Starting....
I am getting real good at suffering in silence. Lost another baby 8/2, 9wks old. My body is still hurting. Emotionally I feel drained. I am married but I don't really feel married. Only thing that is different is that I am taking care of someone other then my mother. Depression is kicking in. Rather just sleep because at least there I feel happy. In the last week I've maybe spent 7hrs with him. I use to fight with him about needing attention but now I too sick of it to fight. He does say that he loves me and he is good to me. I feel trapped in continuous purgatory. Living far from my family does take a toll on me. I have no friends here. I really have nothing. I live in a home where he and his ex has lived in for years. Nothing about this place feels like me. I miss him touching me... I feel alone. Take care of the house, cats, and cook... Seems like all he wants me here for.