WHCF: Part 1: Hindsight
Title: Where Heroes Come From (1/7)
Rating/Warnings: PG, slight angst, fluff, possible spoilers, slight AU in some parts
Summary: Mother's Day means different things to different people. Even among heroes.
Author's note: So I know Mother's Day has passed, but I felt like I had to write these out. This part takes place in the theoretical aftermath of Children's Crusade from Cassie's POV. There will be more from the other YAs.
Part 1: Hindsight
To say that Cassie resented her mother was... something of an understatement.
After all, it was her mother and step-father who separated her from her real father. After his death she made more of an effort to keep Cassie isolated from the super hero community and all the people she had come to know and love in it. And just when Cassie finally, finally was able to follow in her dad's footsteps, there was her mother to consider. True, she had allowed Cassie to continue with her duties as Stature, but she had never fully accepted it. Cassie suspected part of her never would.
But growing up changed people. Cassie was no exception.
The search for the Scarlet Witch had changed all the Young Avengers, for better and for worse. Becoming an adult meant that you had to be willing to make some sacrifices, that selfishness often resulted in more pain and hurt. It also meant that everything you learned from romance novels about love triangles and tainted romances could never prepare you for the real thing. More importantly, growing up means you have to acknowledge that while miracles happen every once in a while, you shouldn't believe that you'll always get a second change. The people that are in your life today may be gone tomorrow and there's no way of knowing if they'll come back to you again.
Cassie was fortunate. She had her dad back. Her friends were alive. Her family was safe... But in almost losing them all, Cassie could no longer allow herself to take them for granted. Any of them.
She had taken her mother for granted far more than she was able to admit.
Mothers were a pain, sometimes... But Cassie was lucky to even have one. Kate and Teddy would agree. One who worried for her and tried to protect her from the life that ended her father's. Eli and Tommy would envy her in that regard. But all she ever did was fight it, loath the restraint and yell and scream at the perceived injustice of it all until she was hoarse from shouting.
Cassie stood in the kitchen and watched her mother read under the light above the table. One in the morning and she was probably unable to sleep from stress again. Stress, no doubt, Cassie had a hand in forming. She had taken to pouring over books to sooth her wary mind. If it worked, it didn't show. The dark circles under her eyes were indicative of that.
Taking a deep breath, Cassie walked over to her with small hesitant steps.
"Mom..."
Peggy Burdick looked up from her book and frowned. "Cassie?"
Cassie walked closer, and cleared her throat. "Can we talk?"
"Honey," Mrs. Burdick shut her book and sat up with a sigh. "What are you doing up so late?"
"I was... I was thinking about things."
"What kind of things," her mother asked, tired but not uninterested.
Cassie pondered over her words, then answered. "I was thinking about... Well. About Dad."
Her mother's eyes were hard then soft in a moment, but she didn't interrupt. This was... good. Better than arguing, at least. Cassie continued.
"I was thinking about how... How I thought I lost him. For good," she added, shifting a little and brushing a stand of hair back. "And how he came back, but... But-" She bit her lip. Her mother was still watching her, waiting. She hadn't even tried to stop her from speaking once, yet. It was different, for sure. Encouraging, slightly.
"But..." she licked her lips and breathed. "What if he hadn't come back?"
"Cassie-"
"Mom..." she pleaded once and Peggy went silent once more. "It's true. Dad coming back to me was something that probably wouldn't have happened if we didn't know a time traveler. And even then, time travel rarely works out so that you can get what you want. ...And I can't believe I'm talking about time travel right now..."
Cassie laughed slightly, but quieted down when her mother remained unchanged. She coughed and stared at the floor.
"Point is I- I learned something from that. A lot of stuff, actually. And it all boiled down to the people I love. And how easy it is to lose them. ...I don't want to regret the way I've-" She stopped and collected herself, unaware until now how shaky her voice had become. "I don't want the people I love to go without knowing just how much they mean to me ever again."
Her eyes lifted to meet her mother's. She responded to the silent question quietly. "I'm so sorry, Mom... I've been so stupid. I've really been a horrible daughter-"
"No," Peggy cuts in sharply. Cassie bites her lip and waits for the yelling to start.
She didn't expect the hug at all.
Her breath stilled as her mother's face nuzzled into her shoulder. "Mom?"
"No, Cassie.... It was me," Mrs. Burdick answered, gently this time. "I was a horrible mother."
"Mom-"
"I was just so afraid of loosing you," she went one soothingly. "I thought that- that by keeping you away from the Avengers, I would be able to protect you... I thought that if I could just reason with you, that someday you'd understand why I had to keep you away from that influence."
Cassie felt her mother shake in her arms and a wetness on her shoulder. "I was wrong. I just wanted my only baby to be safe... But I hurt you. I made you think you couldn't count on me... What kind of mother does that, let's her child down so much that she can't even trust her to be there when she really needs it?"
Tears stung in Cassie's own eyes as her own arms slowly came up to return the embrace, tighten it. "Oh Mom, no... No you weren't a bad mom. You-" Cassie smiled and squeezed her eyes shut, burying her face into her mother's neck. "You were a good mom. I just couldn't appreciate it until now... I-" She choked back a sob and whispered. "I love you, Mommy."
"Oh, Cassie," her mother pulled back, but only far enough so that she could place her hands on Cassie's cheeks, eyes shinning with tears and with something else Cassie was startled to see. Pride. "I am so proud of you, sweetheart. And I love you more than you could ever imagine. I just hope you can forgive me for not always showing it."
Cassie sniffed and rubbed at her eyes furiously, but the smile on her face felt bigger and brighter then anything she recently smiled over, finding her dad aside. "Only if you can forgive me for being such a brat."
"Now, that is not your fault, really," Mrs. Burdick smiled and kissed her head softly murmuring. "You got that from your Dad."
For the first time in many, many years, the room echoed with their combined laughter. Cassie had almost forgotten what it was like to be able to connect with her mother. She planned on keeping that feeling for as long as she lived.
Rating/Warnings: PG, slight angst, fluff, possible spoilers, slight AU in some parts
Summary: Mother's Day means different things to different people. Even among heroes.
Author's note: So I know Mother's Day has passed, but I felt like I had to write these out. This part takes place in the theoretical aftermath of Children's Crusade from Cassie's POV. There will be more from the other YAs.
Part 1: Hindsight
To say that Cassie resented her mother was... something of an understatement.
After all, it was her mother and step-father who separated her from her real father. After his death she made more of an effort to keep Cassie isolated from the super hero community and all the people she had come to know and love in it. And just when Cassie finally, finally was able to follow in her dad's footsteps, there was her mother to consider. True, she had allowed Cassie to continue with her duties as Stature, but she had never fully accepted it. Cassie suspected part of her never would.
But growing up changed people. Cassie was no exception.
The search for the Scarlet Witch had changed all the Young Avengers, for better and for worse. Becoming an adult meant that you had to be willing to make some sacrifices, that selfishness often resulted in more pain and hurt. It also meant that everything you learned from romance novels about love triangles and tainted romances could never prepare you for the real thing. More importantly, growing up means you have to acknowledge that while miracles happen every once in a while, you shouldn't believe that you'll always get a second change. The people that are in your life today may be gone tomorrow and there's no way of knowing if they'll come back to you again.
Cassie was fortunate. She had her dad back. Her friends were alive. Her family was safe... But in almost losing them all, Cassie could no longer allow herself to take them for granted. Any of them.
She had taken her mother for granted far more than she was able to admit.
Mothers were a pain, sometimes... But Cassie was lucky to even have one. Kate and Teddy would agree. One who worried for her and tried to protect her from the life that ended her father's. Eli and Tommy would envy her in that regard. But all she ever did was fight it, loath the restraint and yell and scream at the perceived injustice of it all until she was hoarse from shouting.
Cassie stood in the kitchen and watched her mother read under the light above the table. One in the morning and she was probably unable to sleep from stress again. Stress, no doubt, Cassie had a hand in forming. She had taken to pouring over books to sooth her wary mind. If it worked, it didn't show. The dark circles under her eyes were indicative of that.
Taking a deep breath, Cassie walked over to her with small hesitant steps.
"Mom..."
Peggy Burdick looked up from her book and frowned. "Cassie?"
Cassie walked closer, and cleared her throat. "Can we talk?"
"Honey," Mrs. Burdick shut her book and sat up with a sigh. "What are you doing up so late?"
"I was... I was thinking about things."
"What kind of things," her mother asked, tired but not uninterested.
Cassie pondered over her words, then answered. "I was thinking about... Well. About Dad."
Her mother's eyes were hard then soft in a moment, but she didn't interrupt. This was... good. Better than arguing, at least. Cassie continued.
"I was thinking about how... How I thought I lost him. For good," she added, shifting a little and brushing a stand of hair back. "And how he came back, but... But-" She bit her lip. Her mother was still watching her, waiting. She hadn't even tried to stop her from speaking once, yet. It was different, for sure. Encouraging, slightly.
"But..." she licked her lips and breathed. "What if he hadn't come back?"
"Cassie-"
"Mom..." she pleaded once and Peggy went silent once more. "It's true. Dad coming back to me was something that probably wouldn't have happened if we didn't know a time traveler. And even then, time travel rarely works out so that you can get what you want. ...And I can't believe I'm talking about time travel right now..."
Cassie laughed slightly, but quieted down when her mother remained unchanged. She coughed and stared at the floor.
"Point is I- I learned something from that. A lot of stuff, actually. And it all boiled down to the people I love. And how easy it is to lose them. ...I don't want to regret the way I've-" She stopped and collected herself, unaware until now how shaky her voice had become. "I don't want the people I love to go without knowing just how much they mean to me ever again."
Her eyes lifted to meet her mother's. She responded to the silent question quietly. "I'm so sorry, Mom... I've been so stupid. I've really been a horrible daughter-"
"No," Peggy cuts in sharply. Cassie bites her lip and waits for the yelling to start.
She didn't expect the hug at all.
Her breath stilled as her mother's face nuzzled into her shoulder. "Mom?"
"No, Cassie.... It was me," Mrs. Burdick answered, gently this time. "I was a horrible mother."
"Mom-"
"I was just so afraid of loosing you," she went one soothingly. "I thought that- that by keeping you away from the Avengers, I would be able to protect you... I thought that if I could just reason with you, that someday you'd understand why I had to keep you away from that influence."
Cassie felt her mother shake in her arms and a wetness on her shoulder. "I was wrong. I just wanted my only baby to be safe... But I hurt you. I made you think you couldn't count on me... What kind of mother does that, let's her child down so much that she can't even trust her to be there when she really needs it?"
Tears stung in Cassie's own eyes as her own arms slowly came up to return the embrace, tighten it. "Oh Mom, no... No you weren't a bad mom. You-" Cassie smiled and squeezed her eyes shut, burying her face into her mother's neck. "You were a good mom. I just couldn't appreciate it until now... I-" She choked back a sob and whispered. "I love you, Mommy."
"Oh, Cassie," her mother pulled back, but only far enough so that she could place her hands on Cassie's cheeks, eyes shinning with tears and with something else Cassie was startled to see. Pride. "I am so proud of you, sweetheart. And I love you more than you could ever imagine. I just hope you can forgive me for not always showing it."
Cassie sniffed and rubbed at her eyes furiously, but the smile on her face felt bigger and brighter then anything she recently smiled over, finding her dad aside. "Only if you can forgive me for being such a brat."
"Now, that is not your fault, really," Mrs. Burdick smiled and kissed her head softly murmuring. "You got that from your Dad."
For the first time in many, many years, the room echoed with their combined laughter. Cassie had almost forgotten what it was like to be able to connect with her mother. She planned on keeping that feeling for as long as she lived.