oh and this cough won't go away
SIGH
today was the least stress-free "free" day i've ever had....i was supposed to have a day off of studying and exams....but it was insanely stressful....
so my mom calls and it's fun and everything and i book my flights to france AUG 1- AUG 23
and she makes me question moving from this apartment to another one in the same building that has even smaller rooms.....and im freaking out because i am clostrophobic and think maybe i should go apartment searching for the next week im here (with a sept lease which is impossible)....
then im about to go out with kate for a walk to chill out, and i get the call from Frank "sorry amalia but i just found out about this plan to lend the car to your friend to drive to montreal, but the car wouldnt make it and i dont know your friend....", and i feel mad at everyone (and myself) for this stupid car thing cuz i have -7$ in my bank account and i don't know what jess is gonna do..cuz now were supposed to take the bus with all our fucking shit and no money...so i want to cry.
then i come home after chilling out with kate, and gaby tells me that i should come home by thursday cuz it's the only time i can visit her at Bard and i could see Talib Kweli for free at Vassar and then go party with gaby and anya....which is great but how am i gonna be back in NY by thursday.....
then my mom calls again and starts freaking out about the red cello saying i need to ship it to france cuz granma wants the cello, and i waste 3 hours searching online and all i can find is business shipping which does not entail fragile shipments of any kind.....why does she tell me shit like this now?
and she brings up the phone and internet and how i maybe should leave it all summer because i might come back and i would skip the whole installation fees this way....i was just gonna cancel, but now i have one more thing to freak out over....oh and ...."how are you spending your money...why is it all gone, i dont udnerstand......"
and i dont know if i got into Concordia for photography nor do i know what i want to do right now....all i know is whatever i decide i have to stick by until the end of my Bachelors degree and im scared.
and i get the brilliant idea of maybe staying in the apartment and making our rooms more like living rooms so getting futons and im looking online at hte postings and im gonna need to go look at the beds in stores and shit.....
and im taking the bus down on thursday? wednesday? my last exam is tuesday....i havent packed, i need a new suitcase, i dont have money to pay for this....what am i doing with the red cello that my granma demands to have, and am i sticking with music as my major...how am i gonna get through this without lessons, im so dependant on Elizabeth to help me, and can i stand to study music theory for another 2 years......am i taking the cat to france iwth me and getting her vet passport eventhough shes under JEsse's family name and i dont know if Air India will take her.....what lease am i signing...is our apartment alreday taken???
fuck me.
today was the least stress-free "free" day i've ever had....i was supposed to have a day off of studying and exams....but it was insanely stressful....
so my mom calls and it's fun and everything and i book my flights to france AUG 1- AUG 23
and she makes me question moving from this apartment to another one in the same building that has even smaller rooms.....and im freaking out because i am clostrophobic and think maybe i should go apartment searching for the next week im here (with a sept lease which is impossible)....
then im about to go out with kate for a walk to chill out, and i get the call from Frank "sorry amalia but i just found out about this plan to lend the car to your friend to drive to montreal, but the car wouldnt make it and i dont know your friend....", and i feel mad at everyone (and myself) for this stupid car thing cuz i have -7$ in my bank account and i don't know what jess is gonna do..cuz now were supposed to take the bus with all our fucking shit and no money...so i want to cry.
then i come home after chilling out with kate, and gaby tells me that i should come home by thursday cuz it's the only time i can visit her at Bard and i could see Talib Kweli for free at Vassar and then go party with gaby and anya....which is great but how am i gonna be back in NY by thursday.....
then my mom calls again and starts freaking out about the red cello saying i need to ship it to france cuz granma wants the cello, and i waste 3 hours searching online and all i can find is business shipping which does not entail fragile shipments of any kind.....why does she tell me shit like this now?
and she brings up the phone and internet and how i maybe should leave it all summer because i might come back and i would skip the whole installation fees this way....i was just gonna cancel, but now i have one more thing to freak out over....oh and ...."how are you spending your money...why is it all gone, i dont udnerstand......"
and i dont know if i got into Concordia for photography nor do i know what i want to do right now....all i know is whatever i decide i have to stick by until the end of my Bachelors degree and im scared.
and i get the brilliant idea of maybe staying in the apartment and making our rooms more like living rooms so getting futons and im looking online at hte postings and im gonna need to go look at the beds in stores and shit.....
and im taking the bus down on thursday? wednesday? my last exam is tuesday....i havent packed, i need a new suitcase, i dont have money to pay for this....what am i doing with the red cello that my granma demands to have, and am i sticking with music as my major...how am i gonna get through this without lessons, im so dependant on Elizabeth to help me, and can i stand to study music theory for another 2 years......am i taking the cat to france iwth me and getting her vet passport eventhough shes under JEsse's family name and i dont know if Air India will take her.....what lease am i signing...is our apartment alreday taken???
fuck me.