victory is an elusive whore
The thing is, given any current time you are bound to feel certain ways, and even though you feel that way now, you won't feel that way forever. So when I say all of these things, I already know that I might feel differently later. I'm always surprised at the number of people who feel the need to tell you that you won't feel a certain way forever
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i generally assume that nobody is watching, that nobody reads what i write or gives my thoughts/opinions much merit, that i DO NOT affect ppl in any way
i don't know if ppl like me, i never know if ppl just seem to tolerate me, if they are just "being nice" but secretly wish i would go away
so mostly i just don't think about it - it's a lesson i learned, and had to learn over and over, in elementary and middle school, and by the time i hit 8th grade i really didn't give a fuck anymore
i'm bitchy and opinionated, but that's really mostly online - if you'd known me in "real life" first, you'd wonder if my journal was actually written by me
for the most part i tend to shy away from conflict of any kind, not only b/c i am a timid little mouse, but mostly b/c i just can't be arsed to argue with ppl anymore - i'm pretty mellow, but only when I Don't Care (when I Do Care, i'm fairly certain i could drive ppl to want to stab blunt pencils into my eyeballs)
so i'm only "temperate" when i have no investment in... whatever is going on
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Me too! That's why I sometimes delete my LJ entries shortly after I post them. Or wonder later if I should have. btw, you don't seem bitchy and opinionated to me. Well, occasionally opinionated, but not bitchy. I haven't the faintest idea how I seem online. I'm certainly a lot more verbose than in RL, where I tend to hold back and be reserved.
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~ahem~ i mean... what?
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