(no subject)
So this past weekend was prolly going to be my last weekend to go out and do something. So I tried making the best of it. Kinda learned how you cant trust some people tho. Idk...fucked up.
Been busy working and shit. The money is great. Got my first check today. Amanda has bills to pay now. EW.
Idk about school anymore. I want to go. But if my financial aid doesnt cover it I cant afford to pay for it so Im gonna have to put school off for a lil bit.
I would love to just pack up and move back to the hood right now. Im really thinking about it to if the whole financial aid thing doesnt go through. I kno I just started my job and all but I could always talk to them about transferring and if not Ill have to look for a job in the hood. So if anyone knows of any place hiring down there lemme know!
But idk...I need to change the way I am. It was fun at first but now its out of control and I dont like it anymore. Anyone ever felt like that? Just everything in general? It only took 2 REALLY bad things to happen to me to realize it too. Shouldnt have taken that long. But theres nothing I can do about it now. Wish there was. Its like my life has two sides. Like the whole furthering myself like job wise and everything is going great. Couldnt ask for anything better. But the whole social aspect is dwindling downwards and no one knows it but me. I need to find some sort of stability for that aspect. I mean I love my friends. And Ive done a few things that If they knew they would never talk to me again. Idk what possessed me to do it or what not but Im not proud of it. Any of it. But all of it is nothing I could have done on my own. These are the type of things that it takes more than one person.
Idk...What am I suppose to do?!
Been busy working and shit. The money is great. Got my first check today. Amanda has bills to pay now. EW.
Idk about school anymore. I want to go. But if my financial aid doesnt cover it I cant afford to pay for it so Im gonna have to put school off for a lil bit.
I would love to just pack up and move back to the hood right now. Im really thinking about it to if the whole financial aid thing doesnt go through. I kno I just started my job and all but I could always talk to them about transferring and if not Ill have to look for a job in the hood. So if anyone knows of any place hiring down there lemme know!
But idk...I need to change the way I am. It was fun at first but now its out of control and I dont like it anymore. Anyone ever felt like that? Just everything in general? It only took 2 REALLY bad things to happen to me to realize it too. Shouldnt have taken that long. But theres nothing I can do about it now. Wish there was. Its like my life has two sides. Like the whole furthering myself like job wise and everything is going great. Couldnt ask for anything better. But the whole social aspect is dwindling downwards and no one knows it but me. I need to find some sort of stability for that aspect. I mean I love my friends. And Ive done a few things that If they knew they would never talk to me again. Idk what possessed me to do it or what not but Im not proud of it. Any of it. But all of it is nothing I could have done on my own. These are the type of things that it takes more than one person.
Idk...What am I suppose to do?!