(no subject)
So i began moving my belongings to the basement room. It's hard work, seeing as i have a lot of stuff and i have to lug it down stairs. My closet is pretty much empty, except for a few lego things. I have yet to decide where any of my stuff is going to go down there. I mean, i have more space since i have a bedroom, bathroom and living area. So i have plenty of choices. I also have to decide where i want my Andy Warhol print to hang. It's very important to me. He is my favorite artist, but before all those scene kids decided he was cool. Luckily, the thing that they sold at hot topic aren't on sale anymore. They have some of his prints, but that's ok. No more stupid shirts or wallets or notebooks. even though i did buy a wallet, and a tshirt. ><
BUT I AT LEAST KNOW WHO HE WAS AND WHAT HE DID AND SOME HISTORY ON HIM!
at least i have a passion for his work.
When chad gets out of work i'm going over there. I can't wait, really. I know i've seen him every day since i've been back, but it's wonderful.
I watched Martian Child last night. It was really adorable. I could relate to the little boy so well. He was so afraid of people leaving him, that he pretended he was from outer space. It was his escape, his comfort. All he needed was someone to tell him that they would never ever leave him, no matter what. I'm in his shoes. I'm afraid of people leaving me. That's why i worry. That's why i'm insecure. I feel that if i'm not good enough, that people will leave me. I just need someone to tell me that no matter what, they will "never, ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever leave me" no matter what i do. No matter what stupid choices i make, no matter if i say something the wrong way, no matter if i unknowingly hurt them. No matter what, i need to hear that the won't leave me. I need to hear that from Chad. I don't think he'll leave me, but still. That little tiny place of worry won't let me be content until i hear it straight from his mouth that he won't leave me. Actually, now that i think about it, he has said that. He has told me he will never leave me. I guess i just need some more proof. Like a ring. haha.
This has turned into a ramble. I shall go now, and get back to work, or take a nap. whichever comes first.
BUT I AT LEAST KNOW WHO HE WAS AND WHAT HE DID AND SOME HISTORY ON HIM!
at least i have a passion for his work.
When chad gets out of work i'm going over there. I can't wait, really. I know i've seen him every day since i've been back, but it's wonderful.
I watched Martian Child last night. It was really adorable. I could relate to the little boy so well. He was so afraid of people leaving him, that he pretended he was from outer space. It was his escape, his comfort. All he needed was someone to tell him that they would never ever leave him, no matter what. I'm in his shoes. I'm afraid of people leaving me. That's why i worry. That's why i'm insecure. I feel that if i'm not good enough, that people will leave me. I just need someone to tell me that no matter what, they will "never, ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever leave me" no matter what i do. No matter what stupid choices i make, no matter if i say something the wrong way, no matter if i unknowingly hurt them. No matter what, i need to hear that the won't leave me. I need to hear that from Chad. I don't think he'll leave me, but still. That little tiny place of worry won't let me be content until i hear it straight from his mouth that he won't leave me. Actually, now that i think about it, he has said that. He has told me he will never leave me. I guess i just need some more proof. Like a ring. haha.
This has turned into a ramble. I shall go now, and get back to work, or take a nap. whichever comes first.