Moments to remember again and again
She worked a few weeks at the office and I noticed her several times as a lovely, nice and beautiful girl, at first nothing special, like a few others girls or women with the same qualities, at work and in my free time. But what happened that made all the changes to me? I am thinking of it, sitting in my garden, reading a book on which I found it first difficult to concentrate because it reminded me of her (I am reading The captain’s daughter by Alexander Pushkin). Then it suddenly occurred to me. One day I was standing on the stairs at the office not knowing to go up or down. I had to speak to her on an urgent matter about some business and I didn’t know where she was. While I stood there in hesitation, she suddenly appeared below the stairs and I shouted ‘There you are !’ with relieve, and she came up the stairs towards me. I watched her and watched her, smiling at her, since I had this magnificent look in her dress, and perhaps she became aware of that because she didn’t stop looking at me and then her smile appeared, heavenly, meanwhile raising up the stairs, coming to me, nearer and nearer. We were looking at each other, me mostly inside the dress and she didn’t felt bad about it. She enjoyed it and kept smiling at me with that naughty glimpse in her eyes. It became almost dizzy before mine. I had to put myself together to face her in a normal way. She finally came to stand before me, with a happy look in the eyes, a friendly smile as if she was so pleased to talk to me and would agree whatever I suggest. Was my imagination running amok? She was standing there, politely, waiting for my explanation, looking in my eyes, and this moment she belonged to me completely. Didn’t she fell a thing of how my inside going wild? Wasn’t she a bit aware of a tremendous feeling that was growing in me and must have showed something to her. Body language can sometime be so explicit. It made me so difficult to speak and explain what we had to do for the office. She is quite intelligent, so she must have realised that I was off balance because of her. But she didn’t say a thing, instead, she let me try to explain, gave me the time, didn’t interrupt a word, let me find the right sentences, didn’t laughed or grinned at me, just an understanding smile. So much understanding for my situation and letting me completely work it out, not a bit making a fool of me, like most others would do. Why can’t all the girls be like that. The flash of love hit me like an arrow right in the heart. It was definitely something that made an enormous change in me. From a beautiful sight it went to an attractive image that I wanted to keep for myself because love is an outmost selfish feeling. We stood there I don’t know for how long. It ended in any case when another colleague came up the stairs and broke the spell of our moment and made us go our way to our own office. At my office I was glad to sit there for some time, gaining myself but the rest of the day I flew on cloud nine. As I said before, this sort of magical love has hit me only a few times in my life, but it never has hit me harder as that day. I couldn’t sleep for a week, all the clichés that exist on that matter are true: I couldn’t eat, walked with my head in clouds, couldn’t concentrate on nothing, felt stronger as ever, dared things I would ordinary never do like yelling at the heavy boys at the corner of the street (who were surprised to see all my daring and didn’t even tried to answer). Of course that feeling stayed for a few weeks, but every time I saw her, it raised again. This moment is now more than 3 years ago but I remember it so well and it still feels strong inside, her image doesn’t go away. I never dreamed it could linger on for such a long time. So the love must be the truest of them all. A song that comes to my mind thinking of her is Herb Alpert’s classic:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4WZjqdPVaI0