awake my soul
Title: you told me that i would find a hole within the fragile substance of my soul
Author: amoenavi
Rating: K
Word Count: 502
Pairing/Characters: Damon/Elena
Summary: Damon and Elena and picking up the pieces.
Prompt - Vampire Diaries, Damon/Elena - not worth saving
“So,” he begins. Her head tilts toward him just slightly enough to show she’s listening. He watches her face intently. “You… saved me.” A muscle moves in her cheek, “again," whether it's to smile or to frown... he isn't sure yet. "For the third time."
She frowns minutely. "I've saved you more times than that," she corrects.
The silence feels heavy between them.
He looks down into the center of town. Beneath his feet is the building he almost burned in. With a slow turn, he follows her gaze to the spot where he almost burned tonight. He wishes he could see the rest of her face - know whether it's full of regret or... something else.
“Elena.”
She doesn’t turn.
“Why?”
He doesn’t deserve to ask this of her, not now, not ever, but… he needs to know. Needs to know what exactly about him is worth saving. What illusion he’s managed to make her believe. What soul she seems to think he still has left, however bruised and battered it might be.
“Well,” she hesitates - her eyes flicker toward him for a millisecond before moving onto their next target. The lights of the carnival reflect off of the windows, lighting up even the darkest corners of the square below. “I think we reached our limit on dead brothers." Her small hands clench into fists and all he can feel is an immense void within him. Silent, dark, black hole. This, this is not the other side of the switch. This is not not caring. This is loving. This is feeling her anger and pain on top of his own.
He reaches out to touch her elbow.
He's not surprised when she moves away.
"You're still the man who killed my brother." He flinches but hey, he deserves that. "I can't... not now. I won't forget that, Damon."
"I know."
The last time they were in this square, it was Founder’s Day. He had just tried to help her brother. He was feeling again. He thought she was feeling things back. She’d saved him.
He wonders how exactly they got from there to here.
“It’s ironic, isn’t it?” she says, voice dead and eyes focused on the square. “I couldn't let you die because I love Stefan and you k - killed Jeremy because you love me.”
He stays silent (even though he wants to correct her, tell her that she love him too, tell her that he’s sorry). He owes her that much.
"The scary thing..." swallows, he watches the motion of her throat, "is that... I still. Care. About you. And... I don't know if I would be able to care about... anyone else. Who did that."
And that's a bigger confession than he thought he'd ever get from her.
Her footsteps tap along the rooftop until she reaches the stairs, pushes the door open with a creak. He watches her go. (He's always watching her go.)
"I'm not worth it," he finally answers.
She stops, turns to face him for the first time, brown eyes dark from a distance.
"I know."
Author: amoenavi
Rating: K
Word Count: 502
Pairing/Characters: Damon/Elena
Summary: Damon and Elena and picking up the pieces.
Prompt - Vampire Diaries, Damon/Elena - not worth saving
“So,” he begins. Her head tilts toward him just slightly enough to show she’s listening. He watches her face intently. “You… saved me.” A muscle moves in her cheek, “again," whether it's to smile or to frown... he isn't sure yet. "For the third time."
She frowns minutely. "I've saved you more times than that," she corrects.
The silence feels heavy between them.
He looks down into the center of town. Beneath his feet is the building he almost burned in. With a slow turn, he follows her gaze to the spot where he almost burned tonight. He wishes he could see the rest of her face - know whether it's full of regret or... something else.
“Elena.”
She doesn’t turn.
“Why?”
He doesn’t deserve to ask this of her, not now, not ever, but… he needs to know. Needs to know what exactly about him is worth saving. What illusion he’s managed to make her believe. What soul she seems to think he still has left, however bruised and battered it might be.
“Well,” she hesitates - her eyes flicker toward him for a millisecond before moving onto their next target. The lights of the carnival reflect off of the windows, lighting up even the darkest corners of the square below. “I think we reached our limit on dead brothers." Her small hands clench into fists and all he can feel is an immense void within him. Silent, dark, black hole. This, this is not the other side of the switch. This is not not caring. This is loving. This is feeling her anger and pain on top of his own.
He reaches out to touch her elbow.
He's not surprised when she moves away.
"You're still the man who killed my brother." He flinches but hey, he deserves that. "I can't... not now. I won't forget that, Damon."
"I know."
The last time they were in this square, it was Founder’s Day. He had just tried to help her brother. He was feeling again. He thought she was feeling things back. She’d saved him.
He wonders how exactly they got from there to here.
“It’s ironic, isn’t it?” she says, voice dead and eyes focused on the square. “I couldn't let you die because I love Stefan and you k - killed Jeremy because you love me.”
He stays silent (even though he wants to correct her, tell her that she love him too, tell her that he’s sorry). He owes her that much.
"The scary thing..." swallows, he watches the motion of her throat, "is that... I still. Care. About you. And... I don't know if I would be able to care about... anyone else. Who did that."
And that's a bigger confession than he thought he'd ever get from her.
Her footsteps tap along the rooftop until she reaches the stairs, pushes the door open with a creak. He watches her go. (He's always watching her go.)
"I'm not worth it," he finally answers.
She stops, turns to face him for the first time, brown eyes dark from a distance.
"I know."