An Open Letter to 'Lost'
An Open Letter to 'Lost'
Dear Lost,
You know, I didn't like you for a year. I couldn't even stand you! I protested your existance for the mere fact that you were taking away 'Alias' boyfriend (J.J.) away for yourself and 'Alias' was never the same again (She commited suicide last year). But everyone loved you, my friend Terrence thought you were the best thing since sliced bread, my mom used to make me record you for her despite my protests...You could do no wrong. So I decided to give you a chance, I even bought your first year escapades on DVD, and you know what happened? LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT! I actually fell in love with you, and Hurley, Locke, Kate...I kinda wished Jack would die after a few episodes...but you were fantastic! I even spent an entire weekend watching your first year...I haven't done that since my last boyfriend 'X-Files' and my lesbian side lover 'Xena'!
I caught up just in time for season 2, AND I FELL DEEPER IN LOVE! Oh the drama, the mysterious hatch, the Others, the crazy british dude that called everyone 'brotha', and bestest of all ANA LUCIA!!!! Yes! She was great and I defended her to all the naysayers! I thought you couldn't get any better....AND THEN YOU SHOT HER!!!! No! Not Shannon, that spoiled bitch had it coming. I mean Ana Lucia, you shot her RIGHT IN THE FUCKING CHEST!!!!! And then you shot Libby! WHAT THE FUCK!!!! No chance of coming back. And how did you honor the toughest most bad ass chick on the island that saved the talies from the Others and brought that old fart back to his wacked out wife? You giver her a lame ass funeral where that ass-hole Jack says "Duh, well Ana was a woman of few words so I'm not gonna say much. Stay strong chica!" WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT SHIT! Then that ass-hat Bernard is not even there with his wife Rose to thank her for reuniting them...fucking unbelievable!
BUT, it wasn't all that bad...I was just bitter about that and I know that you sent a message to the rest of the cast to not get arrested for drunk driving in Hawaii while shooting the show because you will kill them off. That's cool man...I'm sure everyone was paying attention and got the memo. As I was saying you introduced the creepy Henry Gale, and you showed the others camp....that was all still great. Then you had that awesome season finale! And I couldn't wait for season 3!
I was so excited to see you again, it sucked I had to wait till October but exciting none the less. SO your first episode comes on and....It's about Jack (ugh!), Kate (she's no Ana), and the Island's punching bag Sawyer....yeah. Don't get me wrong, that opening flashback was fucking awesome! But the rest....it's was good. Another station, the polar bears belongs to the others, oh and look Jack is crying like a bitch again! (God I wish you'd just kill him already!) But I have a positive outlook for the future. The the second week comes around and we move a little further down the island and find Sun (Moon & Stars), Jin still rockin the word 'Udders', and that wacky Iraqi Sayid. You confirmed what you previously hinted at that Sun is a trollop whore, who's baby may not even belong to her Husband. Again a good episode but I have to admit at this time I started noticing this other guy over on NBC, his name is 'Heros' and we've been kinda seeing each other more and more. I've also been seeing 'Ugly Betty', 'Battlestar Galactica', and 'Dexter' .
Then all of a sudden things begin to change, as every week passes I get more annoyed with you 'Lost' the more I've fallen in love with 'Heroes' (and all those others). A part of me feels like I'm betraying you but then you do real stupid shit like making the two new characters be a part of the crashies that he been on the beach the whole time, and then you go and kill off the one guy that was still interesting, Mr. Eko (Who just so happen to have been arrested over the summer for drunk driving, I guess he missed the previous memo), and now the smoke monster can possibly morph into people and/or limbs...WTF! Why don't you kill the hobbit, or that idiot with the baby that's in love with the hobbit (again!)?
I don't know what your plans are 'Lost' but you really need to pick it up before you lose a spot on my DVR 'shecduled recordings' list. It's bad enough that you are going on a 13 week holiday after next week...so you have a lot of work to do to keep me interested in you.
Don't break my heart.
-Tanya
Dear Lost,
You know, I didn't like you for a year. I couldn't even stand you! I protested your existance for the mere fact that you were taking away 'Alias' boyfriend (J.J.) away for yourself and 'Alias' was never the same again (She commited suicide last year). But everyone loved you, my friend Terrence thought you were the best thing since sliced bread, my mom used to make me record you for her despite my protests...You could do no wrong. So I decided to give you a chance, I even bought your first year escapades on DVD, and you know what happened? LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT! I actually fell in love with you, and Hurley, Locke, Kate...I kinda wished Jack would die after a few episodes...but you were fantastic! I even spent an entire weekend watching your first year...I haven't done that since my last boyfriend 'X-Files' and my lesbian side lover 'Xena'!
I caught up just in time for season 2, AND I FELL DEEPER IN LOVE! Oh the drama, the mysterious hatch, the Others, the crazy british dude that called everyone 'brotha', and bestest of all ANA LUCIA!!!! Yes! She was great and I defended her to all the naysayers! I thought you couldn't get any better....AND THEN YOU SHOT HER!!!! No! Not Shannon, that spoiled bitch had it coming. I mean Ana Lucia, you shot her RIGHT IN THE FUCKING CHEST!!!!! And then you shot Libby! WHAT THE FUCK!!!! No chance of coming back. And how did you honor the toughest most bad ass chick on the island that saved the talies from the Others and brought that old fart back to his wacked out wife? You giver her a lame ass funeral where that ass-hole Jack says "Duh, well Ana was a woman of few words so I'm not gonna say much. Stay strong chica!" WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT SHIT! Then that ass-hat Bernard is not even there with his wife Rose to thank her for reuniting them...fucking unbelievable!
BUT, it wasn't all that bad...I was just bitter about that and I know that you sent a message to the rest of the cast to not get arrested for drunk driving in Hawaii while shooting the show because you will kill them off. That's cool man...I'm sure everyone was paying attention and got the memo. As I was saying you introduced the creepy Henry Gale, and you showed the others camp....that was all still great. Then you had that awesome season finale! And I couldn't wait for season 3!
I was so excited to see you again, it sucked I had to wait till October but exciting none the less. SO your first episode comes on and....It's about Jack (ugh!), Kate (she's no Ana), and the Island's punching bag Sawyer....yeah. Don't get me wrong, that opening flashback was fucking awesome! But the rest....it's was good. Another station, the polar bears belongs to the others, oh and look Jack is crying like a bitch again! (God I wish you'd just kill him already!) But I have a positive outlook for the future. The the second week comes around and we move a little further down the island and find Sun (Moon & Stars), Jin still rockin the word 'Udders', and that wacky Iraqi Sayid. You confirmed what you previously hinted at that Sun is a trollop whore, who's baby may not even belong to her Husband. Again a good episode but I have to admit at this time I started noticing this other guy over on NBC, his name is 'Heros' and we've been kinda seeing each other more and more. I've also been seeing 'Ugly Betty', 'Battlestar Galactica', and 'Dexter' .
Then all of a sudden things begin to change, as every week passes I get more annoyed with you 'Lost' the more I've fallen in love with 'Heroes' (and all those others). A part of me feels like I'm betraying you but then you do real stupid shit like making the two new characters be a part of the crashies that he been on the beach the whole time, and then you go and kill off the one guy that was still interesting, Mr. Eko (Who just so happen to have been arrested over the summer for drunk driving, I guess he missed the previous memo), and now the smoke monster can possibly morph into people and/or limbs...WTF! Why don't you kill the hobbit, or that idiot with the baby that's in love with the hobbit (again!)?
I don't know what your plans are 'Lost' but you really need to pick it up before you lose a spot on my DVR 'shecduled recordings' list. It's bad enough that you are going on a 13 week holiday after next week...so you have a lot of work to do to keep me interested in you.
Don't break my heart.
-Tanya