(no subject)
You know life sux right know and i dont know what to do. i read what i wrote last night and i am in my journal a place where i type what i feel not alot of people look in here anyways. you know today at work someone told me a whole bunch of shit and i feel sorry fro some one when they are begging for attention and us the excuse as in trying to kill them selfs, and going around work telling everybody that is just plane stupidaty. i have no room to talk ive tryed to do what i did but i didnt flant is im actually ashamed of my self i was imbarist. sometimes i needed to know if i feel feel the pain that ive been going through i wanted to feel something but i also kept it to myself. trying to kill your self or destroying your body is not fun or exciting it may be for u but not for the ones that love you... most people find out that kinda shit and loose respect for them. well it depends on the situation... IF YOUR FLONTING IT... but you know i AM very suicidal right know i also have a reason but i also have a reason not to kill my self there is one person out there that loves me and thats my baby ambellina or baby claudio and no one eles.. see thats the thing ive been thinking about full custaty so i can go move back to texas in febuary 2006 i cant stand being here seeing them together and me not to be able to ATLEAST hang out with him and i keep haveing dreams about kurtus takeing full custaty and jeanette adopting my kid im scared i dont want no one to take my baby away.. u know what would happen if i sign out of here then it was over for me and this was my last entry. how many people would care would he atleast call me when ever he reads this?????????? what do i do what do i do....... HAHA BIATCH'S IM NOT A DUMB BITCH TO EVEN THINK IMMA GO TAKE MY LIFE AND MY KIDS...........
MY CHEMICAL ROMANCE LYRICS
"Cemetery Drive"
this night, walk the dead
in a solitary style
and crash the cemetery gates.
in the dress your husband hates
way down, mark the grave
where the search lights find us
drinking by the mausoleum door
and they found you on the bathroom floor
i miss you, i miss you so far
and the collision of your kiss that made it so hard
back home, off the run
singing songs that make you slit your wrists
it isn't that much fun, staring down a loaded gun
so i won't stop dying, won't stop lying
if you want i'll keep on crying
did you get what you deserve?
is this what you always want me for?
i miss you, i miss you so far
and the collision of your kiss that made it so hard
way down, way down
way down, way down
way down, way down
way down, way down
i miss you, i miss you so far
and the collision of your kiss that made it so hard
i miss you, i miss you so far
and the collision of your kiss that made it so hard
made it so hard
way down, way down
way down, way down
way down, way down
way down, way down
way down
this next song is D2 kurtus eveytime i hear this song i think of you..
MY CHEMICAL ROMANCE LYRICS
"The Ghost Of You"
i never said i'd lie in wait forever
if i died we'd be together
i can't always just forget her(him)
but she(he) could try
at the end of the world
or the last thing i see
you are
never coming home
never coming home
could i? should i?
and all the things that you never ever told me
and all the smiles that are ever ever...
ever...
get the feeling that you're never
all alone and i remember now
at the top of my lungs in my arms she (he)dies
she dies
at the end of the world
or the last thing i see
you are
never coming home
never coming home
could i? should i?
and all the things that you never ever told me
and all the smiles that are ever gonna haunt me
never coming home
never coming home
could i? should i?
and all the wounds that are ever gonna scar me
for all the ghosts that are never gonna catch me
if i fall
if i fall (down)
at the end of the world
or the last thing i see
you are
never coming home
never coming home
never coming home
never coming home
and all the things that you never ever told me
and all the smiles that are ever gonna haunt me
never coming home
never coming home
could i? should i?
and all the wounds that are ever gonna scar me
for all the ghosts that are never gonna...
imma go to sleep(forever) think abot it...