Fic: Wank! Haiku! (Primeval, various characters, various pairings, R)
Title: Wank! Haiku!
Author: alyse
Fandom: Primeval
Pairing/Characters: Abby, Connor (Abby/Connor), Rex/rock (totally canon, baby!), Jenny, Ryan/Stephen, Helen, Nick (Nick/Stephen), Lester, Leek/Lester.
Rating: R
Spoilers: Series 2
Disclaimer: Primeval and its characters belong to Impossible Pictures. No copyright infringement is intended. This is fanfiction, written solely for love of the show.
Word Count: >100.
Status: Complete.
Warnings: Occasionally weird sense of humour. Avoid low flying squirrels.
Author's Notes: Written for mmom. That was the only excuse I needed.
Summary: Wank, in haiku form.
-o-
Connor dreams of her
smile, her voice, her touch; but then
he always wakes alone.
Abby doesn't dream.
Each night she eases herself
to sleep with a touch.
Under the warm lights,
Rex chirrups and stretches his
wings. He loves his rock.
Jenny doesn't sleep.
She uses her vibrator
and wakes the neighbours.
This is Ryan's gun.
Stephen's rifle is bigger;
Tom polishes both.
Helen has found a
good use for that mammoth bone.
She calls it 'Stephen'.
Nick drinks to forget,
in dreaming remembers, and
longs for Stephen's touch.
Sir James Lester does
not ever masturbate; that's
why he has minions.
Just once, Leek thinks, it
would be nice to have James wipe
Leek's come from his face.
The End.
What?
Author: alyse
Fandom: Primeval
Pairing/Characters: Abby, Connor (Abby/Connor), Rex/rock (totally canon, baby!), Jenny, Ryan/Stephen, Helen, Nick (Nick/Stephen), Lester, Leek/Lester.
Rating: R
Spoilers: Series 2
Disclaimer: Primeval and its characters belong to Impossible Pictures. No copyright infringement is intended. This is fanfiction, written solely for love of the show.
Word Count: >100.
Status: Complete.
Warnings: Occasionally weird sense of humour. Avoid low flying squirrels.
Author's Notes: Written for mmom. That was the only excuse I needed.
Summary: Wank, in haiku form.
-o-
Connor dreams of her
smile, her voice, her touch; but then
he always wakes alone.
Abby doesn't dream.
Each night she eases herself
to sleep with a touch.
Under the warm lights,
Rex chirrups and stretches his
wings. He loves his rock.
Jenny doesn't sleep.
She uses her vibrator
and wakes the neighbours.
This is Ryan's gun.
Stephen's rifle is bigger;
Tom polishes both.
Helen has found a
good use for that mammoth bone.
She calls it 'Stephen'.
Nick drinks to forget,
in dreaming remembers, and
longs for Stephen's touch.
Sir James Lester does
not ever masturbate; that's
why he has minions.
Just once, Leek thinks, it
would be nice to have James wipe
Leek's come from his face.
The End.
What?