I am the worst at building up my hopes.
Phil always told me that this particular picture was
really good of me.
It was when I had blonde hair.
Well anyway.
To make a semi-long story short,
I dyed my hair the same way again, today.
I felt so pretty.
Like I looked exactly as I did in that photo.
And I was so excited to see the look on Phil's face tonight.
I wanted to 'surprise' him, if you will.
I felt gorgeous.
On top of the world or something.
(Maybe I'm being dramatic.)
Well Phil and I didn't hang out tonight.
Instead we're hanging out really early in the morning.
I'm going to look like shit.
My night and surprise was absolutely ruined.
I'm such a girly cry-baby.
I hate this feeling,
because I know it's not a big deal
but I feel totally crushed.
I need to learn to not sit around and wait for people.
It never works.
I am not myself right now.
I'm just going to stop typing.
Blah.