feeling comfortable
Yesturday I went to this Bar-B-Que. I was invited by this guy Jason. I do not really know him at all. I met him in a resturant, Bangkok on 15th. I was dining by myself and over heard his conversation with his friend. It turned out that she had just applied for an AmeriCorp position at camp sealth. They invited me to join them, which I did, and enjoyed a nice meal with them. Jason took my phone number and offered his friendship to a girl who was knew in town.
So he invited me to this Bar-B-que out in Skyway...which is just barely in Seattle. When he had called to invite me, he had said that he had been feeling ill, and mentioned again when he called to pick me up the next day that his illness had gotten worse. I wondered why he was going at all, nevertheless, why he invited me.
We picked up two of his friends and headed over to the house, where for a good amount of time we sat deposited in front of the TV watching football. Everyone was nice and all....Jason, I assume due to his illness, wasn't that much of a friend to me. He didn't introduce me to anyone, thses people all being his close friends. I was left to staggering around introducing myslef, with the whole "by the way, I'm Lisa."
I appreciated Jason's effort and the fact that he invited me at all. I just felt so uncomfortable. and the fact that I barley know him, I had no one to latch onto for comfort. It made me realize, or it was the pinnacle of my realizing, cause i have been thinking it, that I need to become comfortable in my own skin. I lack the ability to feel comfortable in these situations because I am unconfortable with myself. Now how to remedy this?
On top of all this, I never knew Jason's intentions on inviting me. He is attractive, funny, nice...and of course he has a girlfriend, which he had failed to mention to me at all. I just thought about her and how she must be thin and attractive and have perfect straight teeth.
It was a strange day. I do intend on calling Jason tonight and thanking him for inviting me and to tell him I had a nice time, which I suppose I did.
On another note. I have found another job. I am once again a corporate whore. What kind of person am I that I belive that corporations are wrong and try not to purchase things from them when I can yet I continue to let myself be employed by them? And not for a lack of effort on my part in trying to find other jobs. I applied at one big chain, Barnes and Noble, I applied at 4 other places, nothing, not even a phone call back from the others. Jeez. Is this ethical?
So he invited me to this Bar-B-que out in Skyway...which is just barely in Seattle. When he had called to invite me, he had said that he had been feeling ill, and mentioned again when he called to pick me up the next day that his illness had gotten worse. I wondered why he was going at all, nevertheless, why he invited me.
We picked up two of his friends and headed over to the house, where for a good amount of time we sat deposited in front of the TV watching football. Everyone was nice and all....Jason, I assume due to his illness, wasn't that much of a friend to me. He didn't introduce me to anyone, thses people all being his close friends. I was left to staggering around introducing myslef, with the whole "by the way, I'm Lisa."
I appreciated Jason's effort and the fact that he invited me at all. I just felt so uncomfortable. and the fact that I barley know him, I had no one to latch onto for comfort. It made me realize, or it was the pinnacle of my realizing, cause i have been thinking it, that I need to become comfortable in my own skin. I lack the ability to feel comfortable in these situations because I am unconfortable with myself. Now how to remedy this?
On top of all this, I never knew Jason's intentions on inviting me. He is attractive, funny, nice...and of course he has a girlfriend, which he had failed to mention to me at all. I just thought about her and how she must be thin and attractive and have perfect straight teeth.
It was a strange day. I do intend on calling Jason tonight and thanking him for inviting me and to tell him I had a nice time, which I suppose I did.
On another note. I have found another job. I am once again a corporate whore. What kind of person am I that I belive that corporations are wrong and try not to purchase things from them when I can yet I continue to let myself be employed by them? And not for a lack of effort on my part in trying to find other jobs. I applied at one big chain, Barnes and Noble, I applied at 4 other places, nothing, not even a phone call back from the others. Jeez. Is this ethical?