NO SUBJECT
so i've come to the realization that i really want to be with someone. Like i urn for it, its all i ever think about these days. I use to be so content with being who i am, but clearly who i am isnt good enough. I know you all will disagree but be honest. I know im shy, but that cant be the only thing thats stopping boys...i mean i know people a zillion times more shy then i am that have boyfriends.
i really want to change my appearance in some way, but all i can think of is hair cut and dye..i want to be brunette now, but this red is pushing its way through. I know it sounds horrible that i want to change my appearance, but its not like im talking about plastic surgery so calm.
im just sick of being ignored from the opposite sex, i hate having pretty friends...lmao. JK. its just very hard sometimes, when they get all the attention. It makes me even more self conscious. Just once in my life i want someone i have a crush on to feel the same way, and not like one of my friends better.
another thing i will forever avoid from now on is long distance. Its apparent that for the most part (there are some exceptions i suppose) guys want the physical, and if they cant have it with you then they will go somewhere else. they think with their penis...i get it, if i had a bunch of guys wanting me i would probably do the same thing.
i'm sick of just settling with people that like me, that i dont actually like.
lastly, on a completely different note...im scared of going to cuba alone. Mostly, im scared of flying and the airport in general. I am also scared of being stuck in the hotel, cause i dont do things on my own.
so yeah thats my brain in a nutshell...
i really need to stop reading eclipse, and watching twilight twice in one night an hour apart....haha it makes me sad:P
also, as i was planning jackies bachelorette party i had to give pins out to ppl that said funny sayings on them. Things like too hot, flirty, frisky, vamp, the bad girl, sexy, wild, lucky and came to the conclusion that i am none of these..no wonder i have noone.
i really want to change my appearance in some way, but all i can think of is hair cut and dye..i want to be brunette now, but this red is pushing its way through. I know it sounds horrible that i want to change my appearance, but its not like im talking about plastic surgery so calm.
im just sick of being ignored from the opposite sex, i hate having pretty friends...lmao. JK. its just very hard sometimes, when they get all the attention. It makes me even more self conscious. Just once in my life i want someone i have a crush on to feel the same way, and not like one of my friends better.
another thing i will forever avoid from now on is long distance. Its apparent that for the most part (there are some exceptions i suppose) guys want the physical, and if they cant have it with you then they will go somewhere else. they think with their penis...i get it, if i had a bunch of guys wanting me i would probably do the same thing.
i'm sick of just settling with people that like me, that i dont actually like.
lastly, on a completely different note...im scared of going to cuba alone. Mostly, im scared of flying and the airport in general. I am also scared of being stuck in the hotel, cause i dont do things on my own.
so yeah thats my brain in a nutshell...
i really need to stop reading eclipse, and watching twilight twice in one night an hour apart....haha it makes me sad:P
also, as i was planning jackies bachelorette party i had to give pins out to ppl that said funny sayings on them. Things like too hot, flirty, frisky, vamp, the bad girl, sexy, wild, lucky and came to the conclusion that i am none of these..no wonder i have noone.