(no subject)

[amorvidacielo]

this is an intense week...because of all of the things that have been going on...i worked today...which i don't normally work during the week...only weekends...it was okay. byron is home and so he has been hanging around with james...its pretty cool because the other day we got to hang out...hes just a wicked fun kid to be around. and then theres ryan...hmmm ryan is uh...lets say...interesting...hes similar to ethan...in a sense that if he is upset about something...he tries to hide it, but fails terribly because he stops talking and sits with his arms crossed...but the other day he got mad at me and said "sometimes it feels like you don't care" and i was thinking..."well, i kind of do, but sometimes actually don't" but i said..."hmm i dont know what to say" . so then what i said was..."listen, I just went through a pretty tough break up...and im still kind of in love with him...but i mean...i like you...it's just ....i need lots of time, and right now, i dont really want a relationship...i just kind of want to have some friends, guys, that i can just hang out with and get to know rather than jump into a relationship with some guy who is totally different than byron." and then he said "well just think about what i said.." i was like okay...im going home...and the lamest part of this whole issue with him is that its so nice out here and all he wants to do is sit in his room playing nintendo or whatever...and im like...im putting on a bathing suit and laying in the sun...and hes like...im going to go in my room shut and lock the door and close the curtains...

im like... youre lame...but i guess hes cool in a way...

alex is also cool and my mom thinks i was flirting with him...which i wasnt...its just the way i am...

but i guess i just want to hang...with guys...naked...

THE END