wooyoung only knows that much; nichkhun/wooyoung
wooyoung only knows that much.
nichkhun/wooyoung; pg; 1249w
where wooyoung knows, but pretends not to and doesn’t know, but pretends he does.
A/N: So there are good things that comes with not having your main computer working. The things you have to do you can't do anymore... and so this happened. It's quick and a little plotless but I've enjoyed writing it and I hope you find some sort of enjoyment reading it (don't know how much cause this is literally angst, heh). Also please keep in your prayer my dying comp, may all my datas recovered safely .____.
They’re fighting again.
Nichkhun and that girl. Wooyoung only knows that much.
It’s not hard to tell. Nichkhun came stumbling right into Wooyoung’s arms, reeking of alcohol, after banging so hard on the door it actually wakes Wooyoung up from his sleep. Wooyoung isn’t usually a light sleeper, but Nichkhun was making too much noise outside. If it wasn’t Wooyoung who woke up and opens his door, his neighbour will.
Before Wooyoung can blink away the sleep in his eyes, they are sitting together side by side on Wooyoung’s bed, Nichkhun is muttering all sorts of stuff Wooyoung does not bother to hear. He is too focused on rubbing Nichkhun’s back gently, too busy relishing Nichkhun’s body heat pressed on his sides. Nichkhun’s head luls to the side to land on Wooyoung’s shoulder, the weight is light enough that Wooyoung doesn’t feel bothered, but the closeness are a little suffocating for his heart. It’s a wonder how he still has that effect on Wooyoung, afterall they’ve been best friends since that once upon a time in primary school where Wooyoung was that transfer students who got picked on, and Nichkhun was the only one bothered standing up for him, even if in the end of the day he ended up sporting the same bruise Wooyoung had. After that much time stretching between then and now, nothing changes.
Maybe something did, Nichkhun has a girlfriend now, tall and beautiful with gorgeous wavy hair, rosy cheeks and fluttering eyelashes Wooyoung will never be.
They love each other.
Nichkhun and that girl. Wooyoung only knows that much.
Who is he lying to? He knows more than that, he knows their history through and through, from courting to now, each time they fight and got back together. Every single time, he tries so hard to tune out the details because he thinks he does not need to know too much about someone else’s love life. That is probably an excuse, because Wooyoung really does not want to hear Nichkhun talk about her. Wooyoung does not care about her, but he cares about Nichkhun, so this, this is how he tries to compromise on the two. In his mind it works perfectly, on execution however, there is some clear loopholes he hasn’t bothered to think about. Like when Nichkhun asked him another question, Wooyoung can only smile in return because he doesn’t know what Nichkhun is currently talking about right now. But Wooyoung knows Nichkhun more than he knows himself, and even though Wooyoung does not read minds, but he knows Nichkhun’s question will most probably be, “What should I do, Wooyoung-ah?”
“You apologize” Wooyoung says almost robotically, trying to ignore the ‘You leave her, she doesn’t deserve you’s and the ‘Leave her and come to me, and you’ll never be sad again’s his heart told him to say. Because Nichkhun is still very perceptive when he is drunk and Wooyoung does not want to risk their friendship over his silly feelings. If he held it in perfectly almost his whole life, then if he tries enough, he can do it for the rest of his whole life. All he had to think of is the way Nichkhun’s face lights up everytime he tells him that they are back together. Love is selfless, Wooyoung tells himself time and time again. Wooyoung’s life has been a journey of convincing himself that loving someone does not always mean having them, it is a little hard, and Wooyoung readily admits that it is a constant struggle, especially in times like these where Nichkhun is most fragile.
Sometimes in times like this Wooyoung wonders if he can make Nichkhun happier than she does. If Nichkhun was his, Wooyoung would do all his might for Nichkhun never to be sad like this. But maybe that is the clear difference, while both of them can make Nichkhun happy, she was the only one Nichkhun will ever be sad about. The only one that determines if Nichkhun’s world is spinning like a ferris wheel or stands still like a broken clock. She’s his source of happiness and sadness, and however much Wooyoung can make Nichkhun happy, in the end of the day those happiness wouldn’t matter to Nichkhun anyway.
Because she is who he loves, and not poor old heartbroken and tattered Jang Wooyoung.
A part of Wooyoung hopes that he can somehow help soothe Nichkhun’s pain, the other part of him wishes Nichkhun would keep hurting, cause at least then he will need Wooyoung enough to stay by his side.
In the end those puppy eyes won over him again. “You apologize” Wooyoung sighs and repeats, more sure this time “I know it isn’t your fault but she thinks it is. I know it’s hard for your pride but you love her enough to do that.”
Nichkhun’s hand reaches to enclose his and squeezes softly, his thumb rubs over the back of Wooyoung’s hand. This isn’t affection, this is gratitude, Wooyoung has to convince himself. Nichkhun’s gaze locks to Wooyoung’s and Wooyoung can see only himself in the reflection of Nichkhun’s eyes. Wooyoung turns around before those brown inviting eyes swallows him whole.
“You are the only one who understands me, Wooyoung-ah.” Nichkhun slurs, hands running up Wooyoung’s arm and cups his cheek gently, thumb rubbing circles on Wooyoung’s cheek. Before Wooyoung himself realize it, he finds himself leaning into Nichkhun’s touch.
“What will I do without you?” Nichkhun said, now so close that his nose bumps lightly against Wooyoung’s cheek, and Wooyoung can feel the tickles of Nichkhun’s eyelashes on the side of his eyes. Wooyoung stills and silently prays Nichkhun couldn’t hear the deafening thump of his beating heart.
“This is why I never wanted to move out of here~” Nichkhun said, Wooyoung couldn’t tell if this is Nichkhun’s real feelings or just something said because his current frustration.
“You know I like you a lot, right?” Wooyoung only smiles wistfully, not daring to look Nichkhun’s way, thoughts running overdrive in his mind.
So you like me enough to want me around, but only as a friend? Or could it be... is this how you truly feel about me?
They said people are the most honest when they are drunk. Wooyoung doesn’t know why he believes this, why he is putting so much hope on this when there is a big chance it is just something fleeting said in midst of Nichkhun’s drunken haze. Maybe Wooyoung is desperate, yes, he must be desperate.
“You.. you can move back here if you want.” Wooyoung blurts out without thinking, but Nichkhun did not answer, and Wooyoung’s mind berates him for being so shameless for trying to seduce someone else’s man.
But when he feels Nichkhun’s lips on his jaw, Wooyoung closes his eyes and wills all his thoughts away.
He knows tomorrow they might make up and get together again.
Nichkhun and that girl. Wooyoung knows that much.
He knows tomorrow he has no chance, so just let himself drown on this feelings just for today, to savour the moment and this closeness, until this happens again.
They will fight again.
Nichkhun and that girl. Wooyoung at least knows this much.
♥
A/N: i think i totally lost what little skills i have in writing, so rusty u.u
nichkhun/wooyoung; pg; 1249w
where wooyoung knows, but pretends not to and doesn’t know, but pretends he does.
A/N: So there are good things that comes with not having your main computer working. The things you have to do you can't do anymore... and so this happened. It's quick and a little plotless but I've enjoyed writing it and I hope you find some sort of enjoyment reading it (don't know how much cause this is literally angst, heh). Also please keep in your prayer my dying comp, may all my datas recovered safely .____.
They’re fighting again.
Nichkhun and that girl. Wooyoung only knows that much.
It’s not hard to tell. Nichkhun came stumbling right into Wooyoung’s arms, reeking of alcohol, after banging so hard on the door it actually wakes Wooyoung up from his sleep. Wooyoung isn’t usually a light sleeper, but Nichkhun was making too much noise outside. If it wasn’t Wooyoung who woke up and opens his door, his neighbour will.
Before Wooyoung can blink away the sleep in his eyes, they are sitting together side by side on Wooyoung’s bed, Nichkhun is muttering all sorts of stuff Wooyoung does not bother to hear. He is too focused on rubbing Nichkhun’s back gently, too busy relishing Nichkhun’s body heat pressed on his sides. Nichkhun’s head luls to the side to land on Wooyoung’s shoulder, the weight is light enough that Wooyoung doesn’t feel bothered, but the closeness are a little suffocating for his heart. It’s a wonder how he still has that effect on Wooyoung, afterall they’ve been best friends since that once upon a time in primary school where Wooyoung was that transfer students who got picked on, and Nichkhun was the only one bothered standing up for him, even if in the end of the day he ended up sporting the same bruise Wooyoung had. After that much time stretching between then and now, nothing changes.
Maybe something did, Nichkhun has a girlfriend now, tall and beautiful with gorgeous wavy hair, rosy cheeks and fluttering eyelashes Wooyoung will never be.
They love each other.
Nichkhun and that girl. Wooyoung only knows that much.
Who is he lying to? He knows more than that, he knows their history through and through, from courting to now, each time they fight and got back together. Every single time, he tries so hard to tune out the details because he thinks he does not need to know too much about someone else’s love life. That is probably an excuse, because Wooyoung really does not want to hear Nichkhun talk about her. Wooyoung does not care about her, but he cares about Nichkhun, so this, this is how he tries to compromise on the two. In his mind it works perfectly, on execution however, there is some clear loopholes he hasn’t bothered to think about. Like when Nichkhun asked him another question, Wooyoung can only smile in return because he doesn’t know what Nichkhun is currently talking about right now. But Wooyoung knows Nichkhun more than he knows himself, and even though Wooyoung does not read minds, but he knows Nichkhun’s question will most probably be, “What should I do, Wooyoung-ah?”
“You apologize” Wooyoung says almost robotically, trying to ignore the ‘You leave her, she doesn’t deserve you’s and the ‘Leave her and come to me, and you’ll never be sad again’s his heart told him to say. Because Nichkhun is still very perceptive when he is drunk and Wooyoung does not want to risk their friendship over his silly feelings. If he held it in perfectly almost his whole life, then if he tries enough, he can do it for the rest of his whole life. All he had to think of is the way Nichkhun’s face lights up everytime he tells him that they are back together. Love is selfless, Wooyoung tells himself time and time again. Wooyoung’s life has been a journey of convincing himself that loving someone does not always mean having them, it is a little hard, and Wooyoung readily admits that it is a constant struggle, especially in times like these where Nichkhun is most fragile.
Sometimes in times like this Wooyoung wonders if he can make Nichkhun happier than she does. If Nichkhun was his, Wooyoung would do all his might for Nichkhun never to be sad like this. But maybe that is the clear difference, while both of them can make Nichkhun happy, she was the only one Nichkhun will ever be sad about. The only one that determines if Nichkhun’s world is spinning like a ferris wheel or stands still like a broken clock. She’s his source of happiness and sadness, and however much Wooyoung can make Nichkhun happy, in the end of the day those happiness wouldn’t matter to Nichkhun anyway.
Because she is who he loves, and not poor old heartbroken and tattered Jang Wooyoung.
A part of Wooyoung hopes that he can somehow help soothe Nichkhun’s pain, the other part of him wishes Nichkhun would keep hurting, cause at least then he will need Wooyoung enough to stay by his side.
In the end those puppy eyes won over him again. “You apologize” Wooyoung sighs and repeats, more sure this time “I know it isn’t your fault but she thinks it is. I know it’s hard for your pride but you love her enough to do that.”
Nichkhun’s hand reaches to enclose his and squeezes softly, his thumb rubs over the back of Wooyoung’s hand. This isn’t affection, this is gratitude, Wooyoung has to convince himself. Nichkhun’s gaze locks to Wooyoung’s and Wooyoung can see only himself in the reflection of Nichkhun’s eyes. Wooyoung turns around before those brown inviting eyes swallows him whole.
“You are the only one who understands me, Wooyoung-ah.” Nichkhun slurs, hands running up Wooyoung’s arm and cups his cheek gently, thumb rubbing circles on Wooyoung’s cheek. Before Wooyoung himself realize it, he finds himself leaning into Nichkhun’s touch.
“What will I do without you?” Nichkhun said, now so close that his nose bumps lightly against Wooyoung’s cheek, and Wooyoung can feel the tickles of Nichkhun’s eyelashes on the side of his eyes. Wooyoung stills and silently prays Nichkhun couldn’t hear the deafening thump of his beating heart.
“This is why I never wanted to move out of here~” Nichkhun said, Wooyoung couldn’t tell if this is Nichkhun’s real feelings or just something said because his current frustration.
“You know I like you a lot, right?” Wooyoung only smiles wistfully, not daring to look Nichkhun’s way, thoughts running overdrive in his mind.
So you like me enough to want me around, but only as a friend? Or could it be... is this how you truly feel about me?
They said people are the most honest when they are drunk. Wooyoung doesn’t know why he believes this, why he is putting so much hope on this when there is a big chance it is just something fleeting said in midst of Nichkhun’s drunken haze. Maybe Wooyoung is desperate, yes, he must be desperate.
“You.. you can move back here if you want.” Wooyoung blurts out without thinking, but Nichkhun did not answer, and Wooyoung’s mind berates him for being so shameless for trying to seduce someone else’s man.
But when he feels Nichkhun’s lips on his jaw, Wooyoung closes his eyes and wills all his thoughts away.
He knows tomorrow they might make up and get together again.
Nichkhun and that girl. Wooyoung knows that much.
He knows tomorrow he has no chance, so just let himself drown on this feelings just for today, to savour the moment and this closeness, until this happens again.
They will fight again.
Nichkhun and that girl. Wooyoung at least knows this much.
♥
A/N: i think i totally lost what little skills i have in writing, so rusty u.u