theres only so much one person can take...
it's what people do without thinking
that causes the quick tears
eventually the tears will be forgotten
but the hurt will stay in the heart forever...
Welp, im slowly loosing everything that has ever been important to me. All i can say is thank you to the people who are keeping me going. As sad as i am because of all these sudden changes, I know that this is the beginning of a new life. I am keeping myself occupied. I have seen amazing quilities in friends ive always had. I've just been blinded from them becuase ive dedicated my life to someone who didnt really let me see them. I never thought things would end this way. It hurts me to say that people were envious of our friendship for no reason. I'm actually starting to be ok with the whole letting go thing. Dont get me wrong, there are soo many things ill miss terribly. I have to look at it like "it was fun while it lasted". I hope one day things will be better... but i also know they can never be the same. And its all becuase these painful words keep replaying in my head... over and over again. I want to wake up tomorrow morning and start over new.
Im leaving for Florida soon. We have a really early flight tuesday morning. Its ironic, a week ago i thought going there was going to make me miserable, but now im anxious to get away. I think its gonna be really good for me to clear my head for a couple of days. Theres to much here that reminds me. Not to mention, everyone wants to know the story. I cant see anymore shocked faces. Its too painful to talk about the end of a friendship that we all thought would last forever. I still dont wanna move to Florida, but i am anyway? I cant even begin to describe the mixed feelings I have on going. It just doesnt seem right. blahhh, my life these days....
Im def gonna be ok though. Its stuff like this that makes me stronger and builds my character. I'll miss everyone while im there. Luckily this time its not forever. I'll be home saturday. This makes me really cherish what I still have here... even if its not going to be for much longer..... =/