My interesting. Let me show you it.
Okay so all the people on my flist are whining about how slow LJ is, so I shall combat that with a big ol' shot of ME. Also, holy shit peoples, did ICHC just do a MASSIVE info dump this morning? It was like an LOLcat puked all over my monitor.
I think we should take the moment to discuss a POLL. Because SOMEONE MADE FUN OF ME FOR SAYING IT THE WAY I DO.
Poll How do you say it?
I feel accomplished and the day I still young! Like me!
Nothing.
1. Okay, that's a lie. I made tuna salad. IT WAS THE BEST TUNA SALAD EVER AND YOU SHOULD ALL FEEL BAD YOU COULDN'T TASTE IT. I thought about smearing some on the screen for you, but then the portion of my brain that actually FUNCTIONS IN THE REAL WORLD was like, "yes, the computer is still under warranty, but they haven't invented taste-o-vision yet." Oh FUTURAMA, get here.
2. I also went to Borders, a.k.a. THE THING THAT IS THE BANE OF MY EXISTENCE. As I and the kidlet walked towards its gaping maw doors, I heard its nefarious laughter.
What did I buy? I'll tell you! SHAMELESSLY.
A. The 4th TPB of Buffy season 8, which I bought needlessly because I read the whole thing whilst kidlet "rearranged" the shelves in the children's section.
B. Prisoner of the State: The Secret Journal of Premier Zhao Ziying (you can all marvel at the fact that I can read something that doesn't have pictures, now. Actually. There's a photo section in the middle, but they're all of old men in Mao suits, so that doesn't count.)
C. A gift for someone who reads this LJ. Ha ha, bite me, [Bad username!].
D. Skin Trade by Laurell K. Hamilton. (not in the face! Not in the face!)
OKAY OKAY, so there's a little shame here, but I am INVESTED.
3. Random thought: At the end of The Tudors, season 1 there's a scene in which Anne and Henry ride into the forest and have the BEST ORGASM DENIAL SCENE EVER. It's good.
4. PITTSBURGH PEOPLES: PITTGIRL IS BACK. YES. (h/t emquilxy VIA SNAIL MAIL, how about that?)
5. Oh, I want to talk more about what a shitty mom I am. Okay, so I'm a single mum, but I pay my mum to watch the kidlet three days a week (M/W/F), from 12:30 to dinnertime. I use that time to pick my nose, stare off into space, have animated conversations with the juicer without the kidlet coming in and saying, "WHAT ARE YOU DOING?" Alas, mum has been in the UK since…the 20th. Two weeks today.
I am the worst mom ever. I cannot tell you how happy I am to put her to bed, to put her down for a nap, to put on SCHOOLHOUSE ROCK and say, "Hey, it's the Tax Man!" As it is, I have been animatedly talking to things her in presence, and all I can think is that VK will grow up thinking that a) Mommy is mentally ill (which is greatly up for debate) or b) all adults have imaginary friends. I won't lie. I have an imaginary friend. No, I can't see her, but we dish. About shit. She hates Ianto's ties. But loves JB's teeth. She has no taste.
So, uh. I had a point. No, wait, I didn't. OH! Yeah. I'm vid chatting with mum today (and how awesome is that? Taste the future! AND YET NO TASTE-O-VISION.) and she says, "Oh, when I get back, I want her Thursday and Friday!" Let me tell you, I almost wept (AND SHE HAS NO BACKSIES ON THAT-DO YOU READ ME, joanwilder?) because originally, we had planned that she would return home Wednesday, then not take the kid Friday so that she could recover, and that meant that she wouldn't take her until Monday). All I have to do is make it another week, and then I'll have scheduled me-time where I can walk out of the house by myself and not be committing an act worthy of calling Child and Youth services.
(LOL BTW I know I'm not a shitty mum. In fact, I'm pretty fracking sweet. But right now, mommy needs ME-TIME.)
6. Also, so I wrote a piece of anon porn over on sizeofthatthing but now I kind of want to post it here, for archivial's sake. Is that a no no? I like it too much not to claim it. OTOH, how can I say that I'm not ripping off anyone else? Damn you, anon memes!
7. OH OH OH, I have a kink_bingo card! Let's all anticipate fisting! Or gunplay. HARRY S. TRUMAN/JOSIE PACKARD TWIN PEAKS GUNPLAY. They said to be out of the comfort zone. I think gunplay is about as uncomfortable as it gets. What can make gunplay terrifying? Experiencing this, peoples.
8. KIDS IN THE HALL MOMENT: I wish there were more people who remembered them, because sometimes I want to turn to someone and randomly say, 'I had the dream about the pears again.'
I think we should take the moment to discuss a POLL. Because SOMEONE MADE FUN OF ME FOR SAYING IT THE WAY I DO.
Poll How do you say it?
I feel accomplished and the day I still young! Like me!
Nothing.
1. Okay, that's a lie. I made tuna salad. IT WAS THE BEST TUNA SALAD EVER AND YOU SHOULD ALL FEEL BAD YOU COULDN'T TASTE IT. I thought about smearing some on the screen for you, but then the portion of my brain that actually FUNCTIONS IN THE REAL WORLD was like, "yes, the computer is still under warranty, but they haven't invented taste-o-vision yet." Oh FUTURAMA, get here.
2. I also went to Borders, a.k.a. THE THING THAT IS THE BANE OF MY EXISTENCE. As I and the kidlet walked towards its gaping maw doors, I heard its nefarious laughter.
What did I buy? I'll tell you! SHAMELESSLY.
A. The 4th TPB of Buffy season 8, which I bought needlessly because I read the whole thing whilst kidlet "rearranged" the shelves in the children's section.
B. Prisoner of the State: The Secret Journal of Premier Zhao Ziying (you can all marvel at the fact that I can read something that doesn't have pictures, now. Actually. There's a photo section in the middle, but they're all of old men in Mao suits, so that doesn't count.)
C. A gift for someone who reads this LJ. Ha ha, bite me, [Bad username!].
D. Skin Trade by Laurell K. Hamilton. (not in the face! Not in the face!)
OKAY OKAY, so there's a little shame here, but I am INVESTED.
3. Random thought: At the end of The Tudors, season 1 there's a scene in which Anne and Henry ride into the forest and have the BEST ORGASM DENIAL SCENE EVER. It's good.
4. PITTSBURGH PEOPLES: PITTGIRL IS BACK. YES. (h/t emquilxy VIA SNAIL MAIL, how about that?)
5. Oh, I want to talk more about what a shitty mom I am. Okay, so I'm a single mum, but I pay my mum to watch the kidlet three days a week (M/W/F), from 12:30 to dinnertime. I use that time to pick my nose, stare off into space, have animated conversations with the juicer without the kidlet coming in and saying, "WHAT ARE YOU DOING?" Alas, mum has been in the UK since…the 20th. Two weeks today.
I am the worst mom ever. I cannot tell you how happy I am to put her to bed, to put her down for a nap, to put on SCHOOLHOUSE ROCK and say, "Hey, it's the Tax Man!" As it is, I have been animatedly talking to things her in presence, and all I can think is that VK will grow up thinking that a) Mommy is mentally ill (which is greatly up for debate) or b) all adults have imaginary friends. I won't lie. I have an imaginary friend. No, I can't see her, but we dish. About shit. She hates Ianto's ties. But loves JB's teeth. She has no taste.
So, uh. I had a point. No, wait, I didn't. OH! Yeah. I'm vid chatting with mum today (and how awesome is that? Taste the future! AND YET NO TASTE-O-VISION.) and she says, "Oh, when I get back, I want her Thursday and Friday!" Let me tell you, I almost wept (AND SHE HAS NO BACKSIES ON THAT-DO YOU READ ME, joanwilder?) because originally, we had planned that she would return home Wednesday, then not take the kid Friday so that she could recover, and that meant that she wouldn't take her until Monday). All I have to do is make it another week, and then I'll have scheduled me-time where I can walk out of the house by myself and not be committing an act worthy of calling Child and Youth services.
(LOL BTW I know I'm not a shitty mum. In fact, I'm pretty fracking sweet. But right now, mommy needs ME-TIME.)
6. Also, so I wrote a piece of anon porn over on sizeofthatthing but now I kind of want to post it here, for archivial's sake. Is that a no no? I like it too much not to claim it. OTOH, how can I say that I'm not ripping off anyone else? Damn you, anon memes!
7. OH OH OH, I have a kink_bingo card! Let's all anticipate fisting! Or gunplay. HARRY S. TRUMAN/JOSIE PACKARD TWIN PEAKS GUNPLAY. They said to be out of the comfort zone. I think gunplay is about as uncomfortable as it gets. What can make gunplay terrifying? Experiencing this, peoples.
8. KIDS IN THE HALL MOMENT: I wish there were more people who remembered them, because sometimes I want to turn to someone and randomly say, 'I had the dream about the pears again.'