starting december
I am intentionally not doing my geometry homework right now. It is typical and if i ever expect things to change maybe I should change my study tactics. I don't know how I did it when I was so sick, I got much better grade and was 10x as busy and 300x as depressed. I am not stupid, but I am not smart either. I am not diligent or committed really either. But I have faith in myself that I will strive to get what I need out of my high school experience even if it's not what was intended. I know that even if I'm not aware of it this blip in my life is going to benefit me, but I feel like I need something that inspires me and tells me that I am getting something now. Maybe I am?
I don't really know, but I know that I am inspired by life and inspired by people and music and voices and the miracle of life and movement and diversity and the way skin smells and getting drunk off of love and friendship and being so in love with living and flowing and being fluid. I am wanting to create endlessly and make and be messy and I'm stifled where I am and I need that music that makes me overflow with honey happiness. I'm tired of being in the confines of outlines and due dates and feeling like I'm hermetically sealed in a plastic jar. I'm listening to a lot of folky oaky stuff that makes fills me up and inspires me and makes me feel like i am just as important and beautiful as anyone else. I was made for all of you and for all of myself. I have to figure it out someday, but right now I am in right now and I can't be in anyone else's head than my own. I am doing what I have to do and I will rise completely from my disorder and shake the self hurt from my wrists and ankles and become colorful and full and beautiful.
I don't really know, but I know that I am inspired by life and inspired by people and music and voices and the miracle of life and movement and diversity and the way skin smells and getting drunk off of love and friendship and being so in love with living and flowing and being fluid. I am wanting to create endlessly and make and be messy and I'm stifled where I am and I need that music that makes me overflow with honey happiness. I'm tired of being in the confines of outlines and due dates and feeling like I'm hermetically sealed in a plastic jar. I'm listening to a lot of folky oaky stuff that makes fills me up and inspires me and makes me feel like i am just as important and beautiful as anyone else. I was made for all of you and for all of myself. I have to figure it out someday, but right now I am in right now and I can't be in anyone else's head than my own. I am doing what I have to do and I will rise completely from my disorder and shake the self hurt from my wrists and ankles and become colorful and full and beautiful.