Title: sweet petals and thrashing thorns
Pairing(s): JB/Jr.
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: So much cheese, I crey.
Synopsis: Jaebum's hopelessly in love with Jinyoung and it feels as if he's fourteen again, drowning in the wrath of first loves.
A/N: Pretty senseless, unbeta-ed
Jaebum wakes up four hours early than usual. It's a Sunday and there's nothing scheduled (for once). Promotions having officially ended eight hours ago. The sun's barely risen, birds still asleep within their nests. Youngjae's singing in his sleep, and the rest of his members are all tucked away in their respective beds. All the world's asleep and Jaebum arises. He takes his time preparing, matching Jinyoung and his laidback personality, slowly contemplating outfits and breakfast. He settles for sweaters and makeshift kimbap, putting whatever leftover food he found between seaweed and rice. The sun's still sleeping and Jaebum's half full, stomach filled with carbohydrates. He hums to himself, mindless tunes, as he fumbles to put on his sneakers-tumbling out into the hallway corridor.
He deems it an adventure, walking seven blocks to the nearest bus stop. He doesn't remember the number of the bus but he figures it only adds to the thrill of exploration. He's the only one there, standing under the illumination of the street light. It's a stage, he thinks, warm spotlight above his head. Except it irks him in all the wrong ways, because he's running away from performances and interviews-attention that suffocates him from time to time. He's tired, repressed, and wanderlust.
The bus comes sixteen minutes later, and he boards onto a nearly empty bus. Because, really, who else was sane enough to board buses five o'clock on a Sunday. It's okay, he reassures himself. I'm special.
Sure, you are. The lights blink to him.
Sure, you are. The door squeals as it closes.
Sure, I am. He repeats.
Nothing's open at the hour and he lays his head on the window, smothering his cheeks upon the glass surface. He doesn't blink, watches as he passes closed doors after closed doors. All the world's asleep and Im Jaebum is going on mindless adventures.
He gets off five right turns later, the soles of his sneakers scraping the asphalt as he jumps onto the ground. The sun is dimly lighting the world and he takes in the sounds of bird waking and gates opening. He settles for a museum, trekking his way through broad stairs as he paces down empty galleries. The security guard eyes him with curiosity but Jaebum only smiles in return.
Art quiets him, travelling through time warps as he slides from one exhibit to the next. He's facing the general of Goryeo when he vaguely hears footsteps and chatter down the hall. He takes it as a sign to retreat, bidding farewells with soldiers, and hops back down the street to find bus stops.
It's not even noon yet when he arrives back at the dorm, lungs full of freedom and adventure. There's coffee on the table, still steaming, and he smiles at the sight. All the world's narcoleptic and Park Jinyoung is smiling at him with dazzling eyes. Settling down onto a chair, Jinyoung's hands find their way to his shoulders, massaging out repressed fatigue.
"Why are you awake?" Jaebum asks, closing his eyes and reclining back in his seat.
"I figured someone would like a welcome-back-coffee." Jinyoung replies, voice sonorous and gentle like always.
He tugs at the younger males hands and pulls him to the seat next to him, resting his head onto the other's shoulder; "Thank you, mother."
"No problem, leader." Jinyoung chuckles, gentle laughter resonating through his bones. And for a moment, it's as if they've travelled back in time. Where it's back to two years ago; the two of them in an empty house, whispering dreams and fairytales in each other's ears. Where JJ Project was still a now, and not a then. Where Jaebum could still pull Jinyoung into a caress and steal the air out of the younger male's lungs without worrying about prying eyes and open ears.
But that was then, and this is now.
So Jaebum listens close for the sound of opening doors and muffled yawns. And when Mark walks out into the living room, he's pulled back into his seat, hands cupped around the base of his mug. Jinyoung's back at the kitchen, placing bread into the toaster. Jaebum feels like a parent more than ever when Youngjae finally wakes up, crashing into his arms and whining to Jinyoung about nightmares and cold blankets. Jaebum soothes out the tangles in his roommate's hair and Jinyoung places toast on the dining table. The rest of the members are fighting over the two bathrooms and Jaebum leans into his chair; enjoying the first sounds of bustling life he's heard all day. Jackson's yelling and Yugyeom's retaliating, it concludes his serendipity and Jaebum gets up to place his mug in the sink. He grazes his fingers past Jinyoung's arm and lingers for a moment too short before he turns on the tap.
The sound of running water floods out background noises and he hums softly to himself-to Jinyoung. Mumbled "I love you's" and slurred "I promise you's" floating in the air. Jaebum's coming home from mindless adventures to open arms and soft smiles.
The next time he goes exploring, it's three o'clock in the morning and he's dragging Jinyoung out of his covers. They spend forever getting ready, laidback at its best, and he remembers to wrap themselves in matching scarves to brace against the autumn wind. They sneak out on tiptoes and run down staircases, falling and stumbling. He forgoes buses this time and opts for long walks under endless street lamps. Fallen leaves rustle under their dance steps and he holds Jinyoung's hand tighter. They're waltzing to inaudible harmonies and heartbeats, embracing and twirling. Jaebum feels young, like he's fourteen again and he's falling too hard into the depths of first love. Jinyoung smells like pumpkin spice lattes and hot chocolate, eyes soft and voice smooth as they hide in the shadows of daybreak. He's tracing sonnets into the younger male's skin and breathing ballads into his lips. He's directing a love story in his mind and Jinyoung holds him until he breaks, crumbling into pieces in the other's hold.
"You're such a hopeless romantic," the Jinhae male whispers into his ear as said romantic pulled him into the back of the bookstore. Jaebum doesn't refute and only continues to show the other all the novel's he's been anticipating. All the ones that talk of stardust and galaxies, soul mates and past lives. He wants to slow dance with Jinyoung through lines of black and white, metaphors and similes.
"You really kill the mood," Jaebum whines when Jinyoung reaches for the copy of Fifty Shades Darker, but really, it's been two years since he's finished the first book and it was too hilarious to pass up. "But this book is hilarious," Jinyoung refutes and ignores glaring eyes, flipping through pages of bad character development and reversed priorities. Jaebum begs to differ but still pays for the novel, throwing it to the bottom of the bag. Jinyoung laughs again, a siren's song, and he intertwines their fingers together. Jaebum doesn't know if Jinyoung is the rose or the thorns. Jinyoung asserts that he's both, leading him in and out of spotlights.
Jaebum's head-over-heels smitten, crashing into sweet petals and thrashing thorns. He bleeds but it's adrenaline and euphoria when Jinyoung licks the froth off his lips. Am I Gil Ra Im or are you Kim Joo Won? Jinyoung finds the thought hilarious and Jaebum wants to kiss all his smiles away, envelop the crinkles at the corner of his eyes and melt into noir irises. Wants Jinyoung to take his heart and keep it for all eternity.
They watch sunrise on playground swings, holding hands and swinging in sync as gold colours them over. All the world's on the brink of waking up and Jaebum's still dreaming; mind hazy and steps light. He's singing in his dreams, self composed tunes and Jinyoung fills in the lyrics. "I can't tell if you're the poison or the antidote," he mumbles as he opens the dorm doors. "I'm both," Jinyoung assures and Jaebum wants to reverse time and relive midnight escapades and moonlight kisses. "You're horrible," he tells him and the other only smiles. "I am."
They keep escaping, disappearing hand in hand, and the next time he kisses Jinyoung on the stairwell, Jackson crashes through the exit door-four more bodies toppling upon him. It's all sorts of horrible and Jinyoung pulls him stealthily back into the dorm, eyes crinkling and lips upturning.
"You're evil," he proclaims.
"You're adorable," the younger male beams with utmost amusement at his rose coloured cheeks and trembling fingers.
Jinyoung kisses him over the dining table and Jackson shields Bam Bam's eyes. Yugyeom looks like a deer caught in headlights and Jaebum doesn't know whether to close or open his eyes. It's horrible, and he's losing leader-like composure. Jinyoung's his first love and he wants to bury himself into the ground when Mark proclaims him to be endearing.
Horrible, he thinks.
Horrible.
Because Yugyeom is chuckling whenever Jinyoung hands him his morning coffee and Youngjae starts hanging Jinyoung's poster in their room. Jaebum's hopelessly in love and all the world's aware of the butterflies that lace his stomach. Jackson puts up "Do Not Disturb" signs when he enters Jinyoung's room, and no one really believes him when he reaffirms that all they do is talk, whispering sweet nothings until sleep takes them over. That they make sure nothing gets out of line. That all he ever wants is to stare into Jinyoung's eyes and shower him with kisses.
The butterflies in his stomach flutter about and he's stuttering incoherent thoughts. Mark is chuckling like he's a moron and Jaebum wants to kick him in the shin, because, shit-he doesn't know Jinyoung's ring size. The saleslady looks just as amused as his bandmate and Jaebum darts his eyes between silver and gold. When he finally picks one, he's pulling out his notebook, flipping to pages and pages of quotes. He doesn't know which one to engrave and Youngjae wasn't any help in decisiveness.
He's tripping over words and syllables when the saleslady finally helps him finish his order. His hands are clammy and Mark stops him from turning the wrong corners three times.
I'm just really bad at this love thing, he thinks to himself.
You are, the elevator dings.
You are, the door hinges creak.
You are, Mark states.
He stays up late composing songs and rehearsing soliloquies, muttering to the poster on the side of his room. You're roses and thorns, poison and antidote, pumpkin spice lattes and hot chocolate. I'm a hopeless romantic and you're horrible, killing the mood and leading me to cliffs. I want to kiss your smile away and I want to melt into your arms
You're horrible, Park Jinyoung.
I want to marry you, Park Jinyoung.
Rehearsals are futile and Jaebum is swallowing his words as he recites foreign syllables. He stutters for a good minute and sings out of tune for the first three lines, but Jinyoung catches him--bracing his fall--as he sings along. He's reaching for the gift box in his pocket, fumbling to open it as he steps down to his knees.
You're horrible, Park Jinyoung.
I want to marry you, Park Jinyoung.
I want to take you on moonlight adventures, dance with you under the falling snow. I want to embrace you at daybreak and kiss you at midnight. Your eyes are noir and I submerge myself in them. Your smiles are suffocating and adrenaline taints my soul when I see them. I want to wake up four hours too early and have you in my arms. Where I can entangle myself unto you. Where you can take my heart, wrap your thorns around it, and keep it for eternity. I want to come home to you.
You're a hopeless romantic, Im Jaebum.
I love you, Im Jaebum.
// End //