Sweet Spots
I tend to have these... soft spots, if you will, for certain people. For a very long time it has primarily been for Patrick. Anything he needed or wanted that I could provide for him, I did. It never did me any good. Half the time he was pissed off that I helped him (because he HATES having other peoples help). As time has gone on he has lost his place. I realize more and more every day that he is no longer my responsibility, which is hard for me to admit because I worried about him for so long. I just realized the other day that I am replacing him... with Billy. You may be wondering, Billy? What about Brian? I may have had a thing for Brian, but never a soft spot. The only difference between Patrick and Billy is I am not in love with Billy. Every night he's home, I offer to make him dinner (and almost every night I do make it for him). I used to offer to give him massages (he has a bad back, that constantly hurts him but I found out that massages hurt him). Last time I went grocery shopping I bought pizza (which I don't eat) just because he said he wanted it. No matter what I'm watching I give him the remote so he can watch whatever he wants. When he gets back from Europe in a few weeks him and I are going to pick out a dog together (not OUR dog, my dog with his opinion). When he lays on the couch I let him sprawl all over me. I don't know why I do this. I was bringing our dishes into the kitchen when we were done eating ice cream and he asked me for a Gatorade. For some reason, unbeknownst to me, on my way from the kitchen to the living room I opened it for him. No reason. He's fully capible of opening his own drink. But I did it anyways. It's been like this since we moved in. The funny thing is, most of the stuff that happens in the house, we agree on but usually Rob seems to have a different view. Like yesterday for instance. Rob decided he wanted to go out and buy a book shelf for all his books and put it downstairs where my Love Sack was and put my Love Sack in my room because "we have more than enough sitting space". It looks odd where it is. Also, the Love Sack was hiding all the freaking cords we have. Not to mention I didn't finish the trim, thinking it was going to be hidden. I don't know. I don't understand why I'm acting this way. I don't know why I can't say No to Billy. I don't know why I feel like I'm bending over backwards on purpose for him.
-Need to get some...
-Need to get some...