'and i am finally seeing why i was the one worth leaving'
snowed in. the weather reminded me much of my mood on things lately. captivating and fleeting, and yet driving people away, into their homes. a mellow stinging cold, but that one flake on your eyelid doesn't mean much. it melts, but it was always there.
i stayed in tonight and drank wine with my parents and read 'holidays on ice' by david sedaris. my favorite story is the santaland diaries. i laughed so hard i cried. what a terrific book to read on such a night. it really brings to awareness the absurdity of modern americans, in a hysterically, saddening, satirical way.
"It is sad because you would like to believe that everyone is unique and then they disappoint you every time by being exactly the same, asking for the same things, reciting the exact same things as though they have been handed a script."
thank you, my muffin of mercedes.
and i feel like i've been here before, not necessarily this me, but countless people before me and countless me's before the me now. like i've done it all before, and yet i've forgotten.
it all sounds the same what i write in here anyway. maybe that's why. haha.
the winter works, though. like acting like you truly care about someone even when they don't care about you at all and show it and maybe you don't care about them all that much anymore either but you act like you do. or maybe you do.. but it's all you have left with them. that peaceful feeling that comes after so much bitterness.
why do i even bother to talk about it?
the best part about knowing that one day you will be gone is that nobody will miss you.
eva
i stayed in tonight and drank wine with my parents and read 'holidays on ice' by david sedaris. my favorite story is the santaland diaries. i laughed so hard i cried. what a terrific book to read on such a night. it really brings to awareness the absurdity of modern americans, in a hysterically, saddening, satirical way.
"It is sad because you would like to believe that everyone is unique and then they disappoint you every time by being exactly the same, asking for the same things, reciting the exact same things as though they have been handed a script."
thank you, my muffin of mercedes.
and i feel like i've been here before, not necessarily this me, but countless people before me and countless me's before the me now. like i've done it all before, and yet i've forgotten.
it all sounds the same what i write in here anyway. maybe that's why. haha.
the winter works, though. like acting like you truly care about someone even when they don't care about you at all and show it and maybe you don't care about them all that much anymore either but you act like you do. or maybe you do.. but it's all you have left with them. that peaceful feeling that comes after so much bitterness.
why do i even bother to talk about it?
the best part about knowing that one day you will be gone is that nobody will miss you.
eva