(no subject)
wow wat a day 2day has been
i woke up this morin by my mom comin n2 my bedroom @ 8 wakin me up which pissed me off b/c well u dont wake me ^ until im ready expecailly if i didnt go 2 sleep til like 5 n the morin b/c i couldnt fall asleep but she was n a good mood so that made me relaxe bout it... then my dad was n a pisy moom but he normally is so i didnt think nething bout it.. my mom took us 2 the libarary im a nerd but i love goin 2 the libarary...lol then she took us 2 the west mall which was fun we just looked round and i tryied 2 get a applaction 4 a job but most of the places werent takin them or they wont hire 15 year olds...how gay im forced 2 get a job and i cant find 1... 4 reall...but it was still fun just good time w/ my mom and my siblings... ((big surpirse)) kc earned 86 dollars babysittin on new years and she bought us all lunch..i got a foot long sandwhich from subway..YUM! *rub belly* lol then we went 2 wal*mart and bought some things and it was really sad b/c my mom had 2 take things out of the chart b/c we cant afford them b/c my dad moved us all up here 4 work @ a job that pays him NOTHING! and its just sad 2 c that... my mom is bein real tough and im proud of her! i wanted 2 cry though...its just sad 2 watch my family go through this and all.....ooooooh yeah my mom got stopped b/c the speed limit is gay ^ here and u have 2 drive like grandma's or something and she was goin 50 n a 40... she has 2 pay $90....which we dont have....*sigh* i dont understand this move @ all
while i was @ the mall i was thinkin b/c wen i shop or walk i think and i was thinkin bout y my birth-mom left me and i remember how i use 2 go visit her every other weekend and had fun most of the time and i remembered how she nvited me 2 go live w/ her and how i turned her down and told her i couldnt leave my mom((kris my step-mom IS MY MOM!)) and dad and after that was wen she stoped treatin me the same and turned on me and started 2 4get that i am her daughter also... so it was my fault that she left... *sigh* seems that a lot of things that happed w/ her was my fault...
and i was also thinkin bout how and y im scared of fallin n love and gettin married and havin kids wen i get older and i figured it out...its b/c after all that i have been through w/ my birth mom and my dad and their divorce and all that and all i went through w/ my dad's anger and bein hit and all and i relised the reason y im scared 4 that is b/c i dont 2 put my kids through all that i have been through and i dont want 2 hurt them b/c i have my dad's anger and its said that wat a person was put through as a kid all they do is pass it down through generations and alll that AND I DONT WAT 2 DO THAT...
does ne of that make sense..i hate wen i have time 2 think...all i do is depress myself
and also i thought bout how i feel like i have changed here and i feel like im not the person i use 2 b or that i want 2 b and i wish things would just go bak 2 wat i am use 2...
more later...theres a survery
amber
O N E
-- Name: Amber Horth
-- Birthday: September 3,1989
-- Current Location: bedroom
-- Eye Color: hazel blue
-- Hair Color: dirty blonde
-- Height: 5' 3
-- Righty Or Lefty: right.
T W O
-- Your Heritage: irish canadian
-- The Shoes You Wore Today: my fav. my pink n white dc's
-- Your Weakness: holdin my feelings nside or my dad's anger
-- Your Fears: clowns
-- Goal You Would Like To Achieve This Year: try n b happy where i am
T H R E E
-- Your Most Overused Phrase(s): yeah ur done...
-- Your Thoughts First Waking Up: here goes another useless day
-- Your Best Physical Feature: i know 2 different answers 4 that and neither i like so no answer
-- Your Bedtime: 10
-- Your Most Missed Memory: LCCG
F O U R
-- Pepsi Or Coke: coke
-- McDonald's Or Burger King: mcdonalds
-- Single Or Group Dates: both..just depending on what time and whats going on and stuff
-- Lipton Ice tea Or Nestea: nestea
-- Chocolate Or Vanilla: chocolate
-- Cappuccino Or Coffee: cappuccino
F I V E
Do You...
-- Sing: yeah
-- Take A Shower: yes..
-- Want To Go To College: yeah i cant wait i want 2 get out on my own
-- Like High School: Hell yah i did now i have 2 get use 2 a whole new 1 but i hope i like it just as much
i woke up this morin by my mom comin n2 my bedroom @ 8 wakin me up which pissed me off b/c well u dont wake me ^ until im ready expecailly if i didnt go 2 sleep til like 5 n the morin b/c i couldnt fall asleep but she was n a good mood so that made me relaxe bout it... then my dad was n a pisy moom but he normally is so i didnt think nething bout it.. my mom took us 2 the libarary im a nerd but i love goin 2 the libarary...lol then she took us 2 the west mall which was fun we just looked round and i tryied 2 get a applaction 4 a job but most of the places werent takin them or they wont hire 15 year olds...how gay im forced 2 get a job and i cant find 1... 4 reall...but it was still fun just good time w/ my mom and my siblings... ((big surpirse)) kc earned 86 dollars babysittin on new years and she bought us all lunch..i got a foot long sandwhich from subway..YUM! *rub belly* lol then we went 2 wal*mart and bought some things and it was really sad b/c my mom had 2 take things out of the chart b/c we cant afford them b/c my dad moved us all up here 4 work @ a job that pays him NOTHING! and its just sad 2 c that... my mom is bein real tough and im proud of her! i wanted 2 cry though...its just sad 2 watch my family go through this and all.....ooooooh yeah my mom got stopped b/c the speed limit is gay ^ here and u have 2 drive like grandma's or something and she was goin 50 n a 40... she has 2 pay $90....which we dont have....*sigh* i dont understand this move @ all
while i was @ the mall i was thinkin b/c wen i shop or walk i think and i was thinkin bout y my birth-mom left me and i remember how i use 2 go visit her every other weekend and had fun most of the time and i remembered how she nvited me 2 go live w/ her and how i turned her down and told her i couldnt leave my mom((kris my step-mom IS MY MOM!)) and dad and after that was wen she stoped treatin me the same and turned on me and started 2 4get that i am her daughter also... so it was my fault that she left... *sigh* seems that a lot of things that happed w/ her was my fault...
and i was also thinkin bout how and y im scared of fallin n love and gettin married and havin kids wen i get older and i figured it out...its b/c after all that i have been through w/ my birth mom and my dad and their divorce and all that and all i went through w/ my dad's anger and bein hit and all and i relised the reason y im scared 4 that is b/c i dont 2 put my kids through all that i have been through and i dont want 2 hurt them b/c i have my dad's anger and its said that wat a person was put through as a kid all they do is pass it down through generations and alll that AND I DONT WAT 2 DO THAT...
does ne of that make sense..i hate wen i have time 2 think...all i do is depress myself
and also i thought bout how i feel like i have changed here and i feel like im not the person i use 2 b or that i want 2 b and i wish things would just go bak 2 wat i am use 2...
more later...theres a survery
amber
O N E
-- Name: Amber Horth
-- Birthday: September 3,1989
-- Current Location: bedroom
-- Eye Color: hazel blue
-- Hair Color: dirty blonde
-- Height: 5' 3
-- Righty Or Lefty: right.
T W O
-- Your Heritage: irish canadian
-- The Shoes You Wore Today: my fav. my pink n white dc's
-- Your Weakness: holdin my feelings nside or my dad's anger
-- Your Fears: clowns
-- Goal You Would Like To Achieve This Year: try n b happy where i am
T H R E E
-- Your Most Overused Phrase(s): yeah ur done...
-- Your Thoughts First Waking Up: here goes another useless day
-- Your Best Physical Feature: i know 2 different answers 4 that and neither i like so no answer
-- Your Bedtime: 10
-- Your Most Missed Memory: LCCG
F O U R
-- Pepsi Or Coke: coke
-- McDonald's Or Burger King: mcdonalds
-- Single Or Group Dates: both..just depending on what time and whats going on and stuff
-- Lipton Ice tea Or Nestea: nestea
-- Chocolate Or Vanilla: chocolate
-- Cappuccino Or Coffee: cappuccino
F I V E
Do You...
-- Sing: yeah
-- Take A Shower: yes..
-- Want To Go To College: yeah i cant wait i want 2 get out on my own
-- Like High School: Hell yah i did now i have 2 get use 2 a whole new 1 but i hope i like it just as much