(no subject)
So I met with my advisor today and was basically told that I shouldn't go to L.A. because it will rape my intellectual mind, and force me to deal with a very club like atmosphere where everyone buys into this product package and nothing substantial gets made. He was like go to London or New York... don't go to L.A.
L.A. is good if you want to be a producer, or are into marketing or even screenwriting. But to be a director i should just make as many films as possible. He admitted that he was one of the few professors that was totally anti-LA. But the thing is he's worked in the industry and he knows industry people and he is basically saying that they steal your soul. And its all ass-kissing and bullshitting. And like i knew that the industry was like this, but at the same time i've never had anyone in it so vehemently tell me to do something different.
And its really daunting because he has these expectations for me to try and work above the usual hollywood style. And break out of the cookie cutter mold of narrative and the western way of thinking of how to tell stories. And make non-commericalized film that isn't experimental but instead is something more and groundbreaking.
On one hand its good to have people holding high-expectations of you. On the other hand it totally sucks because if you can't meet those expectations or you never saw yourself going in that direction, you are kind of fucked. And yes, I can utilize my anthropology/archaeological background, and I can make very smart films if I really put the effort into it. But honestly... Fuck!
So now everything I make for the rest of my time at Emerson has to live up to a standard, because I know that he and my other professors are gonna be watching me. And if I do well, then they'll help me out... if i fall into the traps of other students, I get written off as just another pretentious film student working my way through who will amount to nothing and make crap. And I can put this kind of pressure on myself. But I need to find other kids at Emerson who are willing to make this kind of effort because, film making is a group project. It is contingent upon everyone who is working on it to make it amazing. And from what i've seen so far here, everyone is really busy, everyone makes a lot of films. But they don't make the best films. They dont' tell stories that haven't been told before. They don't try things in new avenues, and a lot of times they don't do their best effort because they say "oh its only for a class" or "oh well this film isn't the best thing anyway."
Long story short I need to figure out my point of view as a director, i need to take a stance. And I need to work from there.