Links: Warnings "debate" and Simple Courtesy
The discussion of rape and consent, which was brought back up by cereta's "On rape and men (Oh yes, I'm going there)", followed up on by gabrielleabelle's "Guidelines for Rape Discussions: For Men (and Women...but mainly men)", as well as by her Consent 101 (SERIOUSLY, READ THIS), as well as the Australian newspaper article "Is date rape funny?" that quotes cereta, all led to some insightful discussions.
These also led to HORRIFYINGLY inappropriate and cruel responses to women's stories of their experiences with sexual abuse, assault, harassment, and other traumas.
Shortly thereafter, fandom began discussing whether warnings on fiction, or, as cereta phrased and I liked, LABELS about the content of the fic (wrt fandom, pairing, genre, violence, anything), came up again. And, again, many people responded with, "Ah...not intellectual, but something that can HARM people and went out and put warnings on things where they formerly hadn't done so or considered doing so. I am one of the people who went through my fiction and added "Contains x, y" or "Contains no content to warn for" notes to all the summaries. I doubt I'll always remember, but I'm going to try.
I have triggers from the abuse I've experienced. Some of mine are predictable, most are not. I am very careful about what movies I see. I read spoilers to prepare myself and to decide if I can handle things. I have friends vet movies and TV shows for me. There are shows and movies I do not, have not, and will not ever watch(ed). THAT is my responsibility. I do not believe it is an author's responsibility not to name a character "Jason" because NO ONE can be presciently aware that name is one of my triggers (and it's not something I expect of the world that no one use the name, even if I DO, of my own work, avoid it, including even avoiding using that as my form of address for my two colleagues with that name).
WAY too many folks in fandom have been conflating the idea of someone being triggered (which is HARMFUL, based on that person having been injured) with someone being "squicked" or "annoyed" or simply with not preferring or disliking something. WAY too many folks have been brushing aside the idea of warning for things that can be COMMONLY and EASILY identified as triggering (see above re: HARMFUL TO OTHERS) with the idea that "no one can possibly know all the things to list" (see above re: reasonable expectations, see also below at esorlehcar's post). WAAAAY too many folks have been trying to excuse their position "I don't WANNA WARN because it infringes on my artistic integrity" or "will SPOIL my STORY" as being an EQUIVALENT need/desire to someone's request for a list of contents that will help EVERYONE know whether a story is something they want to read.
I've seen DOZENS of ways to label content now: in "WARNINGS," as a "warnings can be found here[link] if you wish to read them," in a grayed-out portion that can be highlighted or not as per the preference of the reader...we are creative. We are problem solvers. It's what we do. Everyone can find a way to be courteous and thoughtful and considerate and compassionate and balance those basic human behaviors toward REAL people against their artistic desires. And everyone should. And those who say that people should "just not read" or "just not be in fandom" and who want to deny a hobby and an outlet to already-injured people because of their wish not to extend a courtesy...they can bite me.
impertinence very bravely used herself as one example of how it feels and works to be triggered based on having been injured (in her case, imo, tortured at length). If you are able to do so safely, and if you are not sure you understand the mechanism of how triggers impact individuals psychologically and physically--or if you understand it all too well and would like to have a moment of "SOMEONE WHO GETS IT!" it might be worth reading "Sexual Assault, Triggering, and Warnings: An Essay" by impertinence. Warning: Very explicit discussion of sexual assault and the nature, anatomy, cause & effect of triggers. Is itself triggery. (This warning is one that impertinence ASKS be included so that others can choose how to protect themselves if they need to do so.
Anyone who can read this and still think this is an intellectual discussion rather than one about REAL PEOPLE and their REAL HEALTH CONCERNS can also bite me, particularly many of those outlined in esorlehcar's compilation of assholery that was made in response to her brave post and the vicious accusations and derisive dismissals that were leveled
esorlehcar further says, beautifully succinctly: "There's no excuse for responding to sexual assault survivors sharing their stories by calling them liars or attention whores, accusing them of "playing the victim card" or indulging in "victim olympics," or suggesting that if they respond with anger to this type of severe assholery they're clearly just too damaged to be rational. Ever. Doing this is reprehensible, disgusting behavior. Period."
As a parting link, there is, by Gracecourage, this lovely post: On Strength. And Warnings. which makes the distinction between being mentally ill and having been, as so many of us with PTSD and other abuse aftermath problems have been, INJURED. This was DONE TO US. And it's a lovely post that reminds me why I feel dismissed when someone acts like *I* did this or had this innately present, which is not to say that anyone with a mental illness is any more to blame, but it is a DIFFERENCE, and it matters to me.
These also led to HORRIFYINGLY inappropriate and cruel responses to women's stories of their experiences with sexual abuse, assault, harassment, and other traumas.
Shortly thereafter, fandom began discussing whether warnings on fiction, or, as cereta phrased and I liked, LABELS about the content of the fic (wrt fandom, pairing, genre, violence, anything), came up again. And, again, many people responded with, "Ah...not intellectual, but something that can HARM people and went out and put warnings on things where they formerly hadn't done so or considered doing so. I am one of the people who went through my fiction and added "Contains x, y" or "Contains no content to warn for" notes to all the summaries. I doubt I'll always remember, but I'm going to try.
I have triggers from the abuse I've experienced. Some of mine are predictable, most are not. I am very careful about what movies I see. I read spoilers to prepare myself and to decide if I can handle things. I have friends vet movies and TV shows for me. There are shows and movies I do not, have not, and will not ever watch(ed). THAT is my responsibility. I do not believe it is an author's responsibility not to name a character "Jason" because NO ONE can be presciently aware that name is one of my triggers (and it's not something I expect of the world that no one use the name, even if I DO, of my own work, avoid it, including even avoiding using that as my form of address for my two colleagues with that name).
WAY too many folks in fandom have been conflating the idea of someone being triggered (which is HARMFUL, based on that person having been injured) with someone being "squicked" or "annoyed" or simply with not preferring or disliking something. WAY too many folks have been brushing aside the idea of warning for things that can be COMMONLY and EASILY identified as triggering (see above re: HARMFUL TO OTHERS) with the idea that "no one can possibly know all the things to list" (see above re: reasonable expectations, see also below at esorlehcar's post). WAAAAY too many folks have been trying to excuse their position "I don't WANNA WARN because it infringes on my artistic integrity" or "will SPOIL my STORY" as being an EQUIVALENT need/desire to someone's request for a list of contents that will help EVERYONE know whether a story is something they want to read.
I've seen DOZENS of ways to label content now: in "WARNINGS," as a "warnings can be found here[link] if you wish to read them," in a grayed-out portion that can be highlighted or not as per the preference of the reader...we are creative. We are problem solvers. It's what we do. Everyone can find a way to be courteous and thoughtful and considerate and compassionate and balance those basic human behaviors toward REAL people against their artistic desires. And everyone should. And those who say that people should "just not read" or "just not be in fandom" and who want to deny a hobby and an outlet to already-injured people because of their wish not to extend a courtesy...they can bite me.
impertinence very bravely used herself as one example of how it feels and works to be triggered based on having been injured (in her case, imo, tortured at length). If you are able to do so safely, and if you are not sure you understand the mechanism of how triggers impact individuals psychologically and physically--or if you understand it all too well and would like to have a moment of "SOMEONE WHO GETS IT!" it might be worth reading "Sexual Assault, Triggering, and Warnings: An Essay" by impertinence. Warning: Very explicit discussion of sexual assault and the nature, anatomy, cause & effect of triggers. Is itself triggery. (This warning is one that impertinence ASKS be included so that others can choose how to protect themselves if they need to do so.
Anyone who can read this and still think this is an intellectual discussion rather than one about REAL PEOPLE and their REAL HEALTH CONCERNS can also bite me, particularly many of those outlined in esorlehcar's compilation of assholery that was made in response to her brave post and the vicious accusations and derisive dismissals that were leveled
esorlehcar further says, beautifully succinctly: "There's no excuse for responding to sexual assault survivors sharing their stories by calling them liars or attention whores, accusing them of "playing the victim card" or indulging in "victim olympics," or suggesting that if they respond with anger to this type of severe assholery they're clearly just too damaged to be rational. Ever. Doing this is reprehensible, disgusting behavior. Period."
As a parting link, there is, by Gracecourage, this lovely post: On Strength. And Warnings. which makes the distinction between being mentally ill and having been, as so many of us with PTSD and other abuse aftermath problems have been, INJURED. This was DONE TO US. And it's a lovely post that reminds me why I feel dismissed when someone acts like *I* did this or had this innately present, which is not to say that anyone with a mental illness is any more to blame, but it is a DIFFERENCE, and it matters to me.