(no subject)
In response to a meme asking what her love life was like, 
gracefullady answered "What are you talking about?" My sentiments exactly. I much enjoyed that answer. What sex life? Sorry, don't have one. Her answer is wry and funny,of course, but it made me think of some ideas that have been vaguely floating around in my head for the past couple of months. Really, I do get very tired of the modern world's obsession with sex, love, romance, and couple-ness. Who CARES???Okay, I admit, we all do, very much, but not ALL THE TIME and NOT exclusively. That is a part of life, yes, a large part of life, but in the great scheme of things what is it? I especially resent how the idea that a woman/her life isn't complete unless she has a man in her life and/or sex and a love life. When you think about it it's a very demeaning and irritating opinion and supposition. Is that all that we are? THAT'S the goal/meaning of life? We're somehow inedequate or lacking if we don't have an 'other'? GAh! It makes me furious. Sometimes even romantic comedies frustrate me, because EVERY single one of them, whether unconsiously or not, pushes the supposition that a woman's main goal in life, or rather the end result and the best thing that could happen to her, is to find a man. And that's it. Bam. Boom. In the space of two hours she progresses from being alone, needy, and often lonely to falling in love and "getting" a man, and then the story ends. Apparently there's no more to life but a happy-ever-after. It's not the same for men, or at least not quite the same. Action movies,etc. don't push the idea that if a man isn't married/doesn't have a woman he's indequate and his life is pointless. That is simplistic, I know-what I'm trying to say is that men don't get overwhelmed with the deluge of media that women do-magazines, books, romance novels, articles on "How to improve your sex life" and "How to attract men"and "How to keep your boyfriend" and "How to be single and happy"(especially despise that one, with it's implication that if you're single, you're NOT happy-why the heck WOULDN'T we be happy? How is marriage/togetherness so much MORE of a happiness generator that we need articles and special treatment to tell us how to be happy if we are single?) ads, television, and of course virtually every romantic movie out there. Ninety percent of music videos and songs are about love-which is much more excusable than films because they cover all the sides of love and don't manipulate us with the ever-repeating images and ideas of woman-getting-perfect man-whereupon her life is complete-but still. Perfume and clothing ads are virtually all about pleasing men. And of course, to read enternainment magazines, life is all about looking like a supermodel and getting-together-and breaking up. I don't mean to bash love, marriage, or even sex-at all, that's the farthest thing from my purpose. All are essential and lovely parts of life, provided by God for specific purposes. It's just that in our society and culture today they have become saturated across every aspect of life and media, blatantly used by the people who sell consumer products to manipulate and influence Western and particularly American consumers. As a result, we, as a people and as women, have come to believe that most of life has to do with sex and the opposite sex(oops-no pun intended, really^_^) Why is that, I wonder? I don't know, but I do know that, while I would be the first to admit that I am very romantic, love romance movies, and certainly plan on getting married someday, I am deathly tired of this national obsession with sex and having a love life, and particularly of this demeaning view of women and our lives.
gracefullady answered "What are you talking about?" My sentiments exactly. I much enjoyed that answer. What sex life? Sorry, don't have one. Her answer is wry and funny,of course, but it made me think of some ideas that have been vaguely floating around in my head for the past couple of months. Really, I do get very tired of the modern world's obsession with sex, love, romance, and couple-ness. Who CARES???Okay, I admit, we all do, very much, but not ALL THE TIME and NOT exclusively. That is a part of life, yes, a large part of life, but in the great scheme of things what is it? I especially resent how the idea that a woman/her life isn't complete unless she has a man in her life and/or sex and a love life. When you think about it it's a very demeaning and irritating opinion and supposition. Is that all that we are? THAT'S the goal/meaning of life? We're somehow inedequate or lacking if we don't have an 'other'? GAh! It makes me furious. Sometimes even romantic comedies frustrate me, because EVERY single one of them, whether unconsiously or not, pushes the supposition that a woman's main goal in life, or rather the end result and the best thing that could happen to her, is to find a man. And that's it. Bam. Boom. In the space of two hours she progresses from being alone, needy, and often lonely to falling in love and "getting" a man, and then the story ends. Apparently there's no more to life but a happy-ever-after. It's not the same for men, or at least not quite the same. Action movies,etc. don't push the idea that if a man isn't married/doesn't have a woman he's indequate and his life is pointless. That is simplistic, I know-what I'm trying to say is that men don't get overwhelmed with the deluge of media that women do-magazines, books, romance novels, articles on "How to improve your sex life" and "How to attract men"and "How to keep your boyfriend" and "How to be single and happy"(especially despise that one, with it's implication that if you're single, you're NOT happy-why the heck WOULDN'T we be happy? How is marriage/togetherness so much MORE of a happiness generator that we need articles and special treatment to tell us how to be happy if we are single?) ads, television, and of course virtually every romantic movie out there. Ninety percent of music videos and songs are about love-which is much more excusable than films because they cover all the sides of love and don't manipulate us with the ever-repeating images and ideas of woman-getting-perfect man-whereupon her life is complete-but still. Perfume and clothing ads are virtually all about pleasing men. And of course, to read enternainment magazines, life is all about looking like a supermodel and getting-together-and breaking up. I don't mean to bash love, marriage, or even sex-at all, that's the farthest thing from my purpose. All are essential and lovely parts of life, provided by God for specific purposes. It's just that in our society and culture today they have become saturated across every aspect of life and media, blatantly used by the people who sell consumer products to manipulate and influence Western and particularly American consumers. As a result, we, as a people and as women, have come to believe that most of life has to do with sex and the opposite sex(oops-no pun intended, really^_^) Why is that, I wonder? I don't know, but I do know that, while I would be the first to admit that I am very romantic, love romance movies, and certainly plan on getting married someday, I am deathly tired of this national obsession with sex and having a love life, and particularly of this demeaning view of women and our lives.