Weekend With Houseguest
My weekend, by the numbers.
ONE: Houseguest (19 yr old mentally retarded brother)
TWO: Days
THREE: Slices of leftover pizza devoured by houseguest. Also, trips to the grocery store
FOUR: Time in the morning when houseguest woke up to "thunder lightning" and needed comforting. Also, number of loads of laundry
FIVE: Meals prepared
SIX: Total hours of animated movies in the background
SEVEN: Maximum allowable hours of sleep per night by houseguest's schedule
EIGHT: Total hours of driving
NINE: Times per day houseguest inquired about early dismissal from school next week
And to top it all off, the bugger stole my pants.
Jon is exhausting; you get sick of repeating yourself, and having to be painstakingly explicit when you want him to do something, and having to start him out a half hour before you need him to be ready. On the upside, if you have the time and energy for a conversation, the kid is hilarious.
We talked Harry Potter on the drive to my apartment. He's ravenous for news of what happens in GoF, and kept begging for tidbits from books 5 and 6 so I couldn't help but drop them. Our rough conversation was as follows:
Me: And book six is called the Half Blood Prince.
Jon: *contemplatively* Half Blood Prince. *long pause* Who's that talking about?
Me: *excitedly* Nobody knows! It's a secret!
Jon: *after another thoughtful pause* I think Harry Potter is the prince.
Me: No, she said he's not.
Jon: *thinks some more* I think Harry Potter's father is the prince.
Me: That...that's actually possible.
This came a little after we discussed Harry's family tree, and just before Jon expressed the hope that Harry Potter would kill Malfoy's father. It amused me that he immediately leapt to the same conclusion as the fans: somebody's the HBP, maybe it's Harry. Jon is the reason I will always forgive JKR for selling out and making the movies.
There was also a little Star Wars fansquealing, and a conversation about our sister's engagement--which he sort of doesn't know about, but has always kind of assumed, so...it's complicated. But I mentioned she went to that wedding last week, and his eyes kind of lit up. "Her friend throw the bouquet? And Megan catch it! And Lucas says, Will you marry me!" He loves weddings. He's very excited at the scenario he has worked out in his mind. "SO BUSTED!"
At which point I almost had to pull the car over, I laughed so hard.
Dad sent him an email through my address, so I set Jon up and had him type a reply. It took about a million years, but he totally did it himself. (With the exception of asking me how to spell "college" and how to ask about the length of the next school week, which as I mentioned before was the source of Much Concern.)
> Hi Jon,
> Are you having fun in Pittsburgh? You will have to tell me about it next week.
> Be good for Amanda and don't eat too much. Dad
Hi Dad I go to the (tahmthelame's) college I got a cheese Hambrgr and
fries not to Much. Hi Mom How to go Back Home What day? I love
you Jonathan D.
He doesn't use the shift key: he capitalizes by pushing and then un-pressing the caps lock key. I never knew that. It was pretty funny.
We made a gingerbread house out of a kit. It was wonderfully ugly. I'm on one side of the roof, laying out Sweet Tarts in a chromatically symmetrical fashion, and he's on the other side making green icing criss-crosses like shingles. And guess whose side looks nicer? The boy is constantly showing me up. I don't think I've beat him at a card game for years.
Anyway, we went to the video store where I found Master and Commander and Big Fish for filthy cheap, and after I had returned the houseguest to school, I put in the latter and of course sobbed wildly at the ending. Then I watched part of Wizard People, Dear Reader, and contemplated making related icons before I went to bed.
ONE: Houseguest (19 yr old mentally retarded brother)
TWO: Days
THREE: Slices of leftover pizza devoured by houseguest. Also, trips to the grocery store
FOUR: Time in the morning when houseguest woke up to "thunder lightning" and needed comforting. Also, number of loads of laundry
FIVE: Meals prepared
SIX: Total hours of animated movies in the background
SEVEN: Maximum allowable hours of sleep per night by houseguest's schedule
EIGHT: Total hours of driving
NINE: Times per day houseguest inquired about early dismissal from school next week
And to top it all off, the bugger stole my pants.
Jon is exhausting; you get sick of repeating yourself, and having to be painstakingly explicit when you want him to do something, and having to start him out a half hour before you need him to be ready. On the upside, if you have the time and energy for a conversation, the kid is hilarious.
We talked Harry Potter on the drive to my apartment. He's ravenous for news of what happens in GoF, and kept begging for tidbits from books 5 and 6 so I couldn't help but drop them. Our rough conversation was as follows:
Me: And book six is called the Half Blood Prince.
Jon: *contemplatively* Half Blood Prince. *long pause* Who's that talking about?
Me: *excitedly* Nobody knows! It's a secret!
Jon: *after another thoughtful pause* I think Harry Potter is the prince.
Me: No, she said he's not.
Jon: *thinks some more* I think Harry Potter's father is the prince.
Me: That...that's actually possible.
This came a little after we discussed Harry's family tree, and just before Jon expressed the hope that Harry Potter would kill Malfoy's father. It amused me that he immediately leapt to the same conclusion as the fans: somebody's the HBP, maybe it's Harry. Jon is the reason I will always forgive JKR for selling out and making the movies.
There was also a little Star Wars fansquealing, and a conversation about our sister's engagement--which he sort of doesn't know about, but has always kind of assumed, so...it's complicated. But I mentioned she went to that wedding last week, and his eyes kind of lit up. "Her friend throw the bouquet? And Megan catch it! And Lucas says, Will you marry me!" He loves weddings. He's very excited at the scenario he has worked out in his mind. "SO BUSTED!"
At which point I almost had to pull the car over, I laughed so hard.
Dad sent him an email through my address, so I set Jon up and had him type a reply. It took about a million years, but he totally did it himself. (With the exception of asking me how to spell "college" and how to ask about the length of the next school week, which as I mentioned before was the source of Much Concern.)
> Hi Jon,
> Are you having fun in Pittsburgh? You will have to tell me about it next week.
> Be good for Amanda and don't eat too much. Dad
Hi Dad I go to the (tahmthelame's) college I got a cheese Hambrgr and
fries not to Much. Hi Mom How to go Back Home What day? I love
you Jonathan D.
He doesn't use the shift key: he capitalizes by pushing and then un-pressing the caps lock key. I never knew that. It was pretty funny.
We made a gingerbread house out of a kit. It was wonderfully ugly. I'm on one side of the roof, laying out Sweet Tarts in a chromatically symmetrical fashion, and he's on the other side making green icing criss-crosses like shingles. And guess whose side looks nicer? The boy is constantly showing me up. I don't think I've beat him at a card game for years.
Anyway, we went to the video store where I found Master and Commander and Big Fish for filthy cheap, and after I had returned the houseguest to school, I put in the latter and of course sobbed wildly at the ending. Then I watched part of Wizard People, Dear Reader, and contemplated making related icons before I went to bed.