(no subject)
I just got a full blown apology from Greg. I can't believe it. I'm stunned. I cried when i got off the phone. Over a years worth of pent up anger and frustration has just gone. It was kind of wasted. Why did I care so much? Why do I still love him? Do I even still really love him? Why did I let myself get so hurt in the first place. I've missed him for so long that I'd stopped missing him. We're meeting up when I go back. Getting wasted. I'd quite like that. I don't want to get hurt again though. I don't think I can be hurt like that again. I'm free. I can't wait to go home. I miss Tori so so much and my Mum and Dad. I want things to be back the way they were when I was 17 and Katie was still there. Those were the days. Thinking back I couldn't wait to go to uni, I couldn't wait to grow up and leave and now that I have I miss home more than I ever thought I would. I know that I'm not missing anything that happens because nobody's there but I still wanna be there. I'd hate it more though if I'd stayed at home. Greg is in Scotland hill walking and stuff this weekend and he passed a sign saying Carlisle. Thats probably the only reason why he rang me. He wiped me out of his life so easily. Why couldn't I? I suppose someone can't make you so happy without the other extreme.
I'm gonna be happy. I am happy! This is my chance. I need to seize life and have fun! I'm so lucky.
Fuck yeah. I don't need him to be happy but it helps. I've got the best friends in the world all over the world. Use life Steph! You only get it once!
I'm gonna be happy. I am happy! This is my chance. I need to seize life and have fun! I'm so lucky.
Fuck yeah. I don't need him to be happy but it helps. I've got the best friends in the world all over the world. Use life Steph! You only get it once!