for we are the slaves of the dark lord's war.
1. cruentum is taking his first oral exam (of many) for his Masters today. [insert joke about an exam room with 7.44 and GDL]. I wish him the best of luck, because he's super smart, but super freaked (completely understandable), and I would make a joke about only being a master of evil, Darth, but he doesn't know Star Wars, for which I feel like a bad big sister. Like I have failed somehow. WHERE DID I GO WRONG?
This is anticlimactic, as he has already been and returned triumphant and shit, but I wrote this part last night, so I'm keeping it anyway.
2. help_haiti has another lightning starting today. I don't think I have the will to go on it, but I encourage you to if you are up for it. If I could manage to do things BRIEFLY, I would. Jesus. Or if you make me an offer I can't resist. askance, I have not forgotten you. You have the big gun, and these are tiny, like the stun gun. And to complete the whole allusion, husiemama, you have the scanner that makes Ianto throw cookies.
3. Howard Zinn is dead. Uhm. Yeah. But yes! UNUSED AUDIO COMMENTARY BY HOWARD ZINN AND NOAM CHOMSKY, RECORDED FOR THE RETURN OF THE KING (PLATINUM SERIES EXTENDED EDITION) DVD. My favorite bit is:
ZINN: Now we flash forward to Sam and Frodo, deeply embarked upon their journey toward Mount Doom. What do they do? They sleep an extraordinary amount, and when they're not sleeping they stagger about with the glazed and dissipated stare of recovering addicts. Clearly they're struggling with pipe-weed and mead withdrawal. Where exactly are they now?
CHOMSKY: Mordor, the "dark land." Which you correctly pointed out before we began should be properly known as Orcistan.
ZINN: Naturally, seeing that it's Men who trapped the Orcs within its borders and started referring to these lands as "Mordor." Orcs, of course, used to live throughout Middle Earth, before they were corralled-in a heartbreaking Orcish "Trail of Tears"-into this inhospitable, seismically active land.
CHOMSKY: Note later the beautiful, fertile fields between Minas Tirith and the mountains that encircle Mordor. Neither Men nor Orcs cultivate them, and clearly the purpose of the garrison at Osgiliath is to keep Orcs away from valuable farmland.
ZINN: Remember: What do Orcs eat? "Maggoty old bread," as one in the previous film put it. Now we see Gandalf and company arriving at Orthanc after the battle of Helm's Deep, where they discover an Ent-caused ecological disaster.
CHOMSKY: And we have two Hobbits sitting on a wall enjoying some Longbottom leaf. I wish someone could explain to me the supposed charm of these inebriated little meddlers.
Oh you little scamps.
4. WANT.
5. Australia Bans the A cup in porn because they resemble (pre) pubescent girls or something. Look, I'm just saying, THIS IS HOW THEY GET YA. Also, they're not too fond of golden showers. (h/t kin_you_bi)
6. I wish I had a gong to ring every time something stupid was done in the world. I need a gong. Gongs make me think of (NewYorkMinimalistComposer) Phillip Glass. Why is that?
THE SHARK FROM THE THIRD ACT IS IN THERE, KENNY.
This is anticlimactic, as he has already been and returned triumphant and shit, but I wrote this part last night, so I'm keeping it anyway.
2. help_haiti has another lightning starting today. I don't think I have the will to go on it, but I encourage you to if you are up for it. If I could manage to do things BRIEFLY, I would. Jesus. Or if you make me an offer I can't resist. askance, I have not forgotten you. You have the big gun, and these are tiny, like the stun gun. And to complete the whole allusion, husiemama, you have the scanner that makes Ianto throw cookies.
3. Howard Zinn is dead. Uhm. Yeah. But yes! UNUSED AUDIO COMMENTARY BY HOWARD ZINN AND NOAM CHOMSKY, RECORDED FOR THE RETURN OF THE KING (PLATINUM SERIES EXTENDED EDITION) DVD. My favorite bit is:
ZINN: Now we flash forward to Sam and Frodo, deeply embarked upon their journey toward Mount Doom. What do they do? They sleep an extraordinary amount, and when they're not sleeping they stagger about with the glazed and dissipated stare of recovering addicts. Clearly they're struggling with pipe-weed and mead withdrawal. Where exactly are they now?
CHOMSKY: Mordor, the "dark land." Which you correctly pointed out before we began should be properly known as Orcistan.
ZINN: Naturally, seeing that it's Men who trapped the Orcs within its borders and started referring to these lands as "Mordor." Orcs, of course, used to live throughout Middle Earth, before they were corralled-in a heartbreaking Orcish "Trail of Tears"-into this inhospitable, seismically active land.
CHOMSKY: Note later the beautiful, fertile fields between Minas Tirith and the mountains that encircle Mordor. Neither Men nor Orcs cultivate them, and clearly the purpose of the garrison at Osgiliath is to keep Orcs away from valuable farmland.
ZINN: Remember: What do Orcs eat? "Maggoty old bread," as one in the previous film put it. Now we see Gandalf and company arriving at Orthanc after the battle of Helm's Deep, where they discover an Ent-caused ecological disaster.
CHOMSKY: And we have two Hobbits sitting on a wall enjoying some Longbottom leaf. I wish someone could explain to me the supposed charm of these inebriated little meddlers.
Oh you little scamps.
4. WANT.
5. Australia Bans the A cup in porn because they resemble (pre) pubescent girls or something. Look, I'm just saying, THIS IS HOW THEY GET YA. Also, they're not too fond of golden showers. (h/t kin_you_bi)
6. I wish I had a gong to ring every time something stupid was done in the world. I need a gong. Gongs make me think of (NewYorkMinimalistComposer) Phillip Glass. Why is that?
THE SHARK FROM THE THIRD ACT IS IN THERE, KENNY.