piece once again; this time stabbed it in his upper arm. He bit his lower lip , to stop his moans from escaping his mouth. Hurting himself , self mutilating , cutting where it hurt the most , wouldn't probably be enough to heal his aching heart. But it would surely take his mind away from the emptiness he felt inside. He wondered , as he stabbed himself once again , if the angel knew what he was doing and why he was doing it. Was he still as clueless?
Being clueless was the thing that Dean found so endearing, but that was tearing his charge apart. Didn't the god damn angel see what it was doing to him? Where the hell was he? Why was he always AWOL when Dean needed him the most? Dean picked up a larger piece and was about to stab once again when he heard a slight movement in his room. His whole body tensed as he slowly stood up and turned around.
The angel looked angry. He took one look at him , saw the bloody mess, and his face darkened. Outside Dean could hear the sounds of thunders , which had somehow miraculously appeared. Cas moved an inch closer and touched Dean. Dean didn't even notice his hands healing instantly.
Dean knew cas had many question , but he wasn't articulate enough to put them in words. So he just stared at Dean. And Dean stared back unblinkingly. The world seemed to go still at that point as both lost touch with time , space and reality. Slowly the angel touched the human , in the full view of the crescent moon and looked directly into the hazel orbs. He seemed to read them like never before , read not only his mind , but every bit of his soul and existence. Confusion clouded his face , then it got replaced by a pain of its own . Finally a serenity set in.
He looked at Dean , held his face in his both hands , the touch burning Dean. "I am so sorry" he leaned in and kissed him , kissed him like he owned him , like Dean was forever his. Castiel kissed him like he had never kissed anyone , save God perhaps, and somehow he siphoned off a part of himself into Dean. Suddenly Dean didn't feel so empty anymore. His heart was filled with an unexplained joy. His fears and insecurities began to melt away. He pulled Castiel , his angel in his arms , wrapped himself around him , this time knowing , this was meant to be. The angel wasn't going anywhere. He was here to stay. And most importantly, he was his, to kiss, love and claim. He kissed the angel in his neck, touching the nape, fondling with the hair. The angel was all over him , feeling him , inside and out. Suddenly he found both of them in bed , with castiel looming large over him , with the shadows of wings outstretched.
The world dissolved, as he closed his eyes and felt castiel's mouth on his naked body.
THE END ? :D :D :D
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