About Flowers and Bees...
Title: Chérie’s Baby, 3/4: About Flowers and Bees…
Fandom: Kyou Kara Maou
Rating|Genre: pg | family/friendship, slash
Characters|Pairing: Yuuri, Greta, Saralegui, Conrad, Beryes, Shouri, others | Yuuri/Sara
Summary: Yuuri has an unexpected conversation with Greta and remembers an awkward family moment on Earth, before he finally can go to Small Shimaron. As it turns out, some people aren’t too happy about what happens there…
Word count: 4 881
Spoilers|Warnings: No | maybe too much silliness…
Notes: Previous chapters: part 1 | part 2
Yuuri had to accept that he was delayed at the castle until after lunch. Sending a message to Sara to tell him he was coming and packing a few things didn’t take long, but there were a few documents about some pressing matters Gwendal and Günter insisted on making him sign first. He even had to take a very late lunch, after almost everyone else, because of that.
”Yuuri, don’t you think Anissina is just great!?” Greta asked enthusiastically when she met him at the table. Yuuri was used to Greta’s idolization of the red-headed inventor and just hummed something while drinking his juice.
“I mean”, Greta went on, “I’ve got it all figured out now. When I’m grownup, I’m going to marry Beatrice and Anissina can help us make a baby.”
Yuuri choked on his juice and almost spit it out. He coughed and shook his head. Had Greta really said that?! Her innocent eyes beamed at him.
“Greta”, he creaked, “I really think it’s too soon for you to think about marriage and… making babies…”
“That’s not true”, Greta pouted. “It’s not like I’m a baby, Yuuri. I know where babies come from.”
Uh, do I really want to hear this? Yuuri asked himself.
“You do? Who told you?”
“Anissina told me. It’s not like it’s a big secret, is it? When a man and woman love each other very much, like Hube and Nicola, the woman’s fairy godmother plants a baby inside of the woman’s womb, and there it grows for nine months before it comes out. Right, Yuuri?”
“Uh… yeah, that’s right…”
Whew! he thought, Anissina is a bit crazy, but this story is probably good enough for now. I’m so not ready to have a proper flowers-and-bees talk with my daughter… and who knows if I ever will be ready…
That would be just too awkward. He remembered when his mom had tried to have such a conversation with him about two years ago. It wasn’t one of his fondest memories. It had been an ordinary evening after dinner, when his mother, totally out of the blue, said:
“Yuu-chan, your father and I have been thinking… You’re not a little boy anymore - well, you’re always going to be my little boy, but you’re also starting to grow up. So that’s why your father and I feel…”
Yuuri’s father chose that moment to get up from the table, mutter something about having this or that thing to do, and he darted out of the room.
“…Your father feels it better to leave this to me”, Miko went on with a small frown. “Well, it’s better this way, I suppose, because women are better at talking about these things.”
Yuuri had a feeling he knew where this was going and he turned beet red.
“So”, Miko said, “you’re in that age where you start thinking about girls - even if you haven’t told me so, but that’s okay; I know anyway…”
“Mom, come on! You really don’t have to do this!” Shouri stood up so hastily that his chair almost fell over. “It’s bad enough that I had to go through it. Yuu-chan, let’s go upstairs!”
It was an easy choice for Yuuri. He followed his brother and disappeared from their mom’s sight just as quickly as their dad had done a moment ago. They went into Shouri’s room, where the older brother closed the door and sat down on the bed. Yuuri stood awkwardly at the door and looked hesitatingly at him.
”Don’t just stand there”, Yuuri’s big brother said. “Get a chair.”
Shouri’s face was stone-hard with a faint pink hue over his cheeks and earlobes, and Yuuri felt quite sorry for him.
“Mom was trying to talk to you about sex”, Shouri said when Yuuri was sitting. “You understand that, right?”
“Yeah”, Yuuri nodded with a blush. “I get it. Thanks for getting me out of it. And I don’t a lecture about it; it’s not like I’m totally clueless.”
“You know all the, uh… basic stuff?”
“Of course”, Yuuri said and Shouri looked relieved.
“Then I don’t really have to tell you that much. Protection and all that, right? If you want to know anything, find a book. Don’t trust everything you read on the internet, and remember that while you won’t get any STDs from watching porn - which you should do anyway - it might seriously damage your computer and I don’t want to have to deal with that.”
“Okay, Shouri.”
“I guess we’re done here, then”, Shouri said. “And if you ever do need to talk to me about something… I’m here for you, of course…”
Yuuri hadn’t felt that he had any thoughts about the matter that he wanted to share with his brother, and that had been it.
“I’m so glad you have an older brother”, Miko beamed the next time she saw him.
“Yes, mom”, Yuuri had said with genuine feeling. “He’s really good to have around sometimes…”
Now, eating breakfast with his daughter, Yuuri decided that because Greta didn’t have an older sister to save her from embarrassing parent-moments, he just wasn’t ever going to try to put her through something like that. And it wasn’t like he knew more about being an adolescent girl than what his mother had known about being a boy. He was just going to entrust her to the women of the castle and leave it at that. Not that that thought wasn’t scary in its own way…
“So you see”, Greta went on unaware of all his thought, “that’s why Anissina is so smart. You see, Mother Nature - that’s the boss of all those fairy godmothers who make babies - is really picky about some things, like only giving babies to women who are in love with men. But Anissina’s invention made it possible for Lady Chérie to have a baby without a man!”
“I understand”, was all that Yuuri could say. What Greta said was true, after all, aside from that part about the fairy godmothers.
“I wonder, though…” Greta looked thoughtful. “Anissina said it’s really hard work to do that. I wonder if it’s possible to trick the fairy godmothers into believing that one of the women is a man? You know, to dress like a man just like Yozak dresses like a woman?”
Yuuri nearly choked on his juice again. So now Greta wanted to crossdress, too?!
“Um”, he said, “but wouldn’t that mean, theoretically, that Yozak could have a baby with another man if he made the fairy godmothers believe he was a woman?”
This conversation is absurd, he thought. We’re making up alternative theories for a theory that doesn’t even exist…
“No”, Greta said and looked at Yuuri as if he was really slow. “Because only real women have fairy godmothers; Yozak would still have a fairy godfather, and they can’t make babies. Duh!”
“I see.” Yuuri had to smile. “Then, I don’t think crossdressing helps for anyone. These… fairies… keep track of their protégées regardless of what they’re dressed like. You can’t fool them. I guess you’ll just have to rely on Anissina.”
“That’s what she said”, the child replied cheerfully.
“Well then”, Yuuri said. “Shall we go and see if Anissina has something more to teach you today?”
***
It doesn’t matter that we’re both guys, Yuuri thought. Why did I ever think that it did? Yes, he’s a boy, but I like him, and that’s it. Yes. It was the right thing to do to come here.
Finally, Yuuri was where he wanted to be, right by Sara’s side. Sara had been as happy as ever to see him, and he had taken both Yuuri’s hands in his as a way of greeting. He had been smiling widely and his eyes had been shining behind his glasses. All of that was perfectly normal. But Yuuri had been grinning like a fool, nervously seeking some sign in Sara’s face that could tell him if it really meant something. It wasn’t the first time Sara took his hands like that. It was just something he did, maybe out of some reflex; what if he held everybody’s hands like that, what if Yuuri wasn’t that special to him after all?
Yuuri had felt stupid for staring at Sara like that, and he pulled his hands away before he was going to say something stupid.
But Sara just smiled and gestured to the carriage that was going to take them to the castle. All was well. He asked questions about everybody and talked about all the excursions they were going to make to this or that historical site, hot spring or beautiful garden. He made Yuuri talk and feel relaxed, and when several hours had passed and it was time to say goodnight, it almost felt like they had always been together.
But what was the next step? A couple of days had passed, he and Sara had fun and that was great, and now that he was beginning to feel more certain about things, he wanted to move things forward.
“You’re very quiet today”, Sara said, when they were walking in the garden one day after lunch.
“I know”, Yuuri said. “I’m just… trying to figure things out, that’s all.”
Hard to figure this out without talking about it, was it not? But how do you talk about it? How do you ask a boy if he likes you?
“I understand”, Sara said, and looked so gently at him that it made Yuuri’s chest ache.
It made him think about looks. Conrad looked at him very kindly, too, but not… like that. Wolfram often looked at him like ‘You’re mine, and one day I’m going to have my way with you’, but that wasn’t what he thought he saw in Sara’s eyes, exactly…
There were times when Sara looked at him in a way that made him think: ‘If he kisses me now, I don’t think I would resist…’
If Yuuri was completely honest with himself, he knew that the first time he had that thought had been that time when they were hiding from the treacherous guards, pressed so closely together in the darkness…
He hadn’t given such impulses a lot of thoughts in the beginning; being with Sara had just been fun and exciting and he had refused to analyze it. When he carefully nudged that thought he thought that he was going a bit crazy for being affected by another boy like that - was it something in the air in this world? - and Sara was so different from Wolfram that it didn’t seem possible that both of them could want him.
But perhaps it was possible. This sweet, burning sensation in his chest - was it love? Wolfram’s anger and jealousy was always so hot, he was so pushy and harsh that it made Yuuri feel like being a boy’s fiancé meant being owned. And if he sometimes thought about what Wolfram might want to do with him as a lover… well, it made his guts tie into a knot and made him cold all over.
But… it didn’t have to be like that, did it?
“Sara, I like you”, he blurted out.
Saralegui turned his head sharply to look at him, his eyes were wide.
“Yuuri!” A smile slowly spread over his face. “You’re not talking about how good friends we are, are you?”
There’s no going back now, Yuuri thought.
“I… I’m not sure that I want to be your friend, Sara…”
Sara moved a little closer, leaned in to him - Yuuri could smell whatever it was he used to wash his silky hair with - and said:
“Are you flirting with me..?”
“I…” Yuuri gulped and just couldn’t come up with an answer. “Maybe..?”
Yes, it was scary, but not in a bad way exactly. He felt hot and dizzy and wasn’t at all sure about what he was doing. But there was nothing crazy about it. Conrad had been right. This kind of thing was not wrong, because it felt so good…
Sara just smiled, as if he was waiting for Yuuri to keep talking.
Yuuri didn’t know where to go from there.
He moved a little closer to Sara and wished that he could move soundlessly on the gravelled path they were walking on. That way it could look unintentional, as if he just happened to get closer. But was that was he wanted? As if he was a child who didn’t know what he was doing? That had often been his excuse before: ‘I’m just a high school kid; I’m not ready for this!’
He didn’t want to say that anymore.
Yuuri let his hand brush against Sara’s. He wanted more; he wanted to take Sara’s hand in his and hold it, but it was new and unfamiliar territory and it paralyzed him to feel his hands suddenly so full of the will to grab and take and touch and feel…
“Yuuri…” Sara said, “you surprise me…”
His hand wasn’t as shy; it moved to touch him back and Yuuri held back a gasp. Fingers against palm; nothing accidental or innocent about that touch. Yuuri’s skin was tingling, burning.
“Are you not”, Sara said in a low, almost purring voice, “engaged to be married?”
Yuuri took a deep breath.
“But that was a mistake! I never meant to do it! Why doesn’t anybody ever listen to me when I say that? Even you…”
“Yuuri, calm down!”
Sara took his hand in a firm grip and pulled him to a stop. Sara looked him in the eye and Yuuri wondered what it meant, that look on his face. Did he truly think that Yuuri was what Wolfram said, a cheater? But how can you cheat on somebody you never were involved with in the first place?
“It’s just…” Sara seemed to search for words, which was a bit odd. Didn’t he always know just what to say? “It’s just that I want to make sure I’m doing the right thing. Wolfram…”
“But”, Yuuri interrupted, “what do you care about him anyway?”
“You think I have no morals at all?”
There was teasing in Sara’s voice and Yuuri’s anger died away. The other boy squeezed his hand lightly and Yuuri became acutely aware of the skin-to-skin contact again.
“No”, Sara went on, “I know that it isn’t like that between you and him, and that wasn’t really what I meant anyway. And you’re right about Wolfram. There’s one thing I like about him and that’s that he would do anything to protect you…” There was a flicker of that sweet smile on his face again. “But no, I don’t really care about him or his feelings.”
The sweet smile was perhaps hiding something harder; something hard and sad.
“If he were any other man… But he is a prince of Shin Makoku. I would duel with anyone, but challenging him means challenging Shin Makoku. That, after all that we’ve been through, would be…”
His voice died away, and Yuuri felt strangely… alone.
But then he felt Sara’s fingers play with his again, and Sara’s hand began to move up over his arm, up to his shoulder, past his neck - it made Yuuri shiver but again, not in a bad way - and rested on his cheek.
“Do you understand, Yuuri?”
“You… you wouldn’t fight for me?”
Yuuri began to understand, slowly, that what he wanted - what he finally realized with body and soul that he wanted - was dangerous, not for himself but for a whole lot of other people, people who depended on him to protect them.
But all of that seemed so distant, almost unreal. Sara was real, and the vibrant moment.
“Oh, I didn’t say that.” Sara’s voice was a soft, soft whisper. “I don’t back off from a challenge and I don’t mind living dangerously if I have a chance of winning. That’s all I’m asking, Yuuri. Do I really have a chance of winning you?”
“Yes”, Yuuri said without a moment’s hesitation.
He believed that they were going to kiss then, he really believed it, because somehow they had ended up standing unbelievably close to each other, but Sara took a few quick steps away from him and said:
“I can see you, Beryes! Come out of there at once.”
Yuuri felt his jaw drop and he looked around for Beryes but couldn’t see him. It had just never occurred to him that someone could be watching them.
Beryes materialized as if out of thin air, but he had probably been hiding somewhere in the bushes, and he bowed to his nephew and king.
“I lied”, Sara said, “you were hiding well and I couldn’t see you. But I could feel your presence. I do not appreciate you spying on me, Beryes.”
“I apologize”, Beryes said and bowed again. “I didn’t mean to spy. I just want to make sure you are safe. Both of you.”
Sara sighed impatiently.
“I assure you that Yuuri and I don’t need a babysitter. We are in my own palace garden; what could possibly be a threat to us here? Do you have any reason to suspect that we are in any danger?”
Beryes seemed unwilling to answer but couldn’t meet Saralegui’s stare for long.
“No, Your Majesty. I’m sorry. Do you need anything? Shall I send for refreshments?”
“No thank you”, Sara said stiffly, “that won’t be necessary. Please go away somewhere where we can’t see you and, more importantly, where you can’t see us.”
Saralegui’s sworn protector bowed again and proceeded to remove his unwanted presence from their sight.
Once he was gone, Sara took Yuuri’s arm and began walking.
“Sorry about that”, he said, “but he should know that there’s no need to chaperone or supervise me anymore. Some things should only be done in private, don’t you agree?”
“Yes”, Yuuri nodded, and his heart began to beat hard.
“Good”, Sara said and he finally stopped walking and faced Yuuri again. “And you know what? I was getting impatient. If you hadn’t said anything soon, I would have… but I’m glad you did.”
“You have been waiting?” Yuuri said.
“I have, yes.”
Sara put his arms around him, pulled him closer and, finally, they kissed.
***
Conrad just happened to be in the port when the ship arrived, and he stopped to watch the passengers disembark. He was expecting someone to arrive from Small Shimaron, but this someone was not Beryes. Was it not time for Yuuri to return?
The moment he saw the man who was closer than anyone else to King Saralegui - his adviser, his uncle, his bodyguard, and friend - he was overcome with anxiety. What was he doing in Shin Makoku? Had something happened to Yuuri? Why had they not gotten a message from King Saralegui first? Where was Yozak?!
“Beryes.” Conrad bent his head slightly. “What are you doing here? What is wrong?”
The other man met his eyes steadily. He was serious, but not visibly upset. But there must be something… His presence alone was alarming.
“Lord Weller, I believe we have a situation. And before you ask, let me assure you that your young king is in good health and perfectly safe. Or, as safe as he wishes to be.”
“I’m glad to hear that”, Conrad replied with increasing confusion. “But what ‘situation’ are you talking about? It must be serious for you to be here!”
“Yes”, Beryes agreed. “But we can’t talk about it out here.”
Beryes looked like he had eyes in his neck and that they were scanning the surroundings for him. So cautious. And naturally, he couldn’t deliver his important message out there in port.
“Of course.” Conrad gestured to the animals behind him. “I was expecting His Majesty, so I brought his horse. It’s the quickest way to the castle.”
“Thank you”, Beryes said, and instantly began moving to the horses. “It is an honour to ride the Maou’s horse.”
Theoretically, yes, it was. But Beryes sounded like his heart wasn’t in it, like he had other things on his mind.
“Discretion is of outmost importance”, he said as he sat up. “I am relieved that Lord von Bielefeldt was not here to greet his fiancé.”
“Well”, Conrad replied stiffly, “I assure you that he is as capable as I am of keeping secrets!”
His love for his brother was unconditional, but not uncritical; Conrad wouldn’t hesitate to point out Wolfram’s weak points. But to have a stranger from another country say such a thing…
“Forgive me”, Beryes said. “That was not at all what I was implying. But for now, I believe that it’s best to keep this between you and Lord von Voltaire - and the Sage, of course. I hope they are at the castle?”
“Gwendal is, yes. And I’ll send word to the temple immediately.”
There was a palace guard coming out of a tavern, off duty naturally, but Conrad did not hesitate one moment to call him and send him to the temple with a message for Yuuri’s friend to hurry to the castle.
It was a short ride, and he and Beryes did not speak. Anxiety was nagging Conrad’s mind in a way it shouldn’t; he should be able to handle a crisis. But if Yuuri was involved… What in Shinou’s name had the boy gotten himself into this time?
After leaving the horses at the stable, they hurried to Gwendal’s office. Beryes got quite a lot of curious stares along the way, especially from Conrad’s mother who saw them from an open door and called after them:
“Conrad, what’s the hurry? I didn’t know we were expecting a guest. Where are you going, don’t be rude now…”
The last few weeks, she had been getting heavier, and she was experiencing some pain - nothing at all serious, Gisela assured them - that prevented her from running after them the way she usually would have.
Beryes turned around and bowed swiftly.
“I’m sorry”, he said to Conrad, “but I am not sure she needs to hear this now. Of course, if you feel that she should…”
“I don’t even know what this situation is about”, Conrad all but snapped. “I suppose I’ll have to trust jour judgement for now…”
“Sorry”, Beryes replied. “I didn’t mean to be secretive.”
Conrad snorted, and there was the closed door to Gwendal’s office. He opened it without knocking.
Just as expected, he found his older brother at his desk by the window. What surprised him more was to see Yozak stand casually rested against a bookshelf, his arms crossed over his chest in his usual way, that way that made him look so soft and almost elegant despite his muscular appearance.
“Yozak, what are you doing here?” That relaxed posture could be terribly annoying, and now it was downright offensive. “Aren’t you supposed to watch Yuuri’s back while he’s away? In Small Shimaron?”
Yozak met his stare with calm self-assurance.
“Easy, Commander! I was watching Yuuri’s back, but I felt that I should come back here and report the situation in person. Of course I should have realized”, he added, nodding to the man by Conrad’s side, “that I wasn’t the only one to have that thought…”
“So the two of you know about it”, Beryes said. “I’m glad. Then we can talk…”
“Well, I don’t know about it”, Conrad said. “I’d appreciate it if somebody wanted to fill me in.”
“It’s not that bad”, Yozak said. “It seems like our young Maou is having a good time, that’s all.”
“Yozak”, Gwendal said, and there were loads of reproaches in that one word.
“Well, kids will be kids…” Yozak shrugged. “Yes, I know. Sorry, Excellency.” He straightened up and looked at Conrad. “The thing is, it seems like it’s happening, this thing we’ve been suspecting… with Yuuri. He’s having a fling.”
Conrad stared at Yozak. The whole thing suddenly made sense to him. He looked at Beryes who nodded. He looked troubled, conflicted, even, and Conrad could very well imagine his feelings.
The black-haired sage entered the room with a tentative smile, looking a bit flushed as if he had been running. He looked at the men in the room with his usual wide-eyed and open expression. Something about him - he looked so young, so cheerful - made him seem misplaced in Gwendal’s office, but as usual, that impression faded within seconds. The sharp intelligence was never far beneath the surface and Conrad knew he was more than well merited to be in their circle.
“What’s going on?” the boy with the old soul asked. “This is about Shibuya and King Saralegui, isn’t it? Shibuya finally did it?”
“It depends on what you mean by it”, Yozak said. “But of course, he is of age…”
“Yozak!” Gwendal snapped, and the spy shrugged unapologetically.
“Your king and my king are romantically involved”, Beryes confirmed, and the boy simply nodded.
Conrad looked at his older brother; Gwendal’s face was hard and unreadable.
“Lord Weller”, Beryes said, “now, perhaps, you understand my earlier remark about your younger brother. I know that he is fiercely protective of his fiancé. I believe that it is more than possible that he’d want to defend his honour, and the honour of his king. Which, of course, is the same as the honour of this country…”
Silence fell. They all knew what he was saying. And not saying.
Gwendal spoke first:
“I should not have allowed him to go to Small Shimaron.”
There was a load of regrets in Gwendal’s voice, at least to those who knew him well. Beryes frowned as if he suspected the comment to be an insult: ‘bad things happen in Small Shimaron’. And maybe that was part of it, but Conrad guessed there was something else in Gwendal’s thoughts, too: Why do I let the boy get away with things against my better judgement?
“But we cannot keep him in a cage”, Conrad said. “I should have talked to him about it. I… I tried to talk to him about some things right before he left, and I think it got through to him, but…”
“But whatever you said”, Yozak filled in, “it didn’t have the desired effect, had it? Well, if you ask me, it’s practically begging for problems when you value traditions and ceremonies over common sense. Kids shouldn’t be allowed to get engaged, no matter the circumstances.”
“I am inclined to agree”, Beryes said, “but this is hardly the time to debate your customs. I feel that I probably should have talked to Saralegui about getting too close to your Maou… but at the same time…” He sighed. “It is complicated…”
He almost wanted it to happen, Conrad thought. He remembered what Beryes had told him once when they talked about Yuuri and Saralegui: ‘Yuuri is the only one who can save that boy’s heart’… Maybe that’s true, he thought, but to what cost?
“We must separate them”, Gwendal said. “Conrad, you and Yozak are going to get him home, quietly, without alerting Wolfram to the situation, and without making King Saralegui too upset. We don’t want to keep Wolfram from starting a war just to have it from King Saralegui instead.”
“Excuse me”, the sage said, “but if I may add my two cents, I think you’re underestimating Shibuya and Wolfram.”
“What?” Gwendal frowned. “Are you saying that Wolfram would accept this? No. He would start with yelling and screaming and throwing balls of fire around, and then…”
“But he’s not that irresponsible. Yes, of course he’ll be angry when he finds out, but to go as far as to war…”
“You don’t know him like we do”, Gwendal interrupted. “Yes, Wolfram knows what’s best for this country as well as anybody. But if he snaps, if he gets out of control, even if it starts small, it could spread quickly. Yuuri would be caught between them. Which side would he be on?”
“Yuuri”, the black-haired boy said. “Yes, Yuuri is the problem. And the answer.”
“We’re wasting time talking”, Gwendal snapped. “I am sorry, but you are wrong.”
“Wait, Excellency.” Yozak snapped his fingers. “I think he’s is onto something. Yes, our hot-headed young Wolfram is… the way he is, but if the kiddo talks to him before he snaps, if that’s what he would do… As long as he hears it from his ‘fiancé’ first, then maybe it won’t be so bad.”
“My point exactly”, the sage said.
“I think they’re right”, Conrad said. “I think that if we trust in Yuuri and let him handle Wolfram, then it won’t be a problem. I mean, it won’t be such a huge problem. Not a complete disaster, at least.”
“It is possible that can work”, Gwendal admitted. “But you know that Wolfram isn’t the only thing I’m concerned about…”
“We’ll talk about that later”, Conrad said. One problem at the time…
Gwendal nodded and turned to Beryes.
“Then it’s up to you to break the lovebirds apart gently by telling them that Yuuri is needed here”, he said. “Yozak’s going with you to your country to make sure our Maou gets home safely. In the meantime, we’ll try to keep Wolfram in the Bielefeldt territory for a while longer without alarming him.”
Fandom: Kyou Kara Maou
Rating|Genre: pg | family/friendship, slash
Characters|Pairing: Yuuri, Greta, Saralegui, Conrad, Beryes, Shouri, others | Yuuri/Sara
Summary: Yuuri has an unexpected conversation with Greta and remembers an awkward family moment on Earth, before he finally can go to Small Shimaron. As it turns out, some people aren’t too happy about what happens there…
Word count: 4 881
Spoilers|Warnings: No | maybe too much silliness…
Notes: Previous chapters: part 1 | part 2
Yuuri had to accept that he was delayed at the castle until after lunch. Sending a message to Sara to tell him he was coming and packing a few things didn’t take long, but there were a few documents about some pressing matters Gwendal and Günter insisted on making him sign first. He even had to take a very late lunch, after almost everyone else, because of that.
”Yuuri, don’t you think Anissina is just great!?” Greta asked enthusiastically when she met him at the table. Yuuri was used to Greta’s idolization of the red-headed inventor and just hummed something while drinking his juice.
“I mean”, Greta went on, “I’ve got it all figured out now. When I’m grownup, I’m going to marry Beatrice and Anissina can help us make a baby.”
Yuuri choked on his juice and almost spit it out. He coughed and shook his head. Had Greta really said that?! Her innocent eyes beamed at him.
“Greta”, he creaked, “I really think it’s too soon for you to think about marriage and… making babies…”
“That’s not true”, Greta pouted. “It’s not like I’m a baby, Yuuri. I know where babies come from.”
Uh, do I really want to hear this? Yuuri asked himself.
“You do? Who told you?”
“Anissina told me. It’s not like it’s a big secret, is it? When a man and woman love each other very much, like Hube and Nicola, the woman’s fairy godmother plants a baby inside of the woman’s womb, and there it grows for nine months before it comes out. Right, Yuuri?”
“Uh… yeah, that’s right…”
Whew! he thought, Anissina is a bit crazy, but this story is probably good enough for now. I’m so not ready to have a proper flowers-and-bees talk with my daughter… and who knows if I ever will be ready…
That would be just too awkward. He remembered when his mom had tried to have such a conversation with him about two years ago. It wasn’t one of his fondest memories. It had been an ordinary evening after dinner, when his mother, totally out of the blue, said:
“Yuu-chan, your father and I have been thinking… You’re not a little boy anymore - well, you’re always going to be my little boy, but you’re also starting to grow up. So that’s why your father and I feel…”
Yuuri’s father chose that moment to get up from the table, mutter something about having this or that thing to do, and he darted out of the room.
“…Your father feels it better to leave this to me”, Miko went on with a small frown. “Well, it’s better this way, I suppose, because women are better at talking about these things.”
Yuuri had a feeling he knew where this was going and he turned beet red.
“So”, Miko said, “you’re in that age where you start thinking about girls - even if you haven’t told me so, but that’s okay; I know anyway…”
“Mom, come on! You really don’t have to do this!” Shouri stood up so hastily that his chair almost fell over. “It’s bad enough that I had to go through it. Yuu-chan, let’s go upstairs!”
It was an easy choice for Yuuri. He followed his brother and disappeared from their mom’s sight just as quickly as their dad had done a moment ago. They went into Shouri’s room, where the older brother closed the door and sat down on the bed. Yuuri stood awkwardly at the door and looked hesitatingly at him.
”Don’t just stand there”, Yuuri’s big brother said. “Get a chair.”
Shouri’s face was stone-hard with a faint pink hue over his cheeks and earlobes, and Yuuri felt quite sorry for him.
“Mom was trying to talk to you about sex”, Shouri said when Yuuri was sitting. “You understand that, right?”
“Yeah”, Yuuri nodded with a blush. “I get it. Thanks for getting me out of it. And I don’t a lecture about it; it’s not like I’m totally clueless.”
“You know all the, uh… basic stuff?”
“Of course”, Yuuri said and Shouri looked relieved.
“Then I don’t really have to tell you that much. Protection and all that, right? If you want to know anything, find a book. Don’t trust everything you read on the internet, and remember that while you won’t get any STDs from watching porn - which you should do anyway - it might seriously damage your computer and I don’t want to have to deal with that.”
“Okay, Shouri.”
“I guess we’re done here, then”, Shouri said. “And if you ever do need to talk to me about something… I’m here for you, of course…”
Yuuri hadn’t felt that he had any thoughts about the matter that he wanted to share with his brother, and that had been it.
“I’m so glad you have an older brother”, Miko beamed the next time she saw him.
“Yes, mom”, Yuuri had said with genuine feeling. “He’s really good to have around sometimes…”
Now, eating breakfast with his daughter, Yuuri decided that because Greta didn’t have an older sister to save her from embarrassing parent-moments, he just wasn’t ever going to try to put her through something like that. And it wasn’t like he knew more about being an adolescent girl than what his mother had known about being a boy. He was just going to entrust her to the women of the castle and leave it at that. Not that that thought wasn’t scary in its own way…
“So you see”, Greta went on unaware of all his thought, “that’s why Anissina is so smart. You see, Mother Nature - that’s the boss of all those fairy godmothers who make babies - is really picky about some things, like only giving babies to women who are in love with men. But Anissina’s invention made it possible for Lady Chérie to have a baby without a man!”
“I understand”, was all that Yuuri could say. What Greta said was true, after all, aside from that part about the fairy godmothers.
“I wonder, though…” Greta looked thoughtful. “Anissina said it’s really hard work to do that. I wonder if it’s possible to trick the fairy godmothers into believing that one of the women is a man? You know, to dress like a man just like Yozak dresses like a woman?”
Yuuri nearly choked on his juice again. So now Greta wanted to crossdress, too?!
“Um”, he said, “but wouldn’t that mean, theoretically, that Yozak could have a baby with another man if he made the fairy godmothers believe he was a woman?”
This conversation is absurd, he thought. We’re making up alternative theories for a theory that doesn’t even exist…
“No”, Greta said and looked at Yuuri as if he was really slow. “Because only real women have fairy godmothers; Yozak would still have a fairy godfather, and they can’t make babies. Duh!”
“I see.” Yuuri had to smile. “Then, I don’t think crossdressing helps for anyone. These… fairies… keep track of their protégées regardless of what they’re dressed like. You can’t fool them. I guess you’ll just have to rely on Anissina.”
“That’s what she said”, the child replied cheerfully.
“Well then”, Yuuri said. “Shall we go and see if Anissina has something more to teach you today?”
***
It doesn’t matter that we’re both guys, Yuuri thought. Why did I ever think that it did? Yes, he’s a boy, but I like him, and that’s it. Yes. It was the right thing to do to come here.
Finally, Yuuri was where he wanted to be, right by Sara’s side. Sara had been as happy as ever to see him, and he had taken both Yuuri’s hands in his as a way of greeting. He had been smiling widely and his eyes had been shining behind his glasses. All of that was perfectly normal. But Yuuri had been grinning like a fool, nervously seeking some sign in Sara’s face that could tell him if it really meant something. It wasn’t the first time Sara took his hands like that. It was just something he did, maybe out of some reflex; what if he held everybody’s hands like that, what if Yuuri wasn’t that special to him after all?
Yuuri had felt stupid for staring at Sara like that, and he pulled his hands away before he was going to say something stupid.
But Sara just smiled and gestured to the carriage that was going to take them to the castle. All was well. He asked questions about everybody and talked about all the excursions they were going to make to this or that historical site, hot spring or beautiful garden. He made Yuuri talk and feel relaxed, and when several hours had passed and it was time to say goodnight, it almost felt like they had always been together.
But what was the next step? A couple of days had passed, he and Sara had fun and that was great, and now that he was beginning to feel more certain about things, he wanted to move things forward.
“You’re very quiet today”, Sara said, when they were walking in the garden one day after lunch.
“I know”, Yuuri said. “I’m just… trying to figure things out, that’s all.”
Hard to figure this out without talking about it, was it not? But how do you talk about it? How do you ask a boy if he likes you?
“I understand”, Sara said, and looked so gently at him that it made Yuuri’s chest ache.
It made him think about looks. Conrad looked at him very kindly, too, but not… like that. Wolfram often looked at him like ‘You’re mine, and one day I’m going to have my way with you’, but that wasn’t what he thought he saw in Sara’s eyes, exactly…
There were times when Sara looked at him in a way that made him think: ‘If he kisses me now, I don’t think I would resist…’
If Yuuri was completely honest with himself, he knew that the first time he had that thought had been that time when they were hiding from the treacherous guards, pressed so closely together in the darkness…
He hadn’t given such impulses a lot of thoughts in the beginning; being with Sara had just been fun and exciting and he had refused to analyze it. When he carefully nudged that thought he thought that he was going a bit crazy for being affected by another boy like that - was it something in the air in this world? - and Sara was so different from Wolfram that it didn’t seem possible that both of them could want him.
But perhaps it was possible. This sweet, burning sensation in his chest - was it love? Wolfram’s anger and jealousy was always so hot, he was so pushy and harsh that it made Yuuri feel like being a boy’s fiancé meant being owned. And if he sometimes thought about what Wolfram might want to do with him as a lover… well, it made his guts tie into a knot and made him cold all over.
But… it didn’t have to be like that, did it?
“Sara, I like you”, he blurted out.
Saralegui turned his head sharply to look at him, his eyes were wide.
“Yuuri!” A smile slowly spread over his face. “You’re not talking about how good friends we are, are you?”
There’s no going back now, Yuuri thought.
“I… I’m not sure that I want to be your friend, Sara…”
Sara moved a little closer, leaned in to him - Yuuri could smell whatever it was he used to wash his silky hair with - and said:
“Are you flirting with me..?”
“I…” Yuuri gulped and just couldn’t come up with an answer. “Maybe..?”
Yes, it was scary, but not in a bad way exactly. He felt hot and dizzy and wasn’t at all sure about what he was doing. But there was nothing crazy about it. Conrad had been right. This kind of thing was not wrong, because it felt so good…
Sara just smiled, as if he was waiting for Yuuri to keep talking.
Yuuri didn’t know where to go from there.
He moved a little closer to Sara and wished that he could move soundlessly on the gravelled path they were walking on. That way it could look unintentional, as if he just happened to get closer. But was that was he wanted? As if he was a child who didn’t know what he was doing? That had often been his excuse before: ‘I’m just a high school kid; I’m not ready for this!’
He didn’t want to say that anymore.
Yuuri let his hand brush against Sara’s. He wanted more; he wanted to take Sara’s hand in his and hold it, but it was new and unfamiliar territory and it paralyzed him to feel his hands suddenly so full of the will to grab and take and touch and feel…
“Yuuri…” Sara said, “you surprise me…”
His hand wasn’t as shy; it moved to touch him back and Yuuri held back a gasp. Fingers against palm; nothing accidental or innocent about that touch. Yuuri’s skin was tingling, burning.
“Are you not”, Sara said in a low, almost purring voice, “engaged to be married?”
Yuuri took a deep breath.
“But that was a mistake! I never meant to do it! Why doesn’t anybody ever listen to me when I say that? Even you…”
“Yuuri, calm down!”
Sara took his hand in a firm grip and pulled him to a stop. Sara looked him in the eye and Yuuri wondered what it meant, that look on his face. Did he truly think that Yuuri was what Wolfram said, a cheater? But how can you cheat on somebody you never were involved with in the first place?
“It’s just…” Sara seemed to search for words, which was a bit odd. Didn’t he always know just what to say? “It’s just that I want to make sure I’m doing the right thing. Wolfram…”
“But”, Yuuri interrupted, “what do you care about him anyway?”
“You think I have no morals at all?”
There was teasing in Sara’s voice and Yuuri’s anger died away. The other boy squeezed his hand lightly and Yuuri became acutely aware of the skin-to-skin contact again.
“No”, Sara went on, “I know that it isn’t like that between you and him, and that wasn’t really what I meant anyway. And you’re right about Wolfram. There’s one thing I like about him and that’s that he would do anything to protect you…” There was a flicker of that sweet smile on his face again. “But no, I don’t really care about him or his feelings.”
The sweet smile was perhaps hiding something harder; something hard and sad.
“If he were any other man… But he is a prince of Shin Makoku. I would duel with anyone, but challenging him means challenging Shin Makoku. That, after all that we’ve been through, would be…”
His voice died away, and Yuuri felt strangely… alone.
But then he felt Sara’s fingers play with his again, and Sara’s hand began to move up over his arm, up to his shoulder, past his neck - it made Yuuri shiver but again, not in a bad way - and rested on his cheek.
“Do you understand, Yuuri?”
“You… you wouldn’t fight for me?”
Yuuri began to understand, slowly, that what he wanted - what he finally realized with body and soul that he wanted - was dangerous, not for himself but for a whole lot of other people, people who depended on him to protect them.
But all of that seemed so distant, almost unreal. Sara was real, and the vibrant moment.
“Oh, I didn’t say that.” Sara’s voice was a soft, soft whisper. “I don’t back off from a challenge and I don’t mind living dangerously if I have a chance of winning. That’s all I’m asking, Yuuri. Do I really have a chance of winning you?”
“Yes”, Yuuri said without a moment’s hesitation.
He believed that they were going to kiss then, he really believed it, because somehow they had ended up standing unbelievably close to each other, but Sara took a few quick steps away from him and said:
“I can see you, Beryes! Come out of there at once.”
Yuuri felt his jaw drop and he looked around for Beryes but couldn’t see him. It had just never occurred to him that someone could be watching them.
Beryes materialized as if out of thin air, but he had probably been hiding somewhere in the bushes, and he bowed to his nephew and king.
“I lied”, Sara said, “you were hiding well and I couldn’t see you. But I could feel your presence. I do not appreciate you spying on me, Beryes.”
“I apologize”, Beryes said and bowed again. “I didn’t mean to spy. I just want to make sure you are safe. Both of you.”
Sara sighed impatiently.
“I assure you that Yuuri and I don’t need a babysitter. We are in my own palace garden; what could possibly be a threat to us here? Do you have any reason to suspect that we are in any danger?”
Beryes seemed unwilling to answer but couldn’t meet Saralegui’s stare for long.
“No, Your Majesty. I’m sorry. Do you need anything? Shall I send for refreshments?”
“No thank you”, Sara said stiffly, “that won’t be necessary. Please go away somewhere where we can’t see you and, more importantly, where you can’t see us.”
Saralegui’s sworn protector bowed again and proceeded to remove his unwanted presence from their sight.
Once he was gone, Sara took Yuuri’s arm and began walking.
“Sorry about that”, he said, “but he should know that there’s no need to chaperone or supervise me anymore. Some things should only be done in private, don’t you agree?”
“Yes”, Yuuri nodded, and his heart began to beat hard.
“Good”, Sara said and he finally stopped walking and faced Yuuri again. “And you know what? I was getting impatient. If you hadn’t said anything soon, I would have… but I’m glad you did.”
“You have been waiting?” Yuuri said.
“I have, yes.”
Sara put his arms around him, pulled him closer and, finally, they kissed.
***
Conrad just happened to be in the port when the ship arrived, and he stopped to watch the passengers disembark. He was expecting someone to arrive from Small Shimaron, but this someone was not Beryes. Was it not time for Yuuri to return?
The moment he saw the man who was closer than anyone else to King Saralegui - his adviser, his uncle, his bodyguard, and friend - he was overcome with anxiety. What was he doing in Shin Makoku? Had something happened to Yuuri? Why had they not gotten a message from King Saralegui first? Where was Yozak?!
“Beryes.” Conrad bent his head slightly. “What are you doing here? What is wrong?”
The other man met his eyes steadily. He was serious, but not visibly upset. But there must be something… His presence alone was alarming.
“Lord Weller, I believe we have a situation. And before you ask, let me assure you that your young king is in good health and perfectly safe. Or, as safe as he wishes to be.”
“I’m glad to hear that”, Conrad replied with increasing confusion. “But what ‘situation’ are you talking about? It must be serious for you to be here!”
“Yes”, Beryes agreed. “But we can’t talk about it out here.”
Beryes looked like he had eyes in his neck and that they were scanning the surroundings for him. So cautious. And naturally, he couldn’t deliver his important message out there in port.
“Of course.” Conrad gestured to the animals behind him. “I was expecting His Majesty, so I brought his horse. It’s the quickest way to the castle.”
“Thank you”, Beryes said, and instantly began moving to the horses. “It is an honour to ride the Maou’s horse.”
Theoretically, yes, it was. But Beryes sounded like his heart wasn’t in it, like he had other things on his mind.
“Discretion is of outmost importance”, he said as he sat up. “I am relieved that Lord von Bielefeldt was not here to greet his fiancé.”
“Well”, Conrad replied stiffly, “I assure you that he is as capable as I am of keeping secrets!”
His love for his brother was unconditional, but not uncritical; Conrad wouldn’t hesitate to point out Wolfram’s weak points. But to have a stranger from another country say such a thing…
“Forgive me”, Beryes said. “That was not at all what I was implying. But for now, I believe that it’s best to keep this between you and Lord von Voltaire - and the Sage, of course. I hope they are at the castle?”
“Gwendal is, yes. And I’ll send word to the temple immediately.”
There was a palace guard coming out of a tavern, off duty naturally, but Conrad did not hesitate one moment to call him and send him to the temple with a message for Yuuri’s friend to hurry to the castle.
It was a short ride, and he and Beryes did not speak. Anxiety was nagging Conrad’s mind in a way it shouldn’t; he should be able to handle a crisis. But if Yuuri was involved… What in Shinou’s name had the boy gotten himself into this time?
After leaving the horses at the stable, they hurried to Gwendal’s office. Beryes got quite a lot of curious stares along the way, especially from Conrad’s mother who saw them from an open door and called after them:
“Conrad, what’s the hurry? I didn’t know we were expecting a guest. Where are you going, don’t be rude now…”
The last few weeks, she had been getting heavier, and she was experiencing some pain - nothing at all serious, Gisela assured them - that prevented her from running after them the way she usually would have.
Beryes turned around and bowed swiftly.
“I’m sorry”, he said to Conrad, “but I am not sure she needs to hear this now. Of course, if you feel that she should…”
“I don’t even know what this situation is about”, Conrad all but snapped. “I suppose I’ll have to trust jour judgement for now…”
“Sorry”, Beryes replied. “I didn’t mean to be secretive.”
Conrad snorted, and there was the closed door to Gwendal’s office. He opened it without knocking.
Just as expected, he found his older brother at his desk by the window. What surprised him more was to see Yozak stand casually rested against a bookshelf, his arms crossed over his chest in his usual way, that way that made him look so soft and almost elegant despite his muscular appearance.
“Yozak, what are you doing here?” That relaxed posture could be terribly annoying, and now it was downright offensive. “Aren’t you supposed to watch Yuuri’s back while he’s away? In Small Shimaron?”
Yozak met his stare with calm self-assurance.
“Easy, Commander! I was watching Yuuri’s back, but I felt that I should come back here and report the situation in person. Of course I should have realized”, he added, nodding to the man by Conrad’s side, “that I wasn’t the only one to have that thought…”
“So the two of you know about it”, Beryes said. “I’m glad. Then we can talk…”
“Well, I don’t know about it”, Conrad said. “I’d appreciate it if somebody wanted to fill me in.”
“It’s not that bad”, Yozak said. “It seems like our young Maou is having a good time, that’s all.”
“Yozak”, Gwendal said, and there were loads of reproaches in that one word.
“Well, kids will be kids…” Yozak shrugged. “Yes, I know. Sorry, Excellency.” He straightened up and looked at Conrad. “The thing is, it seems like it’s happening, this thing we’ve been suspecting… with Yuuri. He’s having a fling.”
Conrad stared at Yozak. The whole thing suddenly made sense to him. He looked at Beryes who nodded. He looked troubled, conflicted, even, and Conrad could very well imagine his feelings.
The black-haired sage entered the room with a tentative smile, looking a bit flushed as if he had been running. He looked at the men in the room with his usual wide-eyed and open expression. Something about him - he looked so young, so cheerful - made him seem misplaced in Gwendal’s office, but as usual, that impression faded within seconds. The sharp intelligence was never far beneath the surface and Conrad knew he was more than well merited to be in their circle.
“What’s going on?” the boy with the old soul asked. “This is about Shibuya and King Saralegui, isn’t it? Shibuya finally did it?”
“It depends on what you mean by it”, Yozak said. “But of course, he is of age…”
“Yozak!” Gwendal snapped, and the spy shrugged unapologetically.
“Your king and my king are romantically involved”, Beryes confirmed, and the boy simply nodded.
Conrad looked at his older brother; Gwendal’s face was hard and unreadable.
“Lord Weller”, Beryes said, “now, perhaps, you understand my earlier remark about your younger brother. I know that he is fiercely protective of his fiancé. I believe that it is more than possible that he’d want to defend his honour, and the honour of his king. Which, of course, is the same as the honour of this country…”
Silence fell. They all knew what he was saying. And not saying.
Gwendal spoke first:
“I should not have allowed him to go to Small Shimaron.”
There was a load of regrets in Gwendal’s voice, at least to those who knew him well. Beryes frowned as if he suspected the comment to be an insult: ‘bad things happen in Small Shimaron’. And maybe that was part of it, but Conrad guessed there was something else in Gwendal’s thoughts, too: Why do I let the boy get away with things against my better judgement?
“But we cannot keep him in a cage”, Conrad said. “I should have talked to him about it. I… I tried to talk to him about some things right before he left, and I think it got through to him, but…”
“But whatever you said”, Yozak filled in, “it didn’t have the desired effect, had it? Well, if you ask me, it’s practically begging for problems when you value traditions and ceremonies over common sense. Kids shouldn’t be allowed to get engaged, no matter the circumstances.”
“I am inclined to agree”, Beryes said, “but this is hardly the time to debate your customs. I feel that I probably should have talked to Saralegui about getting too close to your Maou… but at the same time…” He sighed. “It is complicated…”
He almost wanted it to happen, Conrad thought. He remembered what Beryes had told him once when they talked about Yuuri and Saralegui: ‘Yuuri is the only one who can save that boy’s heart’… Maybe that’s true, he thought, but to what cost?
“We must separate them”, Gwendal said. “Conrad, you and Yozak are going to get him home, quietly, without alerting Wolfram to the situation, and without making King Saralegui too upset. We don’t want to keep Wolfram from starting a war just to have it from King Saralegui instead.”
“Excuse me”, the sage said, “but if I may add my two cents, I think you’re underestimating Shibuya and Wolfram.”
“What?” Gwendal frowned. “Are you saying that Wolfram would accept this? No. He would start with yelling and screaming and throwing balls of fire around, and then…”
“But he’s not that irresponsible. Yes, of course he’ll be angry when he finds out, but to go as far as to war…”
“You don’t know him like we do”, Gwendal interrupted. “Yes, Wolfram knows what’s best for this country as well as anybody. But if he snaps, if he gets out of control, even if it starts small, it could spread quickly. Yuuri would be caught between them. Which side would he be on?”
“Yuuri”, the black-haired boy said. “Yes, Yuuri is the problem. And the answer.”
“We’re wasting time talking”, Gwendal snapped. “I am sorry, but you are wrong.”
“Wait, Excellency.” Yozak snapped his fingers. “I think he’s is onto something. Yes, our hot-headed young Wolfram is… the way he is, but if the kiddo talks to him before he snaps, if that’s what he would do… As long as he hears it from his ‘fiancé’ first, then maybe it won’t be so bad.”
“My point exactly”, the sage said.
“I think they’re right”, Conrad said. “I think that if we trust in Yuuri and let him handle Wolfram, then it won’t be a problem. I mean, it won’t be such a huge problem. Not a complete disaster, at least.”
“It is possible that can work”, Gwendal admitted. “But you know that Wolfram isn’t the only thing I’m concerned about…”
“We’ll talk about that later”, Conrad said. One problem at the time…
Gwendal nodded and turned to Beryes.
“Then it’s up to you to break the lovebirds apart gently by telling them that Yuuri is needed here”, he said. “Yozak’s going with you to your country to make sure our Maou gets home safely. In the meantime, we’ll try to keep Wolfram in the Bielefeldt territory for a while longer without alarming him.”