A couplet, a rant.
A benevolent God would spare the rod, and all the wrath implied therein,
but why would he, when he can see how much I enjoy this glass of gin?
Went to court this morning. Never saw the judge, but rather, a long line of people doing paperwork. I assumed that I'd be sitting there in a room full of twenty people or so, giving them and the judge my sob story and explaining that I'm in way over my head, throwing myself before the mercy of the court. Instead, I was in and out in less than forty minutes, after signing my name ten different times on ten different papers, and handed a small novel of paperwork pertaining to my alleged (now official) criminal offense against the state of Vermont.
So I've got $656 in court fees, and a payment plan set up of no less than $50/month, but I can opt to get it out of the way sooner if I'm so inclined to do so.
I was informed by a public defender today that the state of Vermont doesn't even have the authority to take away my license! (WTF?!) They do have the right to prohibit me from driving a motor vehicle within the state of Vermont, (which does effectively eliminate 97% of my options). It's officially up to the MVA in Maryland what will become of my driving privileges, and I tried several times today in vain to contact them through the busy signal and muzak. Interestingly enough, Maryland's policy on DUIs is to suspend driving privileges for 45 days, which is half of the penalty imposed upon me here in Vermont. So I guess I'll just have to check back in from time to time and see what the hell is going on.
I found out today that I'll have to take both a bullshit alcohol awareness class of my own expense, and even worse, I have to take out TWO DIFFERENT INSURANCE POLICIES FOR MY CAR IN ORDER TO DRIVE AGAIN. Regular insurance, which will be outrageously high in and of itself, and SR-22 insurance, which is a legal document that keeps close tabs on how I'm keeping up with my car insurance as a "high risk driver". So I think I'd be foolish to assume that I'm going to get back on the road for less than $100/month for at least the next year and a half. And that's a real bitch.
So yeah. All things considered, I'm looking at around $1,000 in fees in order to get my license re-instated, and hefty fines after that. You know what? Yeah. I was drunk, and I drove my car. Hell, I was totally drunk. But I was going about 2/3rds of a mile down a completely empty road in 25 mph zones, and I was stopped FOUR HOUSES DOWN from my destination. I only moved my car in the first place to avoid a $10 parking fine which I felt was out of my budget. I really was fine to drive all things considered, but did not account for the fact that cops will do pretty much anything to keep themselves busy at 1:30am on a Sunday night. Moral of the story: Don't hang shit from your rear-view mirror. It's apparently illegal.
I'm at a very strange place in my life right now, and 90% of the stimuli I receive from the society in which I inhabit is that I am a piece of shit worker drone, with all but insurmountable debts to both the government to which I pay taxes, and private institutions whose services I genuinely regret partaking from. I've gone through the entirety of my young adult life feeling indebted to somebody or another, and it's taken its toll. I mean, fuck. How many roads MUST a man walk down before you can call him a man?! I'm a nice guy. Really. I've never done deliberate harm to fucking anybody, and all I want for my life is to enrich the existential experience of my fellow man through the music I have yet to fully realize.
I went out to lunch with my mom today. We talked for a while about my situation, and my frustrations, and we came to the consensus that yeah, it really fucking sucks. BUT AT LEAST I HAVEN'T GOTTEN ANYBODY PREGNANT. Man, my shit would be OVER. I wouldn't exactly call that the silver lining on the clouds in the veritable shitstorm above me, but I guess I should count my blessings.
So I think that for right now, my first priority is to get the fuck out of debt so that I can spend my own money on the thing I care about most: Making people cum with a guitar in my hands and a microphone at my lips.
And all I can really do is take it one step at a time.
So what, you're never understood?
Big deal, you're doomed to die.
Ooh, nothing ever lasts.
It all gets torn to shreds.
If something's everlasting,
it's over our heads.
It's over our heads.
Think your troubles are so serious,
well one day you'll be so...
long gone, 'cause nothing ever lasts.
It all gets torn to shreds.
If something's everlasting,
it's over our heads.
It's over our heads.
It's over our heads.
but why would he, when he can see how much I enjoy this glass of gin?
Went to court this morning. Never saw the judge, but rather, a long line of people doing paperwork. I assumed that I'd be sitting there in a room full of twenty people or so, giving them and the judge my sob story and explaining that I'm in way over my head, throwing myself before the mercy of the court. Instead, I was in and out in less than forty minutes, after signing my name ten different times on ten different papers, and handed a small novel of paperwork pertaining to my alleged (now official) criminal offense against the state of Vermont.
So I've got $656 in court fees, and a payment plan set up of no less than $50/month, but I can opt to get it out of the way sooner if I'm so inclined to do so.
I was informed by a public defender today that the state of Vermont doesn't even have the authority to take away my license! (WTF?!) They do have the right to prohibit me from driving a motor vehicle within the state of Vermont, (which does effectively eliminate 97% of my options). It's officially up to the MVA in Maryland what will become of my driving privileges, and I tried several times today in vain to contact them through the busy signal and muzak. Interestingly enough, Maryland's policy on DUIs is to suspend driving privileges for 45 days, which is half of the penalty imposed upon me here in Vermont. So I guess I'll just have to check back in from time to time and see what the hell is going on.
I found out today that I'll have to take both a bullshit alcohol awareness class of my own expense, and even worse, I have to take out TWO DIFFERENT INSURANCE POLICIES FOR MY CAR IN ORDER TO DRIVE AGAIN. Regular insurance, which will be outrageously high in and of itself, and SR-22 insurance, which is a legal document that keeps close tabs on how I'm keeping up with my car insurance as a "high risk driver". So I think I'd be foolish to assume that I'm going to get back on the road for less than $100/month for at least the next year and a half. And that's a real bitch.
So yeah. All things considered, I'm looking at around $1,000 in fees in order to get my license re-instated, and hefty fines after that. You know what? Yeah. I was drunk, and I drove my car. Hell, I was totally drunk. But I was going about 2/3rds of a mile down a completely empty road in 25 mph zones, and I was stopped FOUR HOUSES DOWN from my destination. I only moved my car in the first place to avoid a $10 parking fine which I felt was out of my budget. I really was fine to drive all things considered, but did not account for the fact that cops will do pretty much anything to keep themselves busy at 1:30am on a Sunday night. Moral of the story: Don't hang shit from your rear-view mirror. It's apparently illegal.
I'm at a very strange place in my life right now, and 90% of the stimuli I receive from the society in which I inhabit is that I am a piece of shit worker drone, with all but insurmountable debts to both the government to which I pay taxes, and private institutions whose services I genuinely regret partaking from. I've gone through the entirety of my young adult life feeling indebted to somebody or another, and it's taken its toll. I mean, fuck. How many roads MUST a man walk down before you can call him a man?! I'm a nice guy. Really. I've never done deliberate harm to fucking anybody, and all I want for my life is to enrich the existential experience of my fellow man through the music I have yet to fully realize.
I went out to lunch with my mom today. We talked for a while about my situation, and my frustrations, and we came to the consensus that yeah, it really fucking sucks. BUT AT LEAST I HAVEN'T GOTTEN ANYBODY PREGNANT. Man, my shit would be OVER. I wouldn't exactly call that the silver lining on the clouds in the veritable shitstorm above me, but I guess I should count my blessings.
So I think that for right now, my first priority is to get the fuck out of debt so that I can spend my own money on the thing I care about most: Making people cum with a guitar in my hands and a microphone at my lips.
And all I can really do is take it one step at a time.
So what, you're never understood?
Big deal, you're doomed to die.
Ooh, nothing ever lasts.
It all gets torn to shreds.
If something's everlasting,
it's over our heads.
It's over our heads.
Think your troubles are so serious,
well one day you'll be so...
long gone, 'cause nothing ever lasts.
It all gets torn to shreds.
If something's everlasting,
it's over our heads.
It's over our heads.
It's over our heads.