LJI Week 16: Dear Diary, Love Toby Monster
This is my entry for Week 16 of LJ Idol Friends & Rivals therealljidol. Of the many topics, I chose "When is a monster not a monster? Oh, when you love it."
Monsterday, Munch 21, 2016
My Boy, the Nighttime Pals, and I are on an Adventure. We are staying at the old man's house, whose name is Pappy. He has a mustache and likes to talk. Not with the mustache, although sometimes the mustache is the only one who seems to be listening. He mostly talks to the Boy's Mommy, who has been gone much of the day for two days straight. When she comes back, she takes a shower right away and won't let the Boy hug her first. She smells like she has rolled around on a veterinarian's lawn. She brings back clear plastic bins, mostly filled with papers, and sits on the couch, sorting them. Some are tossed into a large plastic bag (for shedding), some go into the trash can (for throwing up), and some are placed gently on the table (for keeps). All night long, Pappy talks to her, and her eyes look far away, her mouth set in a thin line. Maybe she is thinking about monsters.
The Nighttime Pals and I are sleeping on a very high, small bed. Last night, the Boy kicked us out on the floor while having a bad dream. I landed first, so Bunny and Bear both landed on me and can stop complaining about how high it was and how hard they landed. It is a good thing monsters bounce.
From my place on the floor, I got a better view under the bed. No bad monsters. Just the way I like it. Scaring bad monsters away is much easier when there are no bad monsters to scare.
Tootsday, Munch 22, 2016
The Boy was very cross last night, because he spent all day with his Mommy, sitting in offices and playing games on his LeapPad. He complained it was "not very fun." He didn't take me with him, so I don't know exactly what his Mommy was doing in the offices, but I heard her talking on the phone. She said something about signing a compact with an octoneer, whatever that is. Or maybe it was an octopus? Or an engineer? Whoever it was will be selling the old lady's house, the Mommy says. The old lady's name was Grandma, and she used to walk very slow and talk in a sweet, gentle voice to the Boy. They used to paint things together.
After Grandma died, the Boy and his older cousin drew everything they could see, even pictures of me. I was very flattened. Because paper makes you two-diamond-sional. I was also flattered.
The Boy's drawing on top, the cousin's drawing below
Thornsday, Munch 24, 2016
Today was a very good day. My Boy made me my own car! A car is a thing with wheels that someone pushes around, and you sit in it and go "Wheee!" inside your head. The best part: zipping down the hard-wood floor in the hallway. The worst part: bumping down the steps. When we go down the steps, I usually go, "Aaaaaaaa!!!" inside my head.
The Mommy's sister has arrived. Her name is Ant Elli, which I think means she is part ant and part elephant. She brought her husband, Uncle Jeff, and her little girls, who have names I never hear very well. They talk differently from the Boy, and their voices are very high and get caught in my horns. I call the older one Fee-Fee and the younger one May-May, which is close enough. They are fun, because they like to play with me and the Nighttime Pals. Fee-Fee brought us one by one into the big red room for living in (not for sleeping, which has its own special and important room). Bear, Bunny and Cow got to mingle with Fee-Fee's toys, and she got out a stealth-a-scope and listened to all of our inside voices. (I said "Weee!" just for her, and she smiled.) May-May gave me lots of hugs and drooled on me. I don't mind, because baby drool is a great way to scare away bad monsters, if they ever show up.
The boy pushes me in my car.
Saturnday, Munch 26, 2016
Once Ant Elli and her family arrived, the Boy, the Mommy, the Nighttime Pals and I moved to the living-in room. The Mommy stowed all their bags behind the bookshelf, and every night, she unfolds the couch to make a bed. In this new place, the Boy sleeps as well as ever, on his stomach with his arms and legs spread out, but the Mommy sleeps in fits and snorts. I went into her dreams a few times to try to help her, but there were no real monsters in there. Just a lot of inky clouds and memories of Grandma's house from years and years ago. I don't know why a house can make you toss and turn, especially when there is no one in it.
I thought I saw a bad monster once, but it was Pappy's cat, Mia-Mew. She is very loud, but she only speaks cat. Loud is annoying, but it doesn't make you a bad monster.
For the last couple days, Ant Elli and the Mommy have gone back to Grandma's house for most of the day. They wear masks and gloves and white bunny suits. But without the ears. They still smell a lot like cats when they come back, and they are very tired and go to bed early. Fortunately, due to the lack of bad monsters, I have had very little real work to do and can spend the night looking out the window at all the million stars in the sky over Pappy's place.
Sundae, Munch 27, 2016
Today we drove home. The Boy didn't want to (he never wants to), but he spent time with the Mommy, Fee-Fee and May-May in the park before we left. They came back smelling like river air, grass, and tulips. They have smelled like that a lot this week, after outings with Uncle Jeff.
The Nighttime Pals hid when it was time to go, because they wanted to spend more time with their new friends, Dinosaur, Dolly and the Artick Hair. But Fee-Fee and the Boy grabbed everyone and put us all in the right bags. I poked my head out of our bag and watched the fields roll by on the way home, as the Boy slept and the Mommy sang along to a song about silence. And then, not so silently, sobbed.
Adventures are fun, but also tiring. I am glad to be home, where I know all the shadows and the shadows know me.
Me, the Mommy and the Boy
Monsterday, Munch 21, 2016
My Boy, the Nighttime Pals, and I are on an Adventure. We are staying at the old man's house, whose name is Pappy. He has a mustache and likes to talk. Not with the mustache, although sometimes the mustache is the only one who seems to be listening. He mostly talks to the Boy's Mommy, who has been gone much of the day for two days straight. When she comes back, she takes a shower right away and won't let the Boy hug her first. She smells like she has rolled around on a veterinarian's lawn. She brings back clear plastic bins, mostly filled with papers, and sits on the couch, sorting them. Some are tossed into a large plastic bag (for shedding), some go into the trash can (for throwing up), and some are placed gently on the table (for keeps). All night long, Pappy talks to her, and her eyes look far away, her mouth set in a thin line. Maybe she is thinking about monsters.
The Nighttime Pals and I are sleeping on a very high, small bed. Last night, the Boy kicked us out on the floor while having a bad dream. I landed first, so Bunny and Bear both landed on me and can stop complaining about how high it was and how hard they landed. It is a good thing monsters bounce.
From my place on the floor, I got a better view under the bed. No bad monsters. Just the way I like it. Scaring bad monsters away is much easier when there are no bad monsters to scare.
Tootsday, Munch 22, 2016
The Boy was very cross last night, because he spent all day with his Mommy, sitting in offices and playing games on his LeapPad. He complained it was "not very fun." He didn't take me with him, so I don't know exactly what his Mommy was doing in the offices, but I heard her talking on the phone. She said something about signing a compact with an octoneer, whatever that is. Or maybe it was an octopus? Or an engineer? Whoever it was will be selling the old lady's house, the Mommy says. The old lady's name was Grandma, and she used to walk very slow and talk in a sweet, gentle voice to the Boy. They used to paint things together.
After Grandma died, the Boy and his older cousin drew everything they could see, even pictures of me. I was very flattened. Because paper makes you two-diamond-sional. I was also flattered.
The Boy's drawing on top, the cousin's drawing below
Thornsday, Munch 24, 2016
Today was a very good day. My Boy made me my own car! A car is a thing with wheels that someone pushes around, and you sit in it and go "Wheee!" inside your head. The best part: zipping down the hard-wood floor in the hallway. The worst part: bumping down the steps. When we go down the steps, I usually go, "Aaaaaaaa!!!" inside my head.
The Mommy's sister has arrived. Her name is Ant Elli, which I think means she is part ant and part elephant. She brought her husband, Uncle Jeff, and her little girls, who have names I never hear very well. They talk differently from the Boy, and their voices are very high and get caught in my horns. I call the older one Fee-Fee and the younger one May-May, which is close enough. They are fun, because they like to play with me and the Nighttime Pals. Fee-Fee brought us one by one into the big red room for living in (not for sleeping, which has its own special and important room). Bear, Bunny and Cow got to mingle with Fee-Fee's toys, and she got out a stealth-a-scope and listened to all of our inside voices. (I said "Weee!" just for her, and she smiled.) May-May gave me lots of hugs and drooled on me. I don't mind, because baby drool is a great way to scare away bad monsters, if they ever show up.
The boy pushes me in my car.
Saturnday, Munch 26, 2016
Once Ant Elli and her family arrived, the Boy, the Mommy, the Nighttime Pals and I moved to the living-in room. The Mommy stowed all their bags behind the bookshelf, and every night, she unfolds the couch to make a bed. In this new place, the Boy sleeps as well as ever, on his stomach with his arms and legs spread out, but the Mommy sleeps in fits and snorts. I went into her dreams a few times to try to help her, but there were no real monsters in there. Just a lot of inky clouds and memories of Grandma's house from years and years ago. I don't know why a house can make you toss and turn, especially when there is no one in it.
I thought I saw a bad monster once, but it was Pappy's cat, Mia-Mew. She is very loud, but she only speaks cat. Loud is annoying, but it doesn't make you a bad monster.
For the last couple days, Ant Elli and the Mommy have gone back to Grandma's house for most of the day. They wear masks and gloves and white bunny suits. But without the ears. They still smell a lot like cats when they come back, and they are very tired and go to bed early. Fortunately, due to the lack of bad monsters, I have had very little real work to do and can spend the night looking out the window at all the million stars in the sky over Pappy's place.
Sundae, Munch 27, 2016
Today we drove home. The Boy didn't want to (he never wants to), but he spent time with the Mommy, Fee-Fee and May-May in the park before we left. They came back smelling like river air, grass, and tulips. They have smelled like that a lot this week, after outings with Uncle Jeff.
The Nighttime Pals hid when it was time to go, because they wanted to spend more time with their new friends, Dinosaur, Dolly and the Artick Hair. But Fee-Fee and the Boy grabbed everyone and put us all in the right bags. I poked my head out of our bag and watched the fields roll by on the way home, as the Boy slept and the Mommy sang along to a song about silence. And then, not so silently, sobbed.
Adventures are fun, but also tiring. I am glad to be home, where I know all the shadows and the shadows know me.
Me, the Mommy and the Boy